This is a rare and special personality quiz in the sense that it will offer you not only insight on yourself but also insight on the inner workings and past lives of the quiz maker. Yes, all of these results are real, actual tweets I fired off from 2009-2012, a period of time when I mainly only used Twitter when tumblr was down. It was like backup tumblr. It was also a period of time when I was not out of the closet, but the tweets beg to differ.
Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya is the managing editor of Autostraddle and a lesbian writer of essays, short stories, and pop culture criticism living in Orlando. She is the assistant managing editor of TriQuarterly, and her short stories appear or are forthcoming in McSweeney's Quarterly Concern, Joyland, Catapult, The Offing, and more. Some of her pop culture writing can be found at The A.V. Club, Vulture, The Cut, and others. You can follow her on Twitter or Instagram and learn more about her work on her website.
Kayla has written 814 articles for us.
I got “‘surprisingly heterosexual’” and although I had been out for just about an entire year when you tweeted it, I do relate to the concept of tweeting something from tumblr in the year 2011.
unsurprisingly i am drunk kayla
I got “ultimate birthday party theme idea: michelle branch + leather”
Which is somehow incredibly accurate for my closeted self in that era.
Also bless you for the option “painting my room sounds like too much work,” I felt very seen.
I need to see the rest of the possible answers!!
I always take quizzes twice to cover the answers I almost chose. This time I got Sectionals and “surprisingly heterosexual,” and both descriptions were frighteningly on-point
Absolutely no surprise that I got the Glee sectionals tweet, I keep trying to deny my inner theater kid but frequently rewatching the best Glee performances (90% Santana videos, obviously) on youtube says otherwise!!!
I’m surprisingly heterosexual. The last person who really thought that was my mother in 10th grade. She was like really? Are you? I was not.
#boobs
Definitely something I would’ve posted / laughed at / thought about in 2009 …and also today. Honestly timeless
Too true!
“yay moms
You aim to please, and you specifically aim to please hot moms.”
Almost true! I’m the same age as hot moms and like to be pleased, thank you.
Hah! I also got “yay moms” and I am also hot mom age.
Same.
Also I did paint my bedroom; it was hard work (and entirely worth it). Bisexual lighting colours is not quite what I chose, but considering that my sitting room is blue, my hallway dark fuchsia, my bedroom finishes off the flat in high bisexual pride form by being lavender.
(I did not consciously set out to paint the house bi pride colours: it’s just apparently my unconscious preferences were really into it)
“yay moms”
This quiz knew I’ve watched Carol twice in the past week
“well I just bought a full iron man costume (again)
How many Iron Man costumes does one closeted lesbian NEED? The answer is at least two. You too are passionate about the things you love, and the things you love skew a little nerdy. You know how to win a costume contest, and you know how to have a good time just about anywhere.”
Halloween sorted, thanks Kayla
yay moms!!
I got yay moms too! Twice actually after retaking it with slightly altered answers!
“Alison Brie that’s the (drunk) tweet” – on brand in a number of ways
I agree, ‘yay moms’.
alison brie drunk tweet. lol. ok yeah that’s the vibe, i don’t make sense in a word-brain way but i can for sure feel that tweet