Relevant To Your Interests: You and Your Dog Are Both Nerds

So we panic adopted a dog to counteract this veritable dumpster fire of a year. That is what I did with my week. We named her Edith Windsor. Here she is.

Welcome to the family, Edith Windsor Cooper Osworth! ? by @iamaghostcat

A photo posted by Ali Osworth (@aeosworth) on

While I don’t recommend this course of action for just anyone (it can be really stressful, and expensive, and Edith is a five-month-old puppy so I am very tired right now), my mental health is frickin’ awesome. I basically have to interrupt my work day (or my social media think piece panic spiral) with a walk. Outside. In the sun.

We thought we were adopting an average dog, one that would need training because she’s a puppy, sure. We knew we were adopting a dog who had no training and would need to work with her. Well in two days she nailed sit, down and focus. She has object permanence and looks up at pigeons. She can solve her puzzle feeder. She is, in short, a brilliant genius Ravenclaw and I would expect nothing less. Turns out, my dog is a nerd too. Is your dog a nerd? If so, the following items might be relevant to your interests.

Attire

nerd-dog-wear

Dinosaur collar, $30. Hook + Albert matching bowties for dog and person, $65. Batman collar, $25.

Play

nerd-dog-play-1

Set of four emoji toys, $33. Treat dispensing pencil and steer stick, $16. Flying saucer toy, $9. Dog homework, $8.

screen-shot-2016-11-16-at-12-02-10-pm

And for dogs who have nerd smarts: Mazee treat puzzle, $21 and the Buster Activity Mat, $69.

Obligatory Lesbian Joke

nerd-dog-gay

Fish taco treats, $6. Fish taco chew toy, $8.

I did name my dog Edie Windsor, after all.

Staff Writer for Autostraddle, Part-time Faculty at The New School (teaching digital storytelling), Managing Editor for Scholar & Feminist Online at Barnard Center for Research On Women. Follow me on Twitter @AEOsworth or on Instagram, also @AEOsworth.

A.E. has written 543 articles for us.

20 Comments

  1. Thank you Ali, thank you Edie Windsor (the person), thank you Edie Windsor (the dog).

    I’m so glad that you recognize how smart your dog is. Too many people don’t engage with their dog’s intelligence, then the dog becomes bored/destructive and the owners blame the dog instead of training it. *massive eye roll as the child of a dog groomer / dog training WIZARD who has talked about this for twenty years*

  2. My girlfriend and I were positing that if more queer couples were capable of accidentally procreating (I know some are), there would be a baby boom nine months after the election from all of the end of the world sex people had. Instead, of course, this is the reality: everyone panic adopting animals! ? I love Edie’s name. Congratulations, Ali. And I never realized, somehow, that dog puzzles were a thing – going to invest in some of those right away!

    • Oh, yes! There are even sustainably made, 100% natural materials, part-recycled dog puzzles. They’ve been on the market for ages. My parents bought my elder dog one 10 years ago that’s made from several wood circles with drilled pockets for treats, stacked on top of each other, topped by a lid with two holes and screwed together loosely. The dog has to spin the top layer to align the holes in the lid with the treat pockets. Then they have to align the top hole with a hole in the second layer to get to the treats on the third spinning layer.

  3. Puppppppies!!

    I’ve been craving a kitten lately and hadn’t made the obvious connection.

    We had to put down our beloved 17 y.o. cat the Friday after the election. I know I’m not really ready to adopt another animal just yet, but I notice that I’m spending A LOT more time with my remaining cat. (Who very obligingly denies the ball when I toss it to her, until she gets bored and lets it bounce off her nose).

    I keep thinking that maybe we should get a kitten to keep her company, once we’re not grieving (as much). But I know the kitten would just be for me.

  4. What a coincidence, I also just got a puppy about two weeks ago (although it was not in a panic, I’ve been planning on it for a few months now, she just happened to show up now!). She’s brought so much light into my life- and a lot of craziness, but mostly adorableness and snuggles!
    (Also she’s definitely a nerd too – I named her Abby after the Ghostbusters character, obvs)
    I’d upload a picture but I’m not quite sure how so just imagine a very cute almost-20-week-old golden retriever lab mix puppy here..

  5. Oh my GOD, Edie is SO CUTE??? Those EARS.

    Thank you so much for these ideas. My dog is a paper FIEND, so I’m definitely buying him the “homework” toy.

    Question/advice wanted from any other pup parents out there: Does anyone know of some DURABLE puzzle toys? My Flynn is a 45 pound hound/pit mix who has jaws of steel. He’s a smart little dude, so I’ve been trying to find toys to help keep him engaged. I bought him a wooden puzzle toy, but the very first time he used it, he basically ripped it apart (and exposed some staples holding it together, YIKES).

Contribute to the conversation...

You must be logged in to post a comment.