In which I talk to my asexual brother about what they wanted and what they did when they first came out as ace.
HOW WILL YOU EVER KNOW?
Even if your career goal is to totally nail every single element of your role eventually, acknowledging that you’re already crushing a few tasks will ideally build your confidence as you work on mastering the whole shebang.
It will take time. It will take a lot of patience. It will be worth it.
You just broke up with your partner, you’re buying IKEA furniture, moving into a share house and you’re sad — how do you become a functioning adult again?
Let’s get down to business. The business of getting down to business with an itchy vag.
“You feel broken or like you’ve done something wrong but you haven’t. Wanting to not feel bad isn’t wrong.”
You are in love with someone who wants different things. What do you do?
You want to have a bachelorette party together, but your girlfriend loves the spotlight and you don’t. Here’s how you navigate that.
“We want these labels to tell us who we are and what we want because figuring out who we are and what we want in a big expansive lawless space is HARD.”
Sometimes we love people who don’t share our same value systems or knowledge sets. It doesn’t mean we shouldn’t love them, but it can mean we need to work hard to make sure we aren’t compromising our own values just to placate them.
The thing about being a top or a bottom is that it’s all in your head.
“My body does not seem to be able to handle being aroused for more than 5–10 minutes at a time… Is there any way I can retrain my body to be better able to maintain arousal?”
There is nothing wrong with you. Promise.
The fact that you’re working through all this now doesn’t say anything negative about you or the way you moved through life for the past 24 years. What you did then was valid, and what you’re doing now is valid.
Just kidding it’s not quite 7. They’re still good ones though.
So you’re engaged, but your fiancée won’t let you tell anyone about it yet. What to do?
In which we try to determine whether a questioner’s recent breakup was the right move, or whether they should try to rectify it.
Your girlfriend wants an open relationship and you agreed to it, but now you feel terrible all the time. What to do?
“When my boyfriend came out to me as trans, he was worried what that would mean for me and us. It’s a few months later and I should be really happy for him. And I am! But I’m starting to feel kind of lost and scared and I don’t know if it has to do with the fact, that he is, of course, changing.”