What The World Needs Now Is More Same-Sex Figure Skating Pairs, Am I Right Ladies

Retired Olympians Want to Change the Game for Same-Sex Figure Skating Duos

France's Gabriella Papadakis (L) and US' Madison Hubbell perfom during the "Art on Ice" figure skating gala in Zurich, on February 6, 2025. Olympic champions Gabriella Papadakis and Madison Hubbell on February 6, 2025, took to the ice at a figure skating gala in Zurich trying to "push the limit" of the sport as a first same-sex couple to skate together. (Photo by ARND WIEGMANN / AFP) (Photo by ARND WIEGMANN/AFP via Getty Images)

(Photo by ARND WIEGMANN/AFP via Getty Images)

Two major retired Olympic skaters want to change the game and open up the field to more same-sex figure skating duos. Gabriella Papadakis (who is bisexual) and Madison Hubbell (who is, as far as I can tell, straight) paired up for an Art on Ice Gala in Switzerland, and hope they will just be the first of many. While their intention is mainly to help solve the issue of gender imbalance in the sport — more women than men tend to get into figure skating, making the pairings uneven when limited to male/female couples — they have acknowledged that this could also mean progress for same-sex couples in the queer sense of the term. Papadakis said, “It wasn’t our basic intention but we realise what it can represent, what it can show, for us, it’s something that is close to our hearts too.” So their motivation isn’t the same as, say, when JoJo Siwa said she would only go on Dancing with the Stars if she was paired with a woman, but rising tides lift all boats and all that.

Regardless of their original motivation, Papadakis and Hubbell are attempting to break barriers and question codes that have gone unquestioned for so long. They have been skating together since they both retired in 2022 when, after a unanimous ruling, Skate Canada removed all gendered language from its competition rulebook, meaning same-sex skating partners were no longer strictly verboten. They didn’t specifically mention it but hopefully this gender-free language will also help more nonbinary athletes gaining the ability to perform, joining Olympian figure skater Timothy LeDuc.

I personally think this means it’s the perfect time for a sapphic ice skating movie. Think The Cutting Edge meets Bend it Like Beckham. Maybe Will Graham and Abbi Jacobson are available.

Check out Papadakis and Hubbell’s latest interview here:


More Queer Pop Culture Stories For Your Day:

+ Ariana DeBose’s character in Love Hurts isn’t queer, but Ariana herself says she feels a connection to her character Rosa’s ethos, especially right now with attacks on the LGBTQ+ community coming from the government, saying: “‘Hiding ain’t living.’ And I actually don’t think that anyone should have to hide who they are.”

+ Lady Gaga preformed at the Super Bowl pre-game, her performance “dedicated to honoring the strength of communities impacted by tragedy across the country.”

+ Production for Euphoria Season 3 has begun and some first look photos have been released

+ Chappell Roan wants real action in the industry, not for artists and fans to have to help struggling artists

+ Queer author Kalynn Bayron announced that her next book, Make Me a Monster, is available for pre-sale

+ There was a sort of mass gay wedding situation during a challenge on The Traitors (I don’t go here but that sounds fun to me!)

+ In the latest hyenas-supporting-Scar-against-their-better-interest news, trans retired athlete Caitlyn Jenner supports the trans athlete ban

+ Laverne Cox is willing to re-traumatize herself for art and for the people looking to know they’re not alone in her series Clean Slate

+ Meryl Streep’s daughter Louisa Jacobson has felt the support of her community after coming out last year

+ Ayo Edebiri directed a Clairo music video starring Weird Al, a sentence Them hilariously called “queer Mad Libs”

+ Amber Ruffin is going to headline the White House Correspondents’ Dinner and the fact that she’s Blacka and queer is significant

+ A new Thunderbolts* trailer dropped during the Super Bowl

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Valerie Anne

Valerie Anne (she/they) a TV-loving, video-game-playing nerd who loves reading, watching, and writing about stories in all forms. While having a penchant for sci-fi, Valerie will watch anything that promises a good story, and especially if that good story is queer.

Valerie has written 620 articles for us.

3 Comments

  1. I came to the *exact* same conclusion about a Cutting Edge meets Bend It Like Beckham (but make it actually gay) remix! If shall have the chance to watch their skating performance (I found it on YouTube) it is stunning!

Comments are closed.

New Lucy Dacus Video “Best Guess” Is Full of Hot Mascs

Lucy Dacus’ last solo album Home Video is one of my favorite albums ever. Filled with pained nostalgia, these songs reflected on closeted queer youth, fractured familial relationships, and getting out while leaving others behind. But after reuniting with boygenius, going on a tour filled with joyous makeouts, and falling in love with one of her bandmates, Dacus is back with a very different picture of queerness.

Her first new single “Ankles” was a sexy and romantic bop with a Portrait of a Lady on Fire-inspired music video co-starring Havana Rose Liu. And now she’s here with another very gay music video even more likely to take over the gay internet.

We knew we were in for something good when Dacus announced on TikTok that she was looking for hot mascs. And the excitement only doubled when images were released yesterday of Dacus in a suit alongside other famous queers like Towa Bird, Naomi McPherson, and ER Fightmaster. Well now the video has been released and it does not disappoint!

The lyrics to the song — I love your body/I love your mind/They will change/So will mine/But you are my best guess/At the future — are a swoon-worthy message to Julien Baker. But in the context of the video with a wide-range of mascs hanging out, arm-wrestling, playing poker, playing pool, and, yes, kissing, it also becomes a broader message about loving someone through change. Is Lucy a femme with heart eyes for this room of mascs/her masc or is she also a masc? Queer discourse often wants people to fit neatly into label categories and I love that this is both a celebration of masc identity while also an acknowledgment of its fluidity.

When recently asked about her pronouns on Gaydar, Dacus said with a smile, “How dare you ask?” Part of being a queer person in love is understanding that you and your partner(s) are very likely to change. Pronouns, body parts, fashion, labels. To love someone fully is to love these changes. It’s true of all relationships — last time I checked straight cis people change too — but queer people, at our best, are more likely to embrace these changes.

These blurred identity lines are paired with blurred relationship lines. Dacus and Baker started as friends and bandmates before falling in romantic love and this video captures that as well. A bunch of bros hanging out doesn’t have to be romantic or sexy, but it sure can be!


Lucy Dacus’ album Forever Is a Feeling comes out on March 28.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!
Related:

Drew Burnett Gregory

Drew is a Brooklyn-based writer, filmmaker, and theatremaker. She is a Senior Editor at Autostraddle with a focus in film and television, sex and dating, and politics. Her writing can also be found at Bright Wall/Dark Room, Cosmopolitan UK, Refinery29, Into, them, and Knock LA. She was a 2022 Outfest Screenwriting Lab Notable Writer and a 2023 Lambda Literary Screenwriting Fellow. She is currently working on a million film and TV projects mostly about queer trans women. Find her on Twitter and Instagram.

Drew Burnett has written 662 articles for us.

9 Comments

    • if they are, it seems like they want to keep it private. Not sure if we can (or should) describe these lyrics as a love song to Julien?? There’s a bunch of random people making posts on X and TikTok about them being in a relationship but nothing I can see from either of them.

    • It would be if there were fat people, dark skinned folks, or actual butches instead of a group of people who mostly look the same!

  1. Disappointed this article ignores the video not passing the paper bag test amongst other issues. I expected AS would be on it and am very surprised to not see it mentioned

    • It is VERY noticeable and I don’t even know this lady. But I figure her fans are probably all lighter than a paperbag anyway. Also, I am just more than over begging white folks for inclusion so…enjoy. Everything ain’t for me.

  2. Petals.es is a leading online bakery based in Madrid, Spain, specializing in handcrafted cakes, pastries, and desserts. With a commitment to quality, creativity, and exceptional customer service, Petals.es strives to bring the authentic flavors of Spain to customers worldwide through its delicious range of baked goods

  3. Petals.es is a leading online bakery based in Madrid, Spain, specializing in handcrafted cakes, pastries, and desserts. With a commitment to quality, creativity, and exceptional customer Petals.es strives to bring the authentic flavors of Spain to customers worldwide through its delicious range of baked goods

Comments are closed.

Hulu’s 30 Original TV Shows With Lesbian and Bisexual Women Characters

What TV shows could you watch on Hulu if you want to see some gay, lesbian or bisexual women characters? Hulu’s original content keeps getting more queer and there are so many television programs for the LGBT audience, and if you’re looking for the answers to these questions — and I think you are, because here you are — boy have I got the post for you, my friend! (We’ve also got a list of the best queer movies on Hulu if you’re in the market for that.)

Although Hulu famously hosts content from a variety of studios and networks, this list is focused on Hulu originals, collaborations and exclusives — shows you can expect to remain on Hulu in most of the markets they serve. Except for, of course, the ones they’ve removed. (Dollface and Marvel’s Runaways, so far.)


The 10 Best and Most LGBTQ+ Hulu Original Television Shows

The Bisexual

2019 // One Season // 6 Episodes

Image: Leila (played by Desiree Akhavan), an Iranian-American woman with short dark hair in a pajama shirt, is on a bed looking lovingly at her girlfriend, an older white woman with curly blonde hair and a robe.

The Bisexual sets itself apart by featuring a diverse group of lesbian friends in addition to focusing on the queer protagonist’s narrative and the entire show just feels so undeniably authentic. “Akhavan has done something truly brilliant here,” wrote Heather Hogan in her review. “She’s created a show for an audience that understands the joke ‘Bette is a Shane trying to be a Dana’ and then centers it on a character who’s meant to make everyone who gets that joke a little uncomfortable.”

Watch The Bisexual on Hulu

Such Brave Girls

2023- // One Season // 6 Episodes //  BBC3 Co-Production

two skeptical girls in their early 20s in "Such Brave Girls"

Such Brave Girls is a riotous, disgusting, in-your-face comedy about a dysfunctional family (two sisters and a single mom, all of them varying degrees of delulu) trying and often failing to get their shit together that Kayla describes as “discomfort comedy at its finest.” Josie, fresh out of a psychiatric ward, knows she’s gay but can’t seem to break up with her boyfriend. This is an underrated gem you truly should not miss.

Watch Such Brave Girls on Hulu

Creamerie

2 Seasons // 12 Episodes // TVNZ Co-Production

the lead characters of creamerie at their dairy farm

Set in New Zealand, Creamerie focuses on three best friends (played by Ally Xue, JJ Fong and Perlina Lau, who also serve as creative producers) living on a dairy farm in a world where everyone with a Y chromosome was wiped out by a virus, sperm has become “white gold,” and everyone is under control of Wellness, a white-robed matriarchy with secretly sinister operations. Xue is Alex, a gutsy lesbian who is an outspoken critic of the organization and wants to take it all down. Creamerie is funny and smart, there’s a lesbian makeout scene almost immediately and it has interesting things to say about gender, power and family.

Watch Creamerie on Hulu

Reboot

2022 // One Season // 8 Episodes

Hannah on set coming out

Hannah (Rachel Bloom) tells Hulu (it’s meta!) that she wants to reboot classic sitcom Step Right Up… but make it edgy. What she doesn’t tell them in the original pitch is that the original showrunner was in fact her father, with whom she has a contentious relationship, and that Step Right Up was his way of re-telling his own story in a less-horrifying manner. And, as Heather wrote in her glowing review, “basically every single woman on this show is, in some way, gay! Surprisingly gay! Hilariously gay! Subversively gay!”

Watch Reboot on Hulu

Little Fires Everywhere

2020 // Limited Series // 8 Episodes

Mia and Izzy in the kitchen in Little Fires Everywhere

This brilliant adaptation of the bestselling book adds some queer elements that weren’t explicitly present on the page for the characters of Izzy and Mia Warren (played by Kerry Washington, who produced the series with co-star Reese Witherspoon). Set in an affluent Ohio suburb in the ’90s, Little Fires Everywhere is a searing investigation of class, race and the idea of “good white people.”

Watch Little Fires Everywhere on Hulu

Black Cake

2023 // One Season // 8 Episodes

black cake benny and byron

After her death, two siblings who’d been estranged since one of them came out at Thanksgiving eight years prior, learn about their mother’s dark past from recordings she leaves to them. Based on Charmaine Wilkerson’s novel of the same name, Nic writes that,Black Cake is part family drama and part murder mystery, Black Cake is about family, identity, and the ways our choices reverberate through our future. It’s about the stories we tell and more importantly, the ones we don’t, whether out of love, protection, fear, or survival.” 

Watch Black Cake on Hulu

Shrill

2019-2021 // 3 Seasons // 22 Episodes

Two hot queers in suits

Aidy Bryant stars in this adaptation of writer Lindy West’s memoir, in which she navigates the world as a young journalist in a fatphobic world, including working at an eccentric Seattle newspaper with a very weird person named Ruthie played by our favorite weirdo Patti Harrison. Her best friend, Fran, is a black British lesbian with all the self-confidence Annie herself lacks, and her romantic storylines eventually land her in a delightful relationship with Emily (ER Fightmaster).

Under the Bridge

2024 // Limited Series // 8 Episodes

rebecca and cam in the bathroom

Based on Rebecca Godfrey’s book by the same name, Under the Bridge tells the tragic story of the assault and murder of 15-year-old Reena Virk, a precocious Canadian teenager lured into the night by friends who turned out to be her attackers. Rebecca is a writer from New York, back home to write a book about “the troubled girls of Victoria” when the murder occurs, thrusting her back into orbit with Cameron (Lily Gladstone), with whom she shares a complicated past, and a very queer present.

Watch Under the Bridge on Hulu

Wreck

2023- // 2+ Seasons // 12 Episodes 

Vivian and Jamie in Wreck, covered in blood

Hulu picked up this British comedy horror about a young gay teen who gets a cruise ship job to investigate the disappearance of his sister on said ship. On said ship he works with Vivian (Thaddea Graham), a lesbian who works on the ship after fleeing her homophobic family and Rosie (Miya Ocego), a trans woman who works as a Cher impersonator. Kayla loved the show for its portrayal of a gay guy/lesbian friendship, the relationship between Vivian and her eventual love interest Lily, and its “stunning horror.”

Watch Wreck on Hulu

I Kissed a Girl

2024 // 1+ Season // 10 Episodes // BBC

girls laughing and whooping

This UK import, launched after the success of I Kissed a Boy, is an entirely sapphic dating show that challenged its contestants to kiss immediately upon meeting each other and go from there! Twenty lesbians hang out around The Masseria, gossiping about who fancies whomst. “If you’re the kind of person that enjoys spending the morning after a big night dissecting everything that happened, more than you enjoyed the night itself, you will get a lot out of this show,” wrote Sally.

Watch I Kissed a Girl on Hulu.

Pose

2018 – 2021 // 3 Seasons // 26 Episodes // FX

pose

A brief, brilliant moment in television history, Pose focused on the Black and Latinx trans and queer people who competed as “houses’ in New York City’s thriving underground ball culture of the ’80s and ’90s and face the growing HIV/AIDS crisis. Cast members include Angelica Ross, Sandra Bernhard, Michaela Jaé Rodriguez, Billy Porter, Indya Moore, Evan Peters, Kate Mara, James Van Der Beek and Dominique Jackson.

Watch Pose on Hulu.


All The Other Hulu Original TV Shows With Lesbian and Queer TV Shows

The Handmaid’s Tale

2017— 2025 // 5+ Seasons // 56+ Episodes 

handmaids tale stoning

Based on Margaret Atwood’s dystopian novel, The Handmaid’s Tale is one of Hulu’s signature properties, a daring and atmospheric journey into and beyond the book’s groundwork of a chilling anti-feminist dystopia. There’s a few lesbian and queer characters across the seasons, including Samira Wiley is Moira Strand, June’s lesbian best friend since college forced to work as a Jezebel after escaping Handmaid training.

Watch The Handmaid’s Tale on Hulu

Harlots

Hulu/ITV // 2017 – 2019 // 3 Seasons // 24 Episodes

Image: a fancy assortment of women at a brothel in long-ago England. Charlotte is front and center in a fancy red dress, and women are posing behind her like they are art. Harlots is one of the lesbian shows on Hulu.

I declared Harlots the most accurate portrayal of indoor-market sex work ever represented onscreen in Season One — surprisingly more resonant to me as a former sex worker than any contemporary portrayals — and its extra queering in Season Two made it moreso and then some. If Season One was about sex work, Season Two is about the reality that what’s done to sex workers is inextricable from what’s done to all women — the lessons about power, violence, solidarity and struggle in stories about sex work are ones that the larger conversation about gender ignores at its peril. Season Three I would prefer not to discuss, thank you. // Watch Harlots on Hulu

Dopesick

2021 // One Season // 8 Episodes

Betsy and her girlfriend in the bathroom

Based on Beth Macy’s non-fiction book, this acclaimed limited series tackled the opioid crisis from multiple angles: The Sackler family who got rich lying about a highly addictive drug, the Purdue Pharma salespeople trained to exploit doctors and shortchange patients, the D.A.s and other government employees who dared to build a case against Purdue and, finally, the residents of a small coal mining down in Virginia that became ground zero for the epidemic. In that town we meet Betsy (Katelyn Dever, who earned an Emmy nomination for her role), a closeted lesbian coal miner whose on-the-job injury leads to a prescription that leads, soon enough, to addiction. // Watch Dopesick on Hulu

Mrs. America 

2020 // Limited Series // 9 Episodes // FX co-production

mrs america gloria steinhem and another blonde white lady

Sarah Paulson, Niecy Nash, Cate Blanchett, Tracy Ullman, Rose Byrne, Uzo Abuba and Melanie Lynskey are just some of the wildly talented women at the forefront of this history of the feminist movement in the 1970s and its fight against conservative activist Phyllis Shalafley (Cate Blanchett), specifically. Bria Henderson plays Black lesbian early Ms. magazine editor Margaret Sloan-Hunter. In episode five, Ari Graynor shows up as Brenda Feigen, a feminist activist and attorney who falls for Jules, a lesbian photographer portrayed by the one and only Roberta Colindrez. In Episode 7, we briefly glimpse Midge Costanza and Jean O’Leary, a lesbian couple who pushed for inclusion in the feminist agenda and within the Carter administration. // Watch Mrs America on Huliu.

The Other Black Girl

2023 // Limited Series // 8 Episodes

mailaka and nella giving each other a look on the

This adaptation of the bestselling thriller finds a young publishing aspirant, Nella, the only Black girl in her office, thrilled when a second Black girl is hired. But her relationship with the new girl, while promising at first, eventually turns suspicious and is the ticket to unveiling some larger forces at work. Nella’s queer best friend, Malaika, is the show’s unsung hero and a breath of fresh air. // Watch The Other Black Girl on Hulu

High Fidelity 

2020 // One Season //10 Episodes

Image: Rob, played by zoe Kravitz, looks a little unreadable, her friends are sitting on either side of her in a dark bar, looking confused.

Although Rob’s relationships with women aren’t central to the plot, Zoe Kravtiz’s character is a smart, wry, endearing hot bisexual mess on this truly delightful re-imagination of the original film (which starred John Cusack as Rob), which was based on a Nick Hornsby book. Updated for the current era with a diverse cast of clever, passionate and musically-obsessed hipsters. Unfortunately, it was cancelled after merely one short season. // Watch High Fidelity on Hulu

Love, Victor

2020 – 2022 // 3 Seasons // 28 Episodes

The cutie lesbians in the school hallway of Love Victor

Carmen wrote of this LGBTQ Hulu TV show: “Love, Victor has always led with its sweetness! Even when grappling with serious themes (one of Victor’s love interests has had an alcohol addiction, this season another gay character is almost involved in a hate crime, a different member of their friendship circle has a mom who struggles with clinical depression) the angst level never moves much beyond ‘way harsh Disney Channel.'” And Season Two ends on a gay cliffhanger for perpetual high school popular girl Lake making eyes with Lucy, the ex of the school’s biggest jock, and picks back up in Season Three exactly where you want it to. // Watch Love Victor on Hulu

Only Murders in the Building

2021 – // 4+ Seasons // 40+ Episodes

Only Murders In The Building -- “The Tell

(Photo by: Craig Blankenhorn/Hulu)

From our beloved Jamie Babbit came the Hulu TV show Only Murders in the Building, an immediately buzzy whodunit set in a New York City apartment building where a murder is followed by a homegrown true crime podcast hosted by nosy neighbors Charles (Steve Martin), Oliver (Martin Short) and Mabel (Selena Gomez). In Season One, we had a lesbian cop who remains in the series, but in Season Two Mabel ends up enchanted by a lesbian art gallery owner played by noted agent of chaos Cara Delevingne. Unfortunately it never gets quite that gay (for the ladies) again. // Watch Only Murders in the Building on Hulu

Past Lies

2024 // Limited Series // 6 Episodes

past lies — two women leaning over a computer screen

At the center of the story is Rita (Elena Anaya from Room in Rome), a successful lesbian film director, returns to her hometown with her girlfriend to settle her mother’s estate, only to find herself there for an unexpected event: the remains of a high school classmate, who disappeared on their senior trip 25 years ago, turns up. Her high school friend group, still intact and in her hometown, are shaken, and old ghosts come rattling to the surface in more ways than one. The series is available in Spanish or dubbed in English. // Watch Past Lies on Hulu

This Way Up

2019 – 2021 // 2 Seasons // 12 Episodes // Channel 4 Co-Production

still of three women in winterwear standing in the doorway in "This Way Up"

This cute comedy centers on Aine, an Irish woman living in London who returns from rehab to re-make her life. Her sister, Shona (Sharon Hogan), realizes she is bisexual and dates a co-worker, Charlotte (Indria Varna) in Season One. Soooo… it’s not a big storyline but also don’t you want to see Sharon Hogan be gay for a second?? // Watch This Way Up on Hulu

Utopia Falls

2020 // One Season // 10 Episodes

Utopia Falls characters in their outfits in some kind of market-ish area

It’s hundreds of years in the future and New Babyl, the last living colony on earth, has divided into different sectors for specific industries, from which 24 candidates are chosen to compete in The Examplar performance competition. Six of these candidates are followed by the show’s narrative, including sexually fluid Brooklyn and dancer Sage. // Watch Utopia Falls on Hulu

When We Rise

2017 // Limited Series

Rosie O’Donell as Del Martin, When We Rise

From ’70s San Francisco through the HIV-AIDS crisis and into the repeal of DADT and DOMA, When We Rise is an ambitious overview of many decades of LGBTQ+ history, with a star-studded cast playing some of queer history’s most memorable activists. It tries to do too much, honestly, and thus falters and oversimplifies at times (particularly when it touches on collaborations between lesbians and gay men). But it’s still worth a watch for anyone looking to know more about queer history. // Watch When We Rise on Hulu

Tell Me Lies

2+ Seasons // 18 Episodes // 

Lucy and Pippa in "Tell Me Lies"

What begins as a story of toxic heterosexual college students in love with and lying to each other becomes, eventually, something more queer (particularly in Season 2) — but there’s a lot of hot idiots drinking and manipulating each other to get through first. But it’s got a solid amount of little twists to keep you engaged throughout. // Watch Tell Me Lies on Hulu

Casual

2014 – 2018 // 4 Seasons // 44 Episodes

Alex, Valerie and Laura in Hulu's Casual

(Photo by: Greg Lewis/Hulu)

Smart, irreverent family comedy Casual centers on Valerie (Michaela Watkins), who, along with her daughter Laura (Tara Lynne Barr), moves in with her dating-app-founder brother Alex (Tommy Dewey) after her divorce. In Season One, Alex dates a poly bisexual woman named Emmy, and in Season Two, Laura has a thing with a female friend — and it seems for a bit that that is the end of it, but nope! Laura is bisexual and continues dating and having things with other women through the series’ four seasons. However, you do have to suffer through four seasons of Alex, a very entitled white man! // Watch Casual on Hulu

Class of ’09

2023 // Limited Series // 8 Episodes // FX co-production

Poet and Hour make eye contact at Hour's wedding reception

Queer actress Kate Mara and L Word Generation Q fave Sepideh Moafi star with Brian Tyree Henry in this suspense thriller that follows a class of FBI agents at three points in time as they attempt to grapple with massive changes in the criminal justice system. Moafi plays Hour Nazari, a lesbian who becomes a data specialist with big ambitions and Mara is Ashley Poet, a former nurse who specializes in undercover work. // Watch Class of ’09 on Hulu

Death and Other Details

2024 // One Season // 10 Episodes

death and other details women

This murder mystery set upon a luxury cruise ship is teeming with queers: Anna (Lauren Patten), an heiress to her father’s milling company, and her wife Leila (Pardis Saremi), an eccentric former “clickbait journalist” paranoid after a head injury and Eleanor (Karoline), a member of the family with whom Anna’s family is planning a partnership. Eleanor and Anna also share a complicated romantic past. // Watch Death & Other Details on Hulu

The Girl From Plainville

2022 // Limited Series // 8 Episodes

Girl From Plainville still: Michelle in a sundress with her bicycle, friend in a tank top and boy behind her

This Hulu docuseries traces the very bizarre case of Michelle Carter, who was prosecuted for involuntary manslaughter after her internet boyfriend killed himself following some encouragement via text message from Carter. Elle Fanning’s stand-out performance as Carter, who was bisexual (which is addressed in the series) is amongst many elements giving this psychological complicated story some heart without dwelling heavily in sensationalism. // Watch The Girl from Plainville on Hulu

A Murder at the End of the World

2023 // 7 Episodes

A Murder at the End of the World: A close up of Emma Corin with pink hair cloaked in shadows glancing to the side.

Emma Corin in A Murder at the End of the World

Another show that’s hard to place because it is so good but also not particularly queer — the lead character is, but that queerness is largely irrelevant to the story. It’s a crime drama set in the world of tech, starring Emma Corrin as Darby, a queer hacker trying to solve a series of murders at an isolated resort owned by a tech billionaire. “Darby’s journey isn’t just to solve these two crimes but to reckon with the grief of her childhood that weighs on her and the grief of our world that weighs on us all,” writes Drew in her review. // Watch a Murder at the End of the World on Hulu

East Los High

2013-2017 // 4 Seasons // 61 Episodes

Ser Anzoategui (Vida) made their small-screen debut playing Daysi in this show about a group of interconnected friends at a high school in East LA. The first season has a coming out arc that ends pretty brutally, but it’s a show that tackles a lot of social issues and was Hulu’s first with an all Latino cast and crew. // Watch East Los High on Hulu

The First

2018 // One Season // 8 Episodes

Lisa Gay Hamilton plays Kayla Price, a former mission commander and a lesbian, in this show about the first human mission to Mars. Her wife is played by Gay for Pay Queen Tracie Thoms, of course. Kayla is part of the main ensemble but her sexuality doesn’t come up very often. // Watch The First On Hulu

How I Met Your Father

2022 – 2023 // 2 Seasons // 26 Episodes

In this spin-off of How I Met Your Mother, the framing device is Sophie (Hillary Duff in the present, Kim Catrall in the future)’s story of meeting her son’s father, Jesse. Jesse’s adopted sister, Ellen (Tien Tran) is a farm-owning lesbian who’s just moved to New York City looking for love following her divorce with her wife. Her character was “criminally underused” at first but stepped closer to the spotlight as the season progressed. // Watch How I Met Your Father on Hulu

Light as a Feather

2018-2019 // 2 Seasons // 26 Episodes

Light as a Feather started out as a fun campy horror/teen drama that happened to have a gay character in its main ensemble, and it was all fun in games through Season One and most of Season Two. It had the Final Destination “cheating death” kind of spook factor, mixed in with some supernatural twin stuff and secrets upon secrets upon lies. Season Two gave the queer lead, named Alex of course, a girlfriend, but the end of Season Two took a bit of a turn re: its queer characters. // Watch Light as a Feather on Hulu

Tiny Beautiful Things

2023 // Limited Series // 8 Episodes

This adaptation of Cheryl Strayed’s Tiny Beautiful Things (which was a compilation of her Dear Sugar advice columns ) stars Kathryn Hahn as Claire, a writer who finds herself heading up an advice column while her own life falls apart. In a deviation from its source material, Claire’s husband, Danny, is Black, and their daughter, Rae, is queer and biracial. “The problem with this series,” Drew wrote in her review, “is it wants inclusivity without acknowledging how that changes its central narrative.” // Watch Tiny Beautiful Things on Hulu

Woke 

2020 – 2022 // 2 Seasons // 16 Episodes

Keef Knight is a Black cartoonist on the up-and-up who avoids controversial material in his work — but after being traumatized by an encounter with the police, he gains the ability to see and hear inanimate objects talking to him and is increasingly aware of the racial microaggressions that infiltrate his life. He eventually befriends Ayana (Sasheer Zamata), a lesbian reporter who calls him out. // Watch Woke on Hulu

Letterkenny

2016 – 2023 // 12 Seasons // 81 Episodes

Valerie describes this quirky Canadian comedy as “full of quick-witted, fast-talking folks with very specifically Canadian humor that somehow seems universally hilarious.” Though many of the women are canonically queer, the on-screen proof of that is not always central.// Watch Letterkenny on Hulu

Saint X

2023 // One Season // 8 Episodes 

Saint X is many things, “good” is not one of them, but it has some things going for it. Emily Thomas (Alycia Debnam-Carey) moves to a Caribbean neighborhood in Brooklyn 15 years after her older sister died on a Caribbean island during a family vacation. Authorities said it was an accident but the Thomases believe otherwise, and of course all of this is now resurfacing in Emily’s present-tense life. Her best friend, Sunita (Kosha Patel), is a gay lady! // Watch Saint X on Hulu


TV Shows From Other Networks With Strong Lesbian / Bisexual Storylines That You Can Watch on Hulu:


Other streaming TV lists:

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Riese

Riese is the 43-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3298 articles for us.

The TV Team

The Autostraddle TV Team is made up of Riese Bernard, Carmen Phillips, Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya, Valerie Anne, Natalie, Drew Burnett Gregory, and Nic. Follow them on Twitter!

The TV has written 238 articles for us.

14 Comments

  1. It sometimes feel like these streamers bury their queer content? Like, I literally only watch gay stuff and yet I still have to specifically search it out by title (I’m looking at you, Prime Video/A League of Their Own).

    In any case, thanks for this roundup, Riese and TV Team! I wasn’t aware of several of these shows and now have happily replenished my ‘to watch’ docket.

    And reader, if you have already seen all of these and are still looking for more, please treat yourself to seasons one and two of VIDA (currently on Hulu), because it always bears a rewatch.

  2. Thank you feromuch Riese for all the tips for some of the lesbian and queer content.Always checking it out for there is so much to share.
    Love always from Feromoon

  3. Ooh! So many shows to add to my watch list. I just finished the Creamerie on Hulu, and it had a minor lesbian plot line!

  4. To paraphrase that one overprotective ex character, I would literally saw off my arm for another season of The Bisexual

  5. Thank you for compiling this list, but I’d be reluctant to include Pam and Tommy without a note that Pamela Anderson didn’t consent to this show being made and found the whole thing incredibly distressing:
    https://www.buzzfeed.com/noradominick/pamela-anderson-pam-and-tommy-criticism

    Perhaps dispassionately, I’m fine with it being on the list because it factually fits the definition of this list, but a caveat would be a welcome addition – I think we’ve all experienced the crummy feeling of finding out something was produced unethically after consuming it, so a warning for those who would’ve made a different decision with this info would be welcome.

  6. Never not going to be sad about the cancellation of High Fidelity!! One of most rewatched seasons of television tbh

  7. I’ve been rewatching Vida on Hulu, and also was so delighted to see This Way Up on the list! It’s a lovely show

  8. The Bisexual is one of those shows that I never want to watch because it makes fun of gays/lesbians.
    The process of finding out gender identity is not like that, finding out if you are lesbian or gay is the last step of the process, not the first step.
    In general, most of us first think we are straight, then bisexual, and finally, after challenging ourselves many times, we find out that we are lesbian or gay. This process may take years, they may even get married or have children during these years.
    However, I hope that such shows will not be made again.

  9. I love this list! It’s great to see such a diverse range of LGBTQ+ stories being highlighted. I can’t wait to dive into some of the shows I haven’t seen yet. Thanks for sharing!

Comments are closed.

Quiz: Which ‘Traitors U.S.’ Season 3 Cast Member Are You?

Chaos, betrayal, revenge! The Traitors U.S. season three has been excellent television and it keeps getting better. But have you wondered which of the season three cast members is most like you? Finally, here’s a quiz to find out!

Since there are over twenty people in the cast, not everyone is an option here. (I’m sorry to that guy Wells(?) and Britney Spears’ ex-husband.) But the important people are! Maybe you have main character energy like Bob the Drag Queen or maybe you’re a ruthless competitor like Boston Rob. Maybe you’re confused in a frustrated Carolyn Wiger way or maybe you’re confused in a hilarious Tom Sandoval way. Traitor or faithful, lips open or sealed, take this quiz to have your essence revealed.


Which The Traitors U.S. Season 3 Cast Member Are You?

What would you wear as your Traitors entrance look?(Required)
Do you want to be a traitor or a faithful?(Required)
How would you describe your roundtable approach?(Required)
What would you do during your B-roll?(Required)
Who was your favorite Traitors U.S. Season 2 cast member?(Required)
What's your favorite non-Traitors reality competition show?(Required)
Pick an iconic Alan Cumming performance:(Required)
Pick a famous liar:(Required)
What's your favorite Housewives franchise?(Required)
Which Drag Race alum do you want to see on Season 4?(Required)
Pick a critter you might see around the castle:(Required)
What do you do when someone tells you a secret?(Required)

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!
Related:

Drew Burnett Gregory

Drew is a Brooklyn-based writer, filmmaker, and theatremaker. She is a Senior Editor at Autostraddle with a focus in film and television, sex and dating, and politics. Her writing can also be found at Bright Wall/Dark Room, Cosmopolitan UK, Refinery29, Into, them, and Knock LA. She was a 2022 Outfest Screenwriting Lab Notable Writer and a 2023 Lambda Literary Screenwriting Fellow. She is currently working on a million film and TV projects mostly about queer trans women. Find her on Twitter and Instagram.

Drew Burnett has written 662 articles for us.

4 Comments

  1. See, I figured this was rigged to only say Bob the Drag Queen or Chrishell (hashtag gay icons only), but reading the comments I now feel Very Special for having gotten Bob. Brb, gonna go make another cup of coffee and do some mischief. 💙

Comments are closed.

How I’m Honoring Lunar New Year in a Very Gay Way

feature image photo by Stephanie Keith 100584 / Contributor via Getty Images

I didn’t grow up celebrating Lunar New Year in my home, but throughout my adulthood I’ve taken careful steps to learn how to appropriately celebrate the holiday as someone who is partially Chinese by a long lineage (it’s complicated, see my personal essay I Was Supposed To Be Good At Math). I can’t claim it as my own entirely, but I identify myself and my upbringing within its traditions.

As respectfully as possible, I want to say that any holiday based on the moon and storytelling is inherently gay. I know many queer white folks who colonize sacred Eastern rituals into a hippie-adjacent practice of their own, but I’m not talking about that. I’m simply stating in my unprofessional queer Asian opinion that in my heart of hearts I know there’s a queer ancestor above fully in charge of reading the moon, predicting fortunes, and spreading zodiac gossip. In fact, I have living relatives that already do this.

Lunar New Year is celebrated on the day of the second new moon after the winter solstice. Originally an agricultural tradition, Lunar New Year marks the coming of Spring, often celebrated by reuniting with family and friends, eating good food, wearing red, and doing things to invite good fortune. Like any major family-oriented holiday, this can be a very challenging time for queer folks. Conservative ideals are still grasped tightly in many communities, so some members of the LGBTQ community  queer the holiday through a focus on chosen family. For example, in TIME, Miranda Jeyaretnam writes about a queer couple sending red money envelopes to their friends’ children, a tradition typically straight, married people do for their own children.

Each culture/country celebrates differently, but the origin of the celebration comes from scaring away the Monster Nian. A scary creature from the sea, it would come up to shore each year to hunt villagers. To scare the beast away, villagers set off firecrackers, hang red decorations for protection, and bribe it with money (the red money pockets elders give children). A tale of thrills and horror? Also gay.

The zodiac years are based on a tale about a race between animals called “The Great Race.” The Jade Emperor, a Chinese mythological god, had the animals race across a river. They finished in the order of the calendar we observe now: rat, ox, tiger, rabbit, dragon, snake, horse, goat, monkey, rooster, dog, and pig. In addition to zodiac animals, there are also five elements associated with each year: wood, fire, metal, earth, and water. Astrological-elemental personality forecasts? Also gay. This is the year of the wooden snake, so obviously there’s a lot to unpack there.

When I think “snake,” I think all the things associated with Taylor Swift’s Reputation era: backstabbing, cunning, viciousness, general edginess. Moving from a dragon to a snake, I was a bit worried about what this upcoming year would bring. However, in the context of the Chinese zodiac, it’s more hopeful and nuanced. The snake offers wisdom, mystery, strategy, and transformation. People born in the year of the snake give off the vibes of an Aquarius mixed with a Virgo: artsy, driven, passionate on the inside but calculated on the outside, seemingly confident and tasteful. Alternatively, they can be distant, detached, and selfish.

Your own Zodiac animal will determine how the year of the snake will look for you, but generally speaking this will be a year of shedding. Picture a snake shedding its dead skin. That. So maybe not the cutest, but still necessary and ultimately refreshing. It’s also a wood year, which brings characteristics of the active listening, loyal, contemplative/starving-artist archetype. My horoscope as a wooden pig isn’t looking particularly exciting, as it has told me to watch my health, my finances, and be patient in love, so instead, I asked myself what I’m getting out of this year’s theme.

Maybe this year we’re invited to think about what change is required for us to tap into our main character energy. This year is less about owning confidence until it feels real but, rather, using our intelligence to create smart goals and our charm to get ourselves to the finish line. Identify the area of life we want to change in, state the specific thing that needs changing, brainstorm solutions, and make an efficient plan.

The most fitting example from my own life is the wooden pig’s warning to manage physical and financial health. With both areas, I’d like to reach a point of stability. It’s hard to charm my way into abundant health and finance (if I could, I wouldn’t be in this predicament), so the year of the snake is challenging me to commit to a plan. I’m all for rapid change so, for me, shedding skin looks like staying put, feeling the discomfort of dry skin, continuing despite not knowing what I’ll look like at the end.

As a queer Asian person, the year of the snake really excites me. It makes me feel like I’m toggling between good and evil, change and stagnation. I’m equipped to charge into the year with the wisdom to know that nothing inherently always good nor inherently always bad. This Lunar New Year I can celebrate the stability I’ve found in my identities and relationships, and look forward to the stability I’ll cultivate in less abundant places.

Most importantly, harnessing the power of the snake just sounds so fucking badass.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Em Win

Originally from Toledo, Ohio, Em now lives in Los Angeles where she does many odd jobs in addition to writing. When she's not sending 7-minute voice messages to friends and family, she enjoys swimming, yoga, candle-making, tarot, drag, and talking about the Enneagram.

Em has written 81 articles for us.

1 Comment

Comments are closed.

‘RuPaul’s Drag Race’ Episode 1706 Recap: Spray Paintgate

The girls are fighting! Tensions remain high on Drag Race this week as the queens prepare for a ball. But did the drama create lifelong feuds or was it exaggerated for the promo?

But first! In the aftermath of Arriety’s save, the queens are all smiles in the work room with mixed feelings in the confessional. Lydia says she’s relieved everyone isn’t mad at her for sending home their bestie, but also she really wanted to be the one to send home tough competition. Even Kori admits that she’s as frustrated with Arriety remaining as she is happy to keep her friend. To be fair, Kori’s loyalties lie with her girlfriend Butthole above anyone else.

It’s a new day in the work room and the queens are realizing they’re six weeks in and only two queens have gone home. In recent years, this show has been less a drag race and more a never-ending road trip. But, hey, we need the distraction right now, so I’ll take it. Hormona says she thinks Sam is going to be the next to go which immediately endeared me to her. Enemy of my enemy, etc. etc. (Just kidding. To be honest, this season doesn’t really have any VILLAINS. I like some people more than others and it’s fun to root for faves, but there are no Elliot with two Ts or even Nina Wests around.)

The mini challenge this week is sponsored by Anastasia Beverly Hills so Norvina shows up to introduce it. The queens are split into two teams and have to pass lipsticks through glory holes using only their mouths. It’s fun and even more fun is seeing the queens’ goofy quick drag.

The main challenge this week is the Let’s Get Sea Sickening Ball. The first outfit is Bathing Beauties, meaning swimwear. The second outfit is Sea Creature couture, an outfit inspired by a sea creature. And the third outfit is Sea Sickening Eleganza, outfits made from upcycled trash and other materials that could be found polluting the ocean. Lexi says upcycling is what she does best, so she’s excited. I’m excited too because I love a ball, but I wish Lucky was still here for that last look!

Ru comes by to say hello to all the queens and give some feedback as well as stirring up minor drama by pushing Arriety to say Crystal should’ve been in the bottom last week instead of her. Then Lana says that she’s tired of being safe and she wants critique and Ru says, “I’ll give you some critique, your last design challenge look was unfinished and almost landed you in the bottom.”

Time for Spray Paintgate, as some of the queens call it. Basically the majority of Lexi’s outfit is made up of a blue tarp, but blue tarps are also what people often paint on. So Arriety and Onya accidentally used the outfit as a tarp while Lexi was letting it dry. The main problem is when Lexi comes into the work room upset, Onya doesn’t say anything. Then Lexi goes back outside and Arriety owns up and apologizes sending Lexi back into the work room to fight with Onya.

It does seem like Onya was just being conflict avoidant rather than lying. But I understand Lexi being upset that Onya didn’t own up right away. “Ruined my outfit” is a bit dramatic because she just had to repaint or paint the other side. Then again, they have very limited time.

Luckily, after a good night’s sleep, Lexi has shaken of the setback. She asks Arriety and Onya if she can talk to them and it’s clear Onya is expecting more fighting, but then Lexi apologizes for overreacting and Onya apologizes again too. I like everyone involved so I’m pleased this didn’t actually result in that much drama.

In a better mood, Lexi starts gossiping with Sam about whose outfits look worst. They say Acacia’s looks like it has baked potato titties to which my girlfriend said, “that sounds great! I love potatoes and titties.” Can’t argue with that.

The guest judge this week is Hunter Schafer! And if that wasn’t exciting enough Law Roach is back as a mainstay judge! Even though Hunter’s stylist is Dara Allen, I’m sure she knows Law from being around Zendaya so much. In addition to Law and Hunter being good judges, it just seems like they’re having such a good time and Michelle and Ru are feeding off that too.

There are A LOT of outfits this week and if you’re reading this I assume you’ve watched and are more interested in analysis than descriptions so o I’m just going to share the ones I had thoughts about:

  • Lydia’s four penis bulge didn’t totally work for me, but I did appreciate the reclaiming of the gender-nonconforming bulge in a bikini look
  • Obsessed with Suzie’s Lucille Ball in male drag look especially the orange mustache connected to her hair
  • The sand handprint and water shoes are cute but Lana’s swimsuit look is way too simple
  • Jewels’ Spanish dancer sea slug look was one of my favorites of the night
  • I really liked Sam’s unconventional approach to viper fish
  • Onya’s African sea star was great and if there was something on the hands or arms it would’ve been near the top for me
  • Arriety’s lion fish was the look of the night with fabric that flowed like it was in water
  • Crystal’s tight pink lemonade dress isn’t the most exciting look, but it’s super polished and I was very impressed given the materials they had to work with
  • I loved Jewels’ red and black look — the uneven shoulder and hip fabric often doesn’t work for me, but it really did here
  • I did not have high expectations for Sam’s trash bag gown when it was on the mannequin and it looked truly excellent on her
  • Suzie as Amelia Earhart really tickled me
  • Lexi sold her big tarp look — the best walk and energy if not the very best design

Overall, my top three would be Arriety, Sam, and Jewels with Suzie and Lexi as runner ups. But I didn’t get to decide so instead of Jewels the third person was Crystal. A totally fair pick even if I don’t find her as fun.

The bottom is Acacia, Hormona, and Lana. Michelle tells Hormona she played it safe and Law tells Lana he wants to see her stand with more confidence.

Arriety wins! And Acacia is safe! Hormona and Lana lip sync to “get him back” by Olivia Rodrigo. (Fun fact: Olivia Rodrigo was six years old when the first season of Drag Race aired.) It’s not an incredible lip sync, but I thought they both did a really solid job.

But I do think it was Hormona’s time to go. I’m glad she was saved and got to show more of her drag, but this is a strong season. In fact, all three bottom queens this week feel like they have one foot out the door. Unless this bottom placement lights something up inside Lana. That’s my hope!

Teleport Us to Mars!! Here Are Some Random Thoughts:

+ Calling scandals something-gate has become a pet peeve of mine because U.S. presidents alone have done worse things than Watergate since Nixon. Especially Reagan. Like what about spray paint-contra?? But also I titled this recap so I’m part of the problem. God I hate Ronald Reagan.

+ Arriety reveals she has a 17 tattoo.

+ Jewels says she has webbed toes.

+ Sam’s godfather is Charles Barkley???

+ Queen I’m rooting for: Arriety

+ Queen I’m horniest for: Arriety

+ Queen I want to sashay: Sam

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Drew Burnett Gregory

Drew is a Brooklyn-based writer, filmmaker, and theatremaker. She is a Senior Editor at Autostraddle with a focus in film and television, sex and dating, and politics. Her writing can also be found at Bright Wall/Dark Room, Cosmopolitan UK, Refinery29, Into, them, and Knock LA. She was a 2022 Outfest Screenwriting Lab Notable Writer and a 2023 Lambda Literary Screenwriting Fellow. She is currently working on a million film and TV projects mostly about queer trans women. Find her on Twitter and Instagram.

Drew Burnett has written 662 articles for us.

2 Comments

  1. I’m about to throw hands if Jewels doesn’t get a top placement soon, she is so fun and funny in the werkroom and always turns it out on the runway!!

  2. A major step-up by Arriety. That Lion Fish, dayum…

    Is it really all sweetness and light towards Onya by Lexi . . . or by anybody else? I have a feeling that that there may have been forgiving, but not forgetting (for Onya’s 2nd transgression re someone else’s outfit, but really, for failing to own it In. Front. Of. Everyone. I like Onya’s drag, but… ).

    You surprise me, Drew, for failing to notice, in “UnTucked”, what Jewels said to Hunter: [para.] “I saw you [your life, basically] and thought, ‘that’s something I…” {abrupt stop}. In short, I think Jewels ALMOST came out as trans there. [I wasn’t familiar w/ Hunter, FWIW (too poor for streaming here). HOT FISH!]

Comments are closed.

How Am I Supposed To Feel About the Ceasefire?

feature image photo by Hassan Jedi/Anadolu via Getty Images

In January 2024, I woke every morning as I had for the previous two months with only one priority: to scroll. For hours, I sat in bed or on the couch or in a café or on the subway and scrolled, hoping to zoom past good news on what was happening in Gaza and greater Palestine. It didn’t matter if I was sitting at a dinner table with loved ones, either. My attention was rarely on them; it was always on my phone and the never-ending stream of terrible news. Every night, I would fall asleep to the same prayer: Please let there be a ceasefire in Palestine tomorrow. Please, please protect every person in Gaza. Please let them live in health and safety and bring the Palestinian people justice. It was the kind of obsessive prayer I used to murmur to myself as a child: Please keep my family safe, specifically my mom and dad and also my two brothers — my older and younger — and my big sister, and my cousins, all of my cousins — my first, second, and third cousins — and my grandparents, all four of them. I was so nervous that if I did not name the people I was praying for, God would forget them, or worse, do something to hurt them.

And so, in the days and weeks following Israel’s relentless genocidal campaign, I prayed with specificity for a ceasefire, for justice, for safety, health, and protection for all the Palestinian people living through this latest bombardment.

In the slim moment between my alarm going off and me already beginning to rouse for the morning, right before I grabbed my phone to resume my scrolling, I would take a deep breath and continue the prayer I had fallen asleep to. If I didn’t yet see the news, the possibility that everything changed overnight could exist. My prayers might have worked and a gap of hopeful, desperate, reality would bloom. As my magical thinking took hold, I felt what I believed it would feel like to receive the news that a true and lasting ceasefire was in place. It was a version of elation. It was a version of joy. Mostly, it was some kind of relief that the careless murdering of children, healthcare workers, volunteers, parents, teenagers, (I could go on, you see — who have I not named? Too many.) would end and a version of justice would be served.

Of course, for well over a year, this half-waking dream never came true. During the “pause” in November 2023 which happened to coincide with America’s Thanksgiving, a glimmer of relief came as I watched eloquent Palestinian children vlog about waking up without the hum of Israeli surveillance overhead: “There are no sounds of planes. Can you guys hear? It’s a truce…but this truce is temporary, only four days…I swear life is beautiful like this, without the sounds of drones. I got so happy, I swear I got so happy.”

The moment the truce ended, the thrum of those drones and warplanes and blasts continued and for months I thought about this little boy thanking God for a four-day moment of peace and I wondered where he was and if he was still, somehow, finding moments to smile.

A year later, after establishing some boundaries with my scrolling habits, I received a handful of text messages from friends checking in to see how I was feeling with the latest news that Israel had finally agreed to a ceasefire.

“This is a loaded question” friends would begin, “but I hope you feel relief.”

I didn’t respond to these messages for a day or two, mainly because I didn’t know what I was feeling and I felt ashamed for this lack of knowing. I still do. It had been 467 days. 467 days of witnessing children carry the limbs of their loved ones. 467 days of watching “up-and-coming” Palestinian chefs teach us how they feed the hundreds of starving refugees with only a few cans of food or how they manage to clean water from the very mud on which they have been sleeping. 467 days of watching healthcare workers plead with the West that they were running out of time, out of human capacity, out of hope.

On the day the ceasefire was announced, I celebrated my Lebanese friend’s 34th birthday. In a room full of primarily Arabs in the diaspora with families hailing from Palestine, Lebanon, Egypt, Syria, and Iraq, we sat cross-legged on the floor and the couch enjoying takeout Thai food and each other’s company. Everyone was in good spirits. We spoke about Syria’s liberation and Lebanon’s induction of a new President, but the topic of Gaza and the ceasefire seemed tactfully avoided.

Toward the end of the night, when conversation had trickled off, I voiced what we had carefully edged around: “I don’t even know how I’m supposed to feel about this ceasefire. What’s going on?”

“We just don’t know if it will stick. Or what happens next,” one of them said. That was all that was said. It was all that really could be said. And the simplicity of this fact scared me.

As Arabs in the diaspora growing up in the States, especially after 9/11, we’ve become far too familiar with watching our homelands face one atrocious political hardship after the other. I know merely watching is nothing compared to living through these upheavals. I know. I know. I know. And yet, I don’t know.

What I know for certain is that no one feels comfortable with genuine optimism. Not right now, not after 467 days, and especially not after watching Israel continue to violate ceasefire agreements in both Palestine and Lebanon time and time again. While Palestinian allies may find relief in the idea of this ceasefire, unfortunately, I think we know better.

Over 560,000 Palestinians have returned to northern occupied Gaza since the announcement of the ceasefire and, yet, on February 3, authorities in Gaza claimed Israel has been stalling entry of certain aid. 60,000 caravans and 20,000 temporary tents were meant to be brought in per the ceasefire deal — how pathetic that after murdering civilians and destroying homes, schools, and hospitals Israel was meant to assist their victims with tents in replacement of proper facilities, but that’s beside the point.

All the while, Israel has continued their “offensive” efforts across the northern occupied West Bank where thousands of Palestinian families outside of Gaza have now been displaced from their homes. Mohammad Hureini, an activist in the West Bank, said “Israeli settlers launched a violent attack on the village of Susya in my community Masafer Yatta, vandalizing property, destroying vehicles and water tanks. Daily life in the West Bank has become living hell under these escalating assaults.” Within only five weeks of this calendar year, Israel has killed 70 Palestinians in the West Bank.

In a press conference on February 4, alongside Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, President Donald Trump announced a plan for the United States to take over occupied Gaza. Palestinians have “no alternative” but to leave Gaza, he said. When I watched the press conference my first reaction was to laugh at the audacity and clarity of the new President’s vision — this is ethnic cleansing.

But is this a ceasefire? No. It’s the illusion before the next wave of horror.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!
Related:

Elena Dudum

Elena Dudum is a Palestinian-Syrian writer whose work explores the boundaries of generational trauma and what it means to have an identity shaped by political narratives. As a grandchild of Palestinian refugees, her working memoir hopes to untangle the notion of “homeland” and how one can connect to this amorphous idea in the diaspora. Her personal essays on Palestine have been published in The Atlantic, TIME Magazine, Bon Appétit, and Cosmopolitan Magazine among others.

Elena has written 3 articles for us.

5 Comments

  1. Thank you for your words, and thank you @Autostraddle for continuing to cover this horrific genocide. We are all praying that at the bare minimum this ceasefire sticks, Free Palestine

  2. “President Donald Trump announced a plan for the United States to take over occupied Gaza. Palestinians have “no alternative” but to leave Gaza, he said. When I watched the press conference my first reaction was to laugh at the audacity and clarity of the new President’s vision — this is ethnic cleansing.”

    I’m only surprised anyone’s surprised. [Especially if said “anyone” sat out the election or voted for Jill Stein.]

Comments are closed.

Will She Dump Me If I Don’t Wanna Join Her Wellness Journey?

I Really, Really Don't Want to Go on a Little Walk
Q
My girlfriend just started working out and being really deliberate about her protein intake and joined a book club. She wants to go to bed early instead of watching TV after work. All of these things are so great for her and I’m honestly proud of her dedication and drive, but here’s the thing. I don’t want to work out or think about protein and I want to watch TV and go to bed when I feel like it, but she keeps inviting me to join her in these things. She brought up walking around our neighborhood after work instead of watching TV and this sounds like torture to me! How can I encourage her to keep doing what she wants but to leave me out of it, and if I do that, will it harm our relations...

Join a crew of extraordinary humans who keep Autostraddle here for everyone!  Already a member? Sign In

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

the team

auto has written 764 articles for us.

There Has Never Been a Better Time To Read About Two Girls Falling in Love at the End of the World

“Surprisingly, people don’t seem to have an appetite for dystopian literature after the end of the world.” This line from the middle of Lily Braun-Arnold’s debut YA novel, The Last Bookstore on Earth struck me as soon as I read it. Technically, we are not experiencing the end of the world, no matter how much it feels like we are. What we’re living through is more like the end of the world as we know it. But given the decisions made by our current president, an actual apocalypse doesn’t feel that far off. Braun-Arnold’s book takes place in suburban New Jersey after “The Storm,” an acid rain that wiped out thousands of people and places. The main character is Liz Flannery, a 17-year-old girl who worked in the same independent bookstore that she currently lives in. After losing her family in The Storm, she sought refuge in the bookstore, and fear of leaving the familiar shelves has kept her there for over a year. The Last Bookstore on Earth is told in real time, but there are chapters that flash back to Liz’s life in the days and months leading up to and immediately after The Storm. We learn she sheltered in the bookstore with her former co-worker and crush Eva. However, Eva had a strong need to leave and see what was left out in the world. While Liz is totally alone most of the time, the store has become a bit of an outpost for people stopping through the area. People come and leave messages or packages for loved ones who might end up passing through the area to varying degrees of success. When one of her regular passers-through tells her that a second storm is coming, Liz is thrown into a tailspin. She’s not sure the store could possibly withstand a second storm — she never fixed the damage from the first one, and she doesn’t have the resources or strength to do it by herself. But when mysterious stranger Maeve shows up thinking the bookstore is abandoned and seeking shelter, Liz begins to believe that maybe a future is possible for her. That is, if they can survive the second storm together. I admit, it’s been a long time since I’ve read a dystopian YA. Mainly because adulthood was enough of a horror-show. But as we moved into a second Trump presidency, I found myself looking for something that would mirror the feelings I was having about that. When I discovered that catalyst for the apocalypse in The Last Bookstore on Earth was acid rain, it just felt right. The book was released just as Los Angeles, where I live, began to burn. Just as the rain decimates the New Jersey Liz once knew in the book, parts of the city I call home became burned out shells of the places they once were. In the world of the novel, the California fires would be one of the harbingers of what was coming. Liz and the other characters don’t have time to pontificate about the ills of climate change and how it has changed their lives. They’re simply too busy trying to survive. They’re living in a desolate wasteland; areas are patrolled by gangs and brigades who are looking to protect the resources they have and steal others. Drinkable water has become practically forgotten. Most people have to ration food and will turn anything they can into a shelter. Liz isn’t at the bookstore because she wants to be; it’s because it’s one of the places that is still mostly standing, the one that doesn’t remind her of the family she lost. Survivor’s guilt is a huge part of Liz’s story. And how can it not be, when she was the only member of her family to make it through The Storm? The Flannerys were a good example of what I imagine many families will look like as the climate crisis continues to alter our lives. Liz’s father took the obvious warnings seriously, suggesting that the family move to Alaska where things might be a little safer. Her mother is vehemently against the idea, as is Liz’s twin sister Thea. Both her mother and sister write her father off as a conspiracy theorist who is making things worse than they are. For her part, Liz is more on her father’s side, believing that something was coming to change their lives. It takes a while before we find out what happened to Liz and her family on the day of The Storm, but we see the effects from the very first page. Liz is frozen by the choices she made that night — the anxiety hangs like a lead weight in her chest, coloring every moment of her life in the after. My heart broke for Liz; I can’t imagine what it would feel like to be the only one left. And to spend all of your time trying to figure out why. That’s the one thing she can’t wrap her mind around: Why did she survive when her whole family died? What does it say about her that she was chosen to survive? That’s what makes Liz’s initial interactions with Maeve so interesting. Everywhere Liz is soft, Maeve is hard. Maeve has had to see and do things to survive that she doesn’t want Liz to know anything about. And for a while, it’s working. The pair are learning how to be around a person again, but also attempting to make surviving the second storm more of a reality. Their feelings for each other grow from tentative to protective and loving, not only because of their situation. You can tell they see the parts of each other no one has ever seen before. Suddenly, Eva returns, throwing their plan for survival into a total tailspin. Another thing I really loved in the The Last Bookstore on Earth was the way Braun-Arnold pulled in the stories of random characters Liz encounters. They are hand-scribbled notes to show that world that these people existed, that their lives mattered before The Storm. It makes the story feel a little more alive. When you’re only hearing the thoughts of one character, the little breaks are a nice change of pace. I don’t want to give away too much; one spoiler could ruin the entire experience. But as the world feels like it’s crumbling around me, it was really nice to see two teen girls fall in love against all odds. And in a bookstore, which may feel like a random choice, but totally works in this story. Bookstores represent a lot to different people — Braun-Arnold captures the magic of your local indie bookstore so well. It’s a place of comfort, of joy…well, it’s a place you feel protected.
Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Sa'iyda Shabazz

Sa'iyda is a writer and mom who lives in LA with her partner, son and 3 adorable, albeit very extra animals. She has yet to meet a chocolate chip cookie she doesn't like, spends her free time (lol) reading as many queer romances as she can, and has spent the better part of her life obsessed with late 90s pop culture.

Sa'iyda has written 139 articles for us.

1 Comment

  1. Thank you for writing this, immediately went to scope it out on Libby. Honestly get most of my book recs from you and Kayla’s lists these days

Comments are closed.

Cozy Games for the People Who Are Already Tired of This Year

January 2025 was one of the longest years I’ve experienced, and I know I’m not the only one feeling it. Following up from last year’s game recommendations for queer relationships, here are my cozy game recommendations for starting the year.

Cozy games took center-stage during the pandemic, and they haven’t lost their popularity since. Rather than being defined by genre, cozy games are identified by vibes. They’re soft in tone and connect players to themes like friendship and cooperation. Violence is minimal (or cartoonish, at most) and players are only asked for minimal reflexes and focus.

Cozy gaming is for people who don’t want to commit to something with a vicious learning curve or a very high ticket price in hardware. Here are my favorite cozy game contenders for starting off 2025.


Cats/Dogs/Birds Organized Neatly

Cats organized neatly

What do I need to run it?

PC, Nintendo Switch

What’s the level of commitment?

About $3 for each of the games individually. Cats was the earliest release. It was followed home by Dogs, and Birds is the most recent entry. They’re usually bundled together for under $8.

What’s the vibe?

The Organized Neatly series are puzzle games with the same premise. You have a grid and a set of adorable animals in odd shapes. You have to fit them into the grid perfectly to advance to the next level. When you pick them up to put them on the grid, they make cute noises and odd facial expressions. There’s a chill soundtrack to keep your head in the game.

That’s really it. Check the trailer for Cats if you don’t believe me. If you can digest that paragraph, you know how to play the game. Each game slowly ramps up in difficulty as more complicated grids and weirder animals are introduced. Like any puzzler, there will be a point where your skills are matched, but the game is so low-stakes that there’s nothing to be frustrated over. Sometimes, I launch Cats just to rotate the little kitties around and hear them meow. Top-notch.


Spiritfarer

Spiritfarer

What do I need to run it?

PC, Mac, Linux, Nintendo Switch, PS 4, XBox One, iOS, or Android. Your work laptop should be fine.

What’s the level of commitment?

$30 and many boxes of tissues.

What’s the vibe?

Spiritfarer is a ludicrously beloved game about death. Specifically, you play the titular spiritfarer, a Charon-like persona who looks after the souls of the departed and sees to their needs before they move to the next step of the afterlife. The game has a sublime cast of anthropomorphic spirits in your care. Each day is spent maintaining your ship, running errands, and taking care of your spirit. When they’re ready, you’ll have to do the most difficult thing of all: say goodbye.

I’m dead serious about budgeting for tissues when you start this game.

The game is also a graphical charmscape. Slick animations and beautifully-drawn backgrounds give the afterlife a picture book appeal. Every bit of your ship is lovingly detailed for a grand adventure about love and loss. There’s also an adorable cat named Daffodil who follows you around and is a surprisingly competent lumberjack. The game has two player co-op for people who don’t want to cry alone (player 2 gets to be the cat).


Tiny Glade

Tiny Glade game

What do I need to run it?

PC, GeForce Now, Linux. In layperson’s terms, you’ll want a robust work machine or something else with a bit of kick.

What’s the level of commitment?

$15 to paint the 3D castle of your yearning dreams.

What’s the vibe?

A pop-up medieval town and castle builder. Pick a virtual paintbrush (walls, roofs, staircases, etc.) and just paint it onto the terrain. The game’s procedural generation (not generative AI) handles the placement and fittings automatically so you don’t have to fight over individual ledges. Tiny Glade skips that part that makes other building games frustrating by ditching the learning curve and finicky tools. All you have to do is pick a parcel of land and paint the medieval cityscape you want to see.

When you’re done, take a screenshot of your seasonally lit town and admire the computer-assisted handiwork to the playful, rustic soundtrack. There’s no resource management, conflict, or pressure in Tiny Glade. Although some would say that constitutes a lack of depth, this is a game that sets out to do one thing and does it well.

There are also itty bitty sheep that you can interact with while you build.


Spirit City: Lofi Sessions

Spirit City: Lofi Sessions

What do I need to run it?

PC, GeForce Now, your work laptop (if you’re fine with it huffing and puffing)

What’s the level of commitment?

$12 to decorate your room, adopt spirit creatures, and get some scheduling utilities for your real world.

What’s the vibe?

Well, the short version is that someone turned lofi beats girl into a game. Spirit City: Lofi Sessions is a slice-of-life game that plays out in a dream bedroom. Customize a character and decorate a perfect open plan loft. Pick everything from soundtrack to ambient lighting and watch your virtual self live a softcore life worthy of fantasy. When it gets lonesome, you can adopt a spirit creature and give it a plush bed by your side.

Mooncube Games could have stopped after making a functional game, but they understood the spirit of the source material well enough to build further. Spirit City also has optional utilities and time-management tools that tie into each user’s real life. An in-game pomodoro timer to encourage short bursts of work. A journal keeps your mind sharp and reflective. The habit tracker does the work of our stats-oriented smartwatch apps with a gentler touch.

Spirit City is a relaxed decorating game that optionally pulls double-duty as a productivity tool. After you pick your work soundtrack and ambiance for the session, it’s meant to run in the background while you’re on-task in the real world. The game rewards your efforts with new pets and decorations. It succeeds where similar productivity ‘games’ and apps fail because it’s not buried under obnoxious alarms, adverts, and in-app transactions. It’s a productivity supporter, not an enforcer.


Garden Galaxy

Garden Galaxy

What do I need to run it?

PC only. Lightweight and simple, though!

What’s the level of commitment?

$10 to start your charming isometric garden. And the next. And the next. And the next one…

What’s the vibe?

Another pick-up-and-play entry like Birds Organized Neatly. This time, you’re just popping garden plants and decorations onto the ground to kick off a new terrace. No fumbling with build tools and camera angles when everyone slides neatly into ground-level squares or slips into nearby interactables. Developed by one woman, Garden Galaxy has the charm of a board game without the vicious tableside competition.

You’re not short on content either. There are enough biomes and drops to keep anybody entertained as their project sprawls out of control. The choice to make the player adapt to random drops and plants rather than allowing us to buy whatever we please is inspired. It keeps the mind away from tight organization and nudges us toward letting the garden grow organically. It’s resource management, not budget management at its best.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!
Related:

Summer Tao

Summer Tao is a South Africa based writer. She has a fondness for queer relationships, sexuality and news. Her love for plush cats, and video games is only exceeded by the joy of being her bright, transgender self

Summer has written 63 articles for us.

2 Comments

Comments are closed.

Athletic Governing Bodies Must Resist Trump’s Unconscionable Trans Sports Ban

feature image photo by Kevin Dietsch / Staff via Getty Images

Well, in what feels like a non-stop barrage of precedents being set, we’ve truly hit an all new threshold today. Amongst a crowd of young women and girls, President Trump signed a broad-reaching Executive Order banning the participation of trans women in women’s sports. The Executive Order tactically perverts Title IX case law to argue that the actions prompted by the order are being pushed forward in order to “protect” women and girls by giving them the “equal opportunity to participate and excel in competitive sports.”

Taking its cues from a myriad of other state-wide trans sports bans, the Keeping Men Out of Women’s Sports Executive Order essentially aims to do the same thing these states have done but at the Federal level: prevent trans women from competing on women’s sports teams in any areas — such as schools, universities, district and state teams, etc. — that receive Federal or state funding of any kind. The Executive Order, like so many he’s signed in the last week, makes definitive demands but, in this case, fails to delineate which sports would be impacted by the ban, meaning it has sweeping implications for not just major sports but also minor ones like chess, darts, bowling, and cornhole. It is also aimed not only at professional sports leagues but essentially all schools that receive government funding, meaning this will impact young trans kids who just want to play sports, something all kids should have access to.

But that’s not even the biggest concern here, of course. This Executive Order is the fourth one to be signed by Trump in the last week that takes direct aim at the lives and livelihood of trans people, specifically trans women in this order. As such, it represents yet another attempt by this administration to set precedents and push forward the creation of laws that would essentially make targeted discrimination of trans people the rule of law in the U.S.


What Does Trump’s Sports Executive Order Say?

Once again, this document is a giant piece of shit dreamed up by a bunch of people who use their crusade against trans people to sow discord and confusion and further marginalize a group of people who make up less than 2% of the U.S. population.

Like the other four Executive Orders regarding trans people that he’s already signed, this one immediately — literally through the title of the order — defines trans women as men and then makes the inaccurate claim that “many educational institutions and athletic associations have allowed men to compete in women’s sports.” According to the introductory material in the order, it is designed to ensure that “it is the policy of the United States to rescind all funds from educational programs that deprive women and girls of fair athletic opportunities, which results in the endangerment, humiliation, and silencing of women and girls and deprives them of privacy. It shall also be the policy of the United States to oppose male competitive participation in women’s sports more broadly, as a matter of safety, fairness, dignity, and truth.”

From there, the order serves an entirely distorted reinterpretation of Title IX of the Education Amendments Act of 1972 by claiming Title IX was created to make sure women and girls have “equal opportunity” in competitive sports, which therefore means that the inclusion of trans women in women’s sports is a blatant violation of that law. As a result, it orders the Secretary of Education and the Attorney General “to bring regulations and policy guidance into line with the Congress’ existing demand for ‘equal athletic opportunity for members of both sexes’ by clearly specifying and clarifying that women’s sports are reserved for women” and to take action against any educational institution that “allows ‘men’” to compete in women’s sports by upholding the disciplinary actions per Title IX’s orders. More specifically, it orders that the Secretary of Education and the Attorney General should rescind any and all funding from educational institutions that “deny female students an equal opportunity to participate in sports and athletic events by requiring them, in the women’s category, to compete with or against or to appear unclothed before males.”

If that wasn’t enough to cause alarm (and piss you off), the lunacy doesn’t stop there. The order also takes aim at sport-specific governing bodies by once again making the inaccurate claim that these governing bodies “have no official position or requirements regarding trans-identifying athletes.” Because the administration has chosen to ignore that many sport-specific governing bodies actually do have positions regarding trans athletes, the order calls for a variety of different actions be taken by officials across the administration in order to address this “issue.”

It says that within 60 days, the Assistant to the President for Domestic Policy must meet with major athletic organizations, governing bodies, and “female athletes harmed by such policies” to create policies in compliance with the order and with the order’s interpretation of Title IX as well as meet with State Attorneys General “to identify best practices in defining and enforcing equal opportunities for women to participate in sports and educate them about stories of women and girls who have been harmed by male participation in women’s sports.”

The order also offers directives for the Secretary of State within that same 60 day timespan. It instructs the Secretary of State, along with the Bureau of Educational and Cultural Affairs’ Sports Diplomacy Division and the Representative of the United States of America to the United Nations, to rescind U.S. support for any international sports programs that have not instituted a similar ban and to “promote” bans on trans participation in sports in the United Nations and around the world through meetings with international athletic organizations and governing bodies. The Secretary of State is also instructed to make the International Olympic Committee amend their bylaws to definitively prevent trans women from participating in women’s sports and to ensure that women who do not meet the testosterone requirement as set out by the IOC cannot compete even if they use testosterone reduction therapies.

Startlingly, the order doesn’t stop there. One of the final parts of the order instructs the Secretary of State and the Secretary of Homeland Security to perform a witch hunt on international athletes attempting to come to the U.S. to play sports in order to make sure they aren’t “males seeking to participate in women’s sports.” It gives the Secretary of State and the Secretary of Homeland Security the permission to create provisions that would block, deny, or rescind entry to the U.S. for athletes suspected of fitting in this specification put forth by the order through the Immigration and Nationality Act.


Is Trump’s Sports Executive Order Legal?

Yet another situation where I must ask — does this sound legal to you? Because it shouldn’t. Of course this isn’t legal. This is absurdity wrapped in the guise of “common sense.”

This is a flagrant violation of our right to protection under the law as granted by the Fourteenth Amendment. Further, contrary to whatever devious interpretation this document is putting forth, it is a glaring violation of Title IX, which is part of the Fourteenth Amendment, because Title IX says “No person in the United States shall, on the basis of sex, be excluded from the participation in, be denied the benefits of, or be subjected to discrimination under any education program or activity receiving Federal financial assistance.” As we’ve said in these articles before, this Executive Order will for sure face legal pushback through the courts (and possibly Congress).

However, unlike the other Executive Orders aimed at trans people, this one is unique in that trans participation in sports bans have already gained bipartisan support around the country and in the Federal government. Although Republicans have led the charge, the conversation on trans participation in sports has historically been hotly debated amongst Democrats in both the House and the Senate, with the Biden administration completely abandoning its plans to push forth new protections for trans athletes in 2024. Just last month, the House passed a bill known as the “Protection of Women and Girls in Sports Act” that seeks to amend Title IX to recognize a person’s “sex” “based solely on a person’s reproductive biology and genetics at birth.” The bill passed by a small margin but still needed Democratic support to win, which it did get from two House Democrats.

And perhaps equally unsurprisingly, it took basically no time for the NCAA, the organization that mediates and controls collegiate athletics — and a non-profit organization that is NOT Federally funded — to put out the following statement through its president, known coward Charlie Baker: “We strongly believe that clear, consistent, and uniform eligibility standards would best serve today’s student-athletes instead of a patchwork of conflicting state laws and court decisions. To that end, President Trump’s order provides a clear, national standard.” The statement proves, once again, that the NCAA is less interested in their student-athletes than they consistently pretend to be.

However, other organizational leaders did take time today to stand up against the order. Fatima Goss Graves, president and CEO of the National Women’s Law Center, issued the following statement after the Executive Order was signed: “Contrary to what the president wants you to believe, trans students do not pose threats to sports, schools, or this country, and they deserve the same opportunities as their peers to learn, play and grow up in safe environments. The far-right’s disturbing obsession with controlling the bodies, hearts, and minds of our country’s youth harms all students. Rather than protecting women and girls, sports bans harm any of us who do not conform to someone else’s idea of what a woman or girl should look, dress, or act like. Policymakers should instead focus on ending the enormous disparity that remains in sports opportunities for women and girls and equally funding women’s and girls’ teams. And schools and sports governing bodies should stand firmly against implementing this unlawful executive order and ensure every student has an opportunity to play. We stand with trans students and will continue to fight back against attacks on their rights.”

While it’s hard to say what the fate of this particular Executive Order and the “Protection of Women and Girls in Sports Act” will be exactly, these attempts to prevent trans people from participating in sports have a lot of detractors aiming to continue taking action against them.


As we’ve said here many times before: Executive Orders are NOT laws, which means no one legally has to comply with anything they’re saying. Unfortunately, we also know that early compliance and unfettered agreement with the order is what truly threatens to sow further chaos and disorder in our educational and athletic institutions right now.

As a trans and genderless athlete who’s had to make concessions about how I participate in competitive powerlifting due to the United States Powerlifting Associations rules about trans participation in the sport, I know this Executive Order is just going to give these sports-specific governing bodies who already have policies aimed at trans participation in their sports more fuel to enforce them. We’re already seeing it in that statement issued by the NCAA, which is undoubtedly one of the largest governing bodies in sports in this country. With the other Executive Orders, it seems much easier to say that compliance — whether it happens now or when/if these orders become laws — should be avoided at all costs. But I’ll continue saying it even for this. Anyone involved in any institution that’s attempting to engage and comply with these orders should be fighting back at all costs.

I mentioned in this piece that part of this order is trying to restrict travel for international athletes coming into this country. That paired with what we’ve already seen regarding the issuance of appropriate documentation for trans people in this country makes the administration’s aims very clear: They want complete and total control over what trans people do or try to do in every facet of their lives. No cis person who considers themselves “righteous” or an “ally” should be upholding these precedents even if it is a risk to be defiant. I recognize my position might be viewed as harsh or totalizing, but the only way we’ll be able to move forward is if people start standing up wherever they are.


Read more about trans participation in sports:

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Stef Rubino

Stef Rubino is a writer, community organizer, competitive powerlifter, and former educator from Ft. Lauderdale, FL. They're currently working on book of essays and preparing for their next powerlifting meet. They’re the fat half of the arts and culture podcast Fat Guy, Jacked Guy, and you can read some of their other writing in Change Wire and in Catapult. You can also find them on Twitter (unfortunately).

Stef has written 125 articles for us.

1 Comment

Comments are closed.

We Need More Movies Like ‘Jupiter Ascending’

Recently, writer Emily St. James took to Letterboxd to review Speed Racer and observed that “Iron Man (a movie I really like!) eating this movie’s lunch at the box office increasingly feels like a ‘two roads diverged in a wood’ moment for, like, human civilization.” A similar phenomenon transpired seven years after Speed Racer when directors Lana and Lilly Wachowski, Jupiter Ascending. After this Mila Kunis/Channing Tatum feature was delayed seven months from its original July 2014 release date, Jupiter Ascending debuted the same year as Star Wars: The Force Awakens.

In 2015, audiences firmly chose which vision of sci-fi cinema they wanted on the big screen. The Force Awakens became the biggest movie of all time domestically. Jupiter Ascending, meanwhile, crashed and burned over its first weekend. Critics trashed it while the Golden Raspberry Awards (one year after delivering tired transphobic jokes to announce various Transformers: Age of Extinction nominations) bestowed upon it six nominations, including Worst Picture and Worst Director.

Sci-fi originality lost the cinematic war that year. For the next decade, revivals of old properties treating every familiar piece of 70s/80s nostalgia with excessive reverence dominated pop culture. Ghostbusters: Afterlife, Bladerunner: 2049, Men in Black: International, Alien: Romulus, and so many more have replayed the hits and digitally resurrected the dead. Lana Wachowski even skewered this phenomenon with The Matrix Resurrections in 2021! The increased reliance on yesteryear and fan service makes it easier to appreciate Jupiter Ascending a decade later. Yes, it’s a jagged, messy movie, but that’s just the kind of thing we need more of in pop culture.

Since Jupiter Ascending’s release, CinemaSins-style nitpickers have taken over the culture. Obsessions with Rotten Tomatoes scores and “plot holes” have suffocated any discussion of ambiguity or storytelling adhering to visual impulses rather than the laws of reality. The ubiquity of generative A.I. even seems to stem from wanting to “iron out flaws” in art. No wonder something like Jupiter Ascending repelled so many on its initial release. Here was a feature gladly reveling in spectacular imagery related to coronation ceremonies and Tatum in zero-gravity boots zooming around an Earthbound city.

“Plot holes” are there, sure, but the imagery on-screen is so stirring it’s hard to care. Such visuals service a bonkers saga chronicling ordinary Earthling Jupiter Jones (Kunis) discovering she’s actually intergalactic royalty that technically owns the Earth. Hordes of bees help her make this revelation while the half-man/half-dog Caine Wise (Tatum) is always by her side. Gigantic lizards chase after our heroes. A prominent character is introduced engaging in a zero-gravity orgy. And don’t forget a dramatic third-act moment is punctuated by an elephant alien bellowing their trunk in fear. It’s all cosmic nonsense often tripping up over exposition and lore.

This material also radiates originality and creative conviction that’s easier to appreciate ten years later. Jupiter Ascending is many things, including flawed. It’s not, however, just resurrecting dead actors through CGI to recreate scenes from decades-old movies. This is an unabashedly original work containing a scope that makes The Matrix look like it could fit inside a petri dish. In early 2015, it was easy to dismiss Jupiter Ascending as nonsense too wrapped up in its own mythos. Cut to 2025 and we’re staring down the barrel of ANOTHER Jurassic Park legacy sequel. Suddenly, a movie like Jupiter Ascending overflowing with fresh lore previously unseen sounds dandy.

You know what else aged like fine wine in this movie? Eddie Redmayne’s performance as the nefarious Balem Abrasax. Even if you don’t usually like his on-screen work, chances are you’ll appreciate his bizarre style of speaking where he constantly whispers and then sporadically shouts SO! LOUDLY!! More importantly, Balem Abrasax graced movie theater screens just before a deluge of blockbuster villains that amounted to hastily assembled pixels and glowering frowns. Suicide Squad, Black Adam, It: Chapter Two, Eternals, Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire, the list goes on and on of post-2015 blockbusters culminating in generic CG villains tormenting live-action protagonists.

Redmayne in Jupiter Ascending, meanwhile, is a fully tangible foe. He’s a flesh-and-blood person making striking choices as an actor. Everything from his richly-textured costumes to his boldly distinct vocal flourishes radiate somebody committing to grand swings. It’s not a character that will work for everyone, but such audacity will be rewarding for many viewers. In an age of CG blockbuster foes that elicit shrugs from most, this villain is at least memorable!

It’s also fantastic that Abrasax, like the baddies of The Matrix and Speed Racer before him, is another Wachowski antagonist explicitly defined as evil because of his loyalty to capitalism and societal norms. “My mother made me understand that every human society is a pyramid and that some lives will always matter more than others,” Abrasax remarks at one point. “It is better to accept this than to pretend it isn’t true.” His rhetoric sounds like it could’ve come from an average Elon Musk or Mark Zuckerberg social media post.

Jupiter Ascending defines evil with opulence. Opposing this cosmic 1%-er is a working-class woman (and, per her opening voice-over narration, an undocumented immigrant in America). Most blockbusters from the last decade bend over backward to find “good” CEOs, politicians, and agents of the state. Jupiter Ascending, meanwhile, centers its entire plot on Abrasax’s wicked indifference to genocide in the name of personal gain.

Redmayne’s Abrasax character is a microcosm of what makes Jupiter Ascending so interesting and compelling ten years later. This is an erratic, messy movie that hasn’t even cultivated the cult followings of other Wachowski movies. Isn’t it a miracle that trans women got such a big canvas to make something that wasn’t perfect? Wouldn’t it be lovely if trans folks got more opportunities to make flawed or messy art rather than constantly worrying if one shortcoming will inspire all trans people to get jettisoned from pop culture?

Two months after Jupiter Ascending’s opening, Caitlyn Jenner came out as a trans woman. This along with a new wave of “bathroom bill” hysteria (partially driven by GOP lawmakers needing a new queer boogeyman after gay marriage’s legalization) inspired a new kind of decade of trans existence in American pop culture. Trans lives were more visible than before, but there was also a new level of constant surveillance to prevent transness and gender fluidity from getting any more normalized. The very concept of trans women swimmers generated idiotic right-wing pearl-clutching. Meanwhile, trans kids have experienced relentless demonization from both sides of the political aisle. Even rich trans folks like Jenner joined in on horrific rhetoric targeting trans athletes and working-class people.

Navigating all that is a nightmare. Sometimes it feels like the only option for modern trans existence is to be a perfectly model citizen. But trans people are just people. We’re messy. Dramatic. Imperfect. Jupiter Ascending, for one fleeting moment, offered a glimpse into a different timeline. Here, trans artists regularly receive big budgets to make goofy messy sci-fi nonsense that’s not interested in winning over cis critics.

Jupiter Ascending’s fascinations lie in realizing the jagged yet passionate imagination of the Wachowski sisters. The concept of Channing Tatum playing a half-man/half-dog that also has massive angel wings, for instance, is utter madness. Having Mila Kunis subsequently softly whisper to Tatum “I love dogs, I’ve always loved dogs,” even more so. It’s all bound to make people go “WTF?,” a response so many trans artists never get the chance to evoke. As 2024 trans cinema hits like I Saw the TV Glow or The People’s Joker imaginatively epitomized, trans art doesn’t have to be perfect or resonate with every single person to be worthy of admiration. There is meaning in the messiest corners of art.


Jupiter Ascending is streaming on Max.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Lisa Laman

Lisa Laman is a life-long movie fan, writer, and Rotten Tomatoes-approved critic located both on the autism spectrum and in Texas. Given that her first word was "Disney", Lisa Laman was "doomed" from the start to be a film geek! In addition to writing feature columns and reviews for Collider, her byline has been seen in outlets like Polygon, The Mary Sue, Fangoria, The Spool, and ScarleTeen. She has also presented original essays related to the world of cinema at multiple academic conferences, been a featured guest on a BBC podcast, and interviewed artists ranging from Anna Kerrigan to Mark Wahlberg. When she isn’t writing, Lisa loves karaoke, chips & queso, and rambling about Carly Rae Jepsen with friends.

Lisa has written 17 articles for us.

7 Comments

  1. I was really confused by people’s reactions to this movie because all the marketing for it was like, watch mila kunis have a whirlwind romance with a flying wolf man also there are rocket boots and explosions. And then the movie delivered kunis, a flying wolf man, rocket boots, and explosions and people were like, I can’t believe i was tricked into watching a movie with mila kunis, a flying wolf man, rocket boots, and explosions!!!!! How terrible!!!!

    This movie promised a very specific thing and it delivered its very specific thing and then people got mad that it was in fact about this very specific thing and not some other thing movie critics were imagining.

    There might not be a cult following for jupiter ascending but it did inspire some banger fanfictions. So at least there’s that.

  2. I saw Jupiter Ascending in the theater, I think opening weekend, and I loved it so, so much. Hard to believe it was 10 years ago.

    I actually remember, at the time, comparing to the first Star Wars movie (A New Hope), saying both movies were objectively bad but subjectively great. And I stand by that – yes, Jupiter Ascending has plot holes and lacks character development, but that’s the nature of the genre! The plot and characters work on a metaphorical and mythological level and the whole thing is beautiful and so much fun.

  3. Okay so this has finally as nothing else has made me want to watch Jupiter Ascending! AND, right, how have they made people tired of dinosaurs! i love dinosaurs i love B movies but if they release another jurassic world i will SCREAM

  4. First of all, love the article, and totally respect your experience.
    As for JupAsc, maybe i should have watched it in cinema. When i tried to watch it later as a stream, twice, i fell asleep, twice. And that’s coming from someone who watches basically all scifi, loves trash, was really open to the experience as fun trash.
    The visuals don’t shine so much on a small screen and the structural problems become more prominent. This film is loooong. It is also confusing. Somehow it never really kicks in. Or rather i got lost on the transition from earth to space.
    The only thing that stayed with me was Mila Kunis cleaning toilet, and i salute the Wachowkys for that, unironically. Realistic female working class in a scifi context, only EEAAO did that similarly, i think.
    Anyways, maybe i will give it a 3rd try..

Comments are closed.

How To Create the Ultimate Solo BDSM Experience

feature image by THEPALMER via Getty Images

Imagine this: a setting so perfectly tailored to your desires that it feels as if you’ve stepped into a dreamscape. If you can’t whisk yourself away to a villa in Mykonos, a beach house on an island, or even an apartment in France with huge windows overlooking the Seine, then bring that fantasy into your own space. This is the long road to ecstasy, not some quick-fix route. There are no shortcuts here, no rushing to the finish line. This is about savouring every moment, every sensation, and indulging yourself in a deeply intimate and fulfilling solo BDSM journey, which yes is totally achievable and can be a way to explore new interests or kinks even if you don’t have a partner to play with.

The Foreplay of the Day

Foreplay doesn’t begin when you’re finally in bed or sprawled out in your chosen space. It starts earlier in the day. Show yourself love throughout your daily routine: — affirm your beauty, strength, and desirability. Let go of negative energy; don’t allow it to take root in your body or mind. Take time to connect with yourself mentally and emotionally, building a sense of self-love that will ripple into your physical experience.

Setting the Stage for Pleasure

Create the atmosphere. It’s not just a background detail; it’s part of the experience. Adjust the thermostat to your ideal climate, maybe warm and breezy, like the tropics, or cool like a crisp autumn evening. Turn on your humidifier, add your favourite fragrance to the air, and softly dim the lights. Gather your tools of pleasure: candles for ambiance, your choice of lube, and your favourite toys. If wax play is your thing, prepare your candles; if nipple clamps, electric stimulation, or if a whip what your desire demands to see and feel, ensure they are near. This is your canvas, and you are the artist making a masterpiece of sensual delight. Without underestimating the power of sound, make a playlist that stirs your soul: sensual beats mixed with moody instrumentals, or perhaps the sound of ocean waves or rainfall. Or maybe it’s moans from a favourite erotic clip. In any case, whatever sets this in motion, your body and head should feel ready as part of your preparation ritual.

Touch Every Inch of You

Now it’s time. The mood is set, the location perfect, and your accessories within reach. Begin slowly, pacing yourself. Glide your hands or oil or scented lube over your skin,  goosebumps creating a temporary ribbed luster against your skin.  The sensation awakens every inch of your body. Don’t rush. Breathe deeply, enjoying the connection to yourself. Caress your arms, your thighs, your belly, eyes closed. Let each stroke give birth to the surrender,  a reminder of your beauty and your worth.

Feel the urge rising? Good. Let it build, but don’t give in yet. Instead, reach for your toys. Maybe you’ll start with electric nipple clamps, feeling the rush of stimulation as the current heightens sensitivity. Safely tie one hand to the bed or another surface to heighten the sense of restraint and surrender. With your free hand, pour hot wax onto your belly and thighs, by now you are moaning softly as the skin tingles with intense warmth. Let the wax harden without peeling it off; let it be there, the telling of your body.

Next, take your whip. You’ll start off so soft, soft as a feather, teasing on your nerve endings, then build it up-slow, light taps escalating to harder strokes. Feel the tension-release in you from every strike rippling, blurring deliciously the boundary between pleasure and pain.

Denial of the Release

By now, the body is hot from anticipation, asking for more. Perhaps you reach for your vibrator, its hum drawing you closer to the edge. Or maybe you cue up a porno clip that complements the moment, letting moans mix with your own. But here’s the rub: Just before you come, stop. Breathe. Let the wave of pleasure recede and build again. The second orgasm, belated but inevitable, will wipe you out in the most glorious way.

Perhaps you wait for your partner, with whom you can share that climactic moment. There’s beauty in holding space for yourself, but also in connecting with another. Either way, the choice is yours.

Your Cup of Tea

So, what is your cup of tea? Are you the type who needs the right setting — candles, views, playlists — or do you feed off spontaneity, letting the mood take you wherever it will? Do you savour the satisfaction of finishing solo, or do you prefer the intimacy of finishing with a partner? Whatever your preferences, the key to it all is to honour yourself. The descriptions above are suggested guidance but are not prescriptive; you can take, leave, or adapt to suit your own desires. Take the long road, enjoy the journey, and revel in the ultimate solo BDSM experience.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!
Related:

Carlo

Carlo Kui is an award-winning Kenyan poet, writer, seasoned Public Relations professional and Psychologist in training. With three self-published books and a decade-long journey in the literary world, her work fearlessly explores themes of love, identity, and empowerment. Carlo’s bold, evocative voice and dynamic stage performances have earned her recognition for her unique, dionysiac style. A feminist and advocate for body positivity, gender equality, and mental health, Carlo intertwines her passion for human rights with the joys and challenges of motherhood. Her writing inspires readers to embrace their authenticity and live boldly.

Carlo has written 2 articles for us.

Baby Steps #6: The Best Laid Birth Plans

Sometimes you don’t know what you don’t know until you know it — and if there is anything I can say about the six-hour Prenatal & Birthing class we attended, in two separate sessions, this past Saturday and the Saturday prior, it is that it turns out there was a lot I didn’t know. And now I am basically a midwife? Which is great because Gretchen is really tired of being pregnant and would like to give birth immediately.
Whatever Happened to Lamaze Classes?
I’d imagined the class would resemble the "Lamaze classes" I’d seen on television, but it turns out  Lamaze, a psychoprophylactic method popularized in the 1950s by an apparently very mean French OB, has fallen out of favor since its peak circa my own birth. But the basic jist of it, ...

Join a crew of extraordinary humans who keep Autostraddle here for everyone!  Already a member? Sign In

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!
Related:

Riese

Riese is the 43-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3298 articles for us.

No Filter: I Think We Can All Agree the Grammys Belonged to Doechii

feature image by Kevin Mazur / Contributor via Getty Images

Hello and welcome back to No Filter! This is the place where I grab all of the best content from celesbian Instagram and throw it here for your enjoyment — yes, I am a Saint, and no, I never stop giving. Let’s go!


The only person I want to see interviewing today’s best music artists is absolutely a realtor slash reality star from LA! I truly love Chrishell so much, but like, when you put it that way, it does make the head tilt, doesn’t it?


To me? This rocks! It’s like Billy Flynn meets Ursusla? Hold on, I might be onto something, style wise!


Sometimes when I look at Victoria I just laugh cause like…okay! Leave some fine for the rest of us???


Look, I can’t get over Doechii’s performance either but didn’t your boo perform too???


Oh would you look at that, she did!


Back to Doechii, I love this video and I love her!


A sighting of Queen Latifah and that gorgeous caramel silk press makes the Grammy’s worth it every time!


The way I instantly clocked this as a Leuchtturm1917 and had to watch everyone making their little Moleskin jokes on Twitter…please, leave it to the real notebook lovers!


St. Vincent gagged me with the wife ruveal, I’ll say that! Something about real g’s and moving in silence!


I am soooo sorry to say this, in fact I really hate that I am about to but: That cat is too human, I believe he knows too much, he won’t tell us because he believes humanity is damned. SCARY!


UMMMM did anyone?? Run??? Into??? Laurie??? At Henrietta Hudson??

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Christina Tucker

Christina Tucker is writer and podcaster living in Philadelphia. Find her on Twitter or Instagram!

Christina has written 319 articles for us.

1 Comment

  1. Leuchtturm1917 sighting YES! People, expand your mind from the Moleskine! A better way is out there and Chappell Roan is here to show you!

Comments are closed.

‘In the Summers’ Is a Different Kind of Queer Coming-of-Age Story

This review of In the Summers was originally published as part of our Sundance 2024 coverage


Vicente is in his car outside the small airport of Las Cruces, New Mexico waiting for his kids. He’s nervous. His hands are shaking. He smokes to calm himself or just to have something to do. The flight attendant exits the airport with his two kids, tomboy Violeta and girly Eva, and he does his best to shift into father mode.

The movie shifts too. This opening moment is one of the few we’re with Vicente, the rest alternating between Violeta and Eva. This brief glimpse will endear us to him even as he hurts his kids. We’ll know he cares. We’ll know he’s trying his best. But it doesn’t ease the hurt. It might even make it worse.

Alessandra Lacorazza’s debut feature, In the Summers, is split into four sections, four summers where Vicente’s kids visit from California. The film spans over a decade as Violeta and Eva are played by three different actors.

Even as a child, it’s obvious Violeta is queer. But her dynamic with her father and her sister and the rest of the world is as complicated as queer existence often is in life. Vicente has a respect for Violeta, a clear favoritism built on their shared masculinity — even though he still has homophobic outbursts. It’s Eva who faces the most rejection from her father, even as it’s Eva who is most desperate for his love.

It’s also not as simple as Violeta being masculine and Eva being feminine. Especially as they get older, those lines are blurred as Eva evolves into her own kind of tomboy. Violeta is more emotional while Eva is hardened. Eva skateboards and excels at pool and both Violeta and Eva attach to local dyke bartender Carmen.

The greatest strength of In the Summers are these well-written, realistic, complicated characters and watching how the change — or don’t — and how their relationships change — or don’t — over time. Lacorazza’s sharp writing is paired with several excellent performances including Réné Pérez Joglar (aka rapper Residente) as Vicente, Emma Ramos as Carmen, Leslie Grace as Vicente’s girlfriend Yenny, and Lío Mehiel and Sasha Calle as the eldest versions of Violeta and Eva.

But it’s the middle versions of Violeta and Eva who are the heart of the film — old enough to be fully aware, young enough to leave down some of their defenses. Allison Salinas and Kimaya Thais give phenomenal performances that are a testament to their burgeoning talents and Lacorazza’s talent as a director.

Each part opens with a video still life marking the next chapter. It’s a nice cinematic flourish and I wish the film had more like it. In the Summers is at its best when it supports its writing and performances with a clear form — a sweaty party in shallow focus, an accident lost in darkness. Too often the film falls back on a flat naturalism that doesn’t quite fit with its snapshot memory structure.

Nevertheless, this is a film that prioritizes character and that is where it excels. Watching Mehiel and Calle synthesize Violeta and Eva’s childhoods into their adult selves recalled the last chapter of Moonlight — pretty much the highest compliment I can give.

When we leave Violeta and Eva they’re in their early 20s, still so young. They each have so much growth left to stumble through, so many more chapters to live. In the Summers is a queer coming-of-age movie that understands childhood and adolescence are just the beginning — our memories shape us for the rest of our lives.


In the Summers is now streaming on Hulu.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!
Related:

Drew Burnett Gregory

Drew is a Brooklyn-based writer, filmmaker, and theatremaker. She is a Senior Editor at Autostraddle with a focus in film and television, sex and dating, and politics. Her writing can also be found at Bright Wall/Dark Room, Cosmopolitan UK, Refinery29, Into, them, and Knock LA. She was a 2022 Outfest Screenwriting Lab Notable Writer and a 2023 Lambda Literary Screenwriting Fellow. She is currently working on a million film and TV projects mostly about queer trans women. Find her on Twitter and Instagram.

Drew Burnett has written 662 articles for us.

Hundreds Protest NYU Langone’s Early Compliance With Trump’s Dangerous Anti-Trans Executive Order

Three weeks from now, I’ll be getting a gender-affirming surgery from NYU Langone. For trans people in New York City, NYU Langone has a reputation as one of the best — if not the best — places to receive trans-related healthcare in the city.

I’m also an NYU alumni and, during my time at the university, I learned the unfortunate truth that the entire organization is a microcosm for the country at large. There might be great faculty, great surgeons, great opportunities, but they are overshadowed by an infrastructure that exists to reward the most powerful and uphold conservative values. The latest example of these practices occurred this week when NYU Langone CEO Robert I. Grossman made the cowardly choice to comply with Trump’s illegal anti-trans executive order even though it has not been enforced by any legislation yet, halting healthcare at NYU Langone to trans people under 19 years old, effective immediately.

Hundreds of people gathered last night at St. Vartan Park a block away from NYU Langone hospital to protest this decision. Organized by NYC-DSA, speakers included teachers, doctors, and several young trans people speaking on behalf of themselves and their peers.

Many people pointed out that Grossman’s decision is in violation of New York state anti-discrimination law. But Clark Wolff Hamel, acting executive director of PFLAG NYC, made sure that this talking point didn’t distract from the larger issue. “Institutions in New York have a legal obligation to comply with state law and ignore this heinous executive order,” he said. “But trans young people are not just in New York and regardless of their protections they deserve the right to live, they deserve the right to this healthcare. These executive orders are not just illegal and unconstitutional, they are inhumane.”

Dr. Michael Zingman, a second year child psychiatry fellow at NYU Langone representing the Committee of Interns and Residents, echoed this sentiment. “This decision is not only a moral and medical failure — it’s a betrayal of our patients and our profession,” he said. “By gutting this care, NYU is sending a message. They do not care about patient autonomy, they do not care about evidence-based medicine, and they do not care about the doctors they train.”

Pigeon, one of the young trans people who spoke and a member of NYU Students for a Democratic Society, made the astute point of connecting this decision with broader NYU practices. “NYU has long held with its participation in war profiteering and genocide that the lives of children are less a priority than the lining of its own pockets,” Pigeon said. “This latest decision is yet another extension of this sentiment.”

Beth Boyle Machlan, a faculty member at NYU and mother of a trans man, also connected this decision to a broader culture at NYU. “Over the last 18 months, I’ve watched my workplace devolve into a militarized zone of walls and checkpoints, a place where students and faculty are punished for free speech and frozen out of decision-making,” she said before stating that she still hadn’t imagined this sort of direct attack on trans people. “NYU Langone, a facility that reported over one billion in profits in 2023, announced to the world that dollars and donors are more important than healthcare.”
She went on to discuss the gap between NYU’s reputation and the reality: “So many people come from all over the world to NYU because they believe at the heart of Greenwich Village, so close to Stonewall, they can finally and safely be themselves.”

Molly, a trans freshman at NYU, spoke of this directly, saying, “One of the reasons I actually chose to go to NYU was specifically because they were known for how accessible their gender-affirming care program was to their students.” She went on to say that her disillusionment with NYU has included an education on their history: “There’s precedent for NYU’s behavior too with NYU refusing to allow students to fundraise for gay rights leading to the occupation of Weinstein Hall in 1970 which ended with the Sylvia Rivera being dragged out by the NYPD on NYU’s watch.”

“I may be young myself,” Molly also said, “But I still didn’t have access to those resources at that young of an age and because of that it led me down a path of testosterone-fueled puberty. Irreversible damage, as some may call it. No trans child should have to go through that.” In addition to having my favorite zinger of the night referencing Abigail Shrier’s transphobic book, Molly also made an excellent point. People are quick to discuss the imagined harm of cis kids having a trans puberty, but not the very real harm of trans kids having a cis puberty.

Another young trans person, Lorelai, spoke about the impact of a different anti-trans Trump executive order. In reference to receiving a passport with an X gender marker, they said, “When I received it in the mail, it was one of the happiest days of my life.” As someone who has thought about gender markers primarily as a safety issue — more concerned with a trans person’s documents not matching their appearance — I was moved and changed by Lorelai’s words. “To most people it’s just a letter on a document,” they continued, “but to me it’s a legal recognition of my existence. Having that X meant I was recognized as a human, not just a political issue and talking point.”

Lorelai then spoke about the direct impact of NYU Langone’s decision: “My friend hadn’t heard the news yet and she started freaking out telling me she had an appointment there scheduled for a month from now and asked if that would still happen. I told them I don’t know. But we’re here today demanding that it will.”

So what can we do? Well, we can continue to email and call Robert I. Grossman’s office [email: [email protected]; phone: (212) 263-3269.] We can send a message via NYC-DSA’s action portal. And we can continue to protest.

Actor and activist Cynthia Nixon spoke as a lifelong New Yorker and the mother of a trans man who had his top surgery at NYU Langone. “This is where I’m planting my flag,” she said. “I want to tell the people of NYU as I told you I just live a few blocks away. You’re going to be seeing a lot of me. And you’re going to be seeing a lot of this amazing crowd of people and there are a lot of people here today and we are mad as hell.”

Grossman and anyone else involved in this decision have underestimated how eager people are to fight back against the Trump administration and this slew of bigoted executive orders. It can feel like there’s little to do to stop Trump and Elon Musk and everyone else in Washington, but with their early compliance NYU Langone has become a practical action item for many angry people. To quote queer council member Tiffany Cabán, “The first rule against tyranny is you do not obey in advance.”

But this is just the beginning. Even if NYU Langone reverses their decision, even if these executive orders are ruled unconstitutional, the federal government and the Republican Party have chosen trans people as one of their scapegoats, and most of the Democratic Party has no interest in fighting back.

Young trans people shouldn’t have to be the ones fighting on their own behalf, but they’re doing it anyway. Mina, another young trans person who is part of NYC Youth 4 Trans Rights, announced a trans visibility day march on March 31. If he has to be out there fighting, the least we can do is be out there alongside him.

The rally ended with impassioned words from Freya, another young trans person. “I have been on estrogen since I was 14,” she said. “And I know that I’m very privileged to be able to say that. But in the same breath, I can say that I’m scared for myself, for my own healthcare, and for all the other people like me… don’t let them win.”

NYU Langone must reverse this decision immediately. They must stand with their patients and doctors instead of politicians and donors. Don’t let them win. Don’t let them win.


Read more of Autostraddle’s recent political coverage:

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Drew Burnett Gregory

Drew is a Brooklyn-based writer, filmmaker, and theatremaker. She is a Senior Editor at Autostraddle with a focus in film and television, sex and dating, and politics. Her writing can also be found at Bright Wall/Dark Room, Cosmopolitan UK, Refinery29, Into, them, and Knock LA. She was a 2022 Outfest Screenwriting Lab Notable Writer and a 2023 Lambda Literary Screenwriting Fellow. She is currently working on a million film and TV projects mostly about queer trans women. Find her on Twitter and Instagram.

Drew Burnett has written 662 articles for us.

5 Comments

  1. Alternate number I recieved to reach Robert Grossman when calling tonight is 212-263-6906. Worth a shot if you don’t get through!

    • Thank you for this!! Very helpful. I got the “patient relations department” voicemail at this number.

  2. Lessons of Clause 28 in the UK, please be prepared:
    – People immediately follow to the new laws, even of they have not passed yet.
    – They go a lot further than the actual rule, on their own accord. They follow what they think is “the spirit” of the new rules, not the letter.
    – They turn their coat within a matter of ca. two week, everything is happening extremely fast.
    – It is not just the right wingers coming out of the woodwork, but the so called liberals behaving in the exact same way.
    – Its a mass phenomenon.
    – It was the same way in Nazi Germany where on the local level it all happened a lot earlier and faster, so that Hitler was often following with the legislation, not leading. A very specific loop.

  3. Absolutely cowardly and devastating. Was able to get through to Dr Grossman’s office and the person politely took a message. Thanks for this small actionable step.

  4. thanks for this beautifully written article, drew! i was there that night & you described it really well

Comments are closed.

‘How Can I Be a Good Girlfriend When My Partner Is Extremely Anxious About Sex’

Q:

I have a boyfriend that recently moved in with me. We’ve been dating awhile now but he has been too far to visit very often until he eventually moved in. We have always been very loving and supportive emotionally and felt close with him in ways I haven’t with past partners. I feel like we intuitively understand each other and our needs in a lot of matters and are willing to figure it out when intuition isn’t enough. One area that we have not been able to find understanding around is physical intimacy.

My boyfriend is not very experienced with romantic physical contact. He gets nervous talking about sex or participating in it to the point where he says the anxiety causes him physical discomfort. He doesn’t seem to enjoy things like kissing beyond an affectionate smooch and looks at me like a deer in the headlights any time we discuss physical intimacy. He also says that he is considering whether or not he could be asexual. When we do anything more than cuddling I ask if he is enjoying himself and wants to continue and he usually responds he is “okay” but does not really have anything he wants to do. I would be okay with no sexual contact if that is what he wanted but he still seems unsure and I don’t want to take away that chance from him just because he’s nervous. He also specifically asked for me to take the lead sexually because he is inexperienced and trying to figure out what to do makes him uncomfortable.

I especially feel confused because I live with another partner that is part of the triad and we can be extremely sexually engaged throughout the day. Like, BDSM with established rules and titles type of engaged throughout the day. We don’t engage in anything that makes him uncomfortable (he has talked to us about what parts of our play are a bit much so we have opened a dialogue about it), but he can be really hard on himself about comparing himself to other people in the relationship. He has already shared that how sweet and close our dynamic is has made him feel a little left out in the past, we offered to include him in our play if he wanted but with sex in general being a sensitive topic he was unsurprisingly not interested. I am fine with how things are in general and he got over those feelings of being left out to where our dynamic can coexist with him being in the relationship. We are at a point where things are fine as is, but I am still a bit lost on how to proceed.

Part of me feels like it’s a thorny topic and the best move would be to wait to engage with him sexually at all, like if he is still nervous then it would be better to not engage at all until he feels comfortable enough to start slow and attempt stuff like make outs. But then another part of me doesn’t want him to feel like I’m not sexually attracted to him. The fact he is sexually inexperienced is something that has made him feel ashamed when he looks at my other partner’s confidence. If I settle on waiting for him to get comfortable and stop trying to initiate then will he start to feel I’m less attracted to him then my other partner? Not to mention that if he is nervous about sexual contact but still wants it then getting some experience so it doesn’t seem like this scary and intimidating thing to him would be helpful.

I also know the first and most obvious solution is to talk to my boyfriend, but he only ever says that sexual stuff is okay and freezes up when we start touching. I have even talked to him about worrying whether or not he enjoys what we are doing and he say he’ll make sure to let me know if he needs to stop. So if I take him at his word, then to listen to him would mean continuing to initiate while I feel like he’s uncomfortable, which makes me feel like I am being a bad partner for not helping him feel more at ease or pumping the brakes. On the other hand, if I stop initiating with him sexually when he says he wants me to take the lead then I am kind of saying I don’t trust him and I risk him feeling unattractive or like I am not interested in figuring out our chemistry and sex might remain this scary unknown instead of becoming more familiar and comfortable (as long as he wants to continue engaging so it can get there, of course). I know I also need to feel comfortable proceeding regardless of if he’s okay with continuing, which is part of why I wanted to double check if these sorts of nerves are normal or if that should be an immediate red light. Really the main reason I’m iffy is that he has hidden how uncomfortable things make him in the past. It was not during intimate contact with me specifically, but if you are willing to force yourself to go out when you are miserable and having a terrible time because you don’t want to be a party pooper and you are self conscious about your level of sexual experience then it kind of follows that I should make extra sure they aren’t pressing themselves in this arena either. It is further complicated by the fact that he just moved across state lines with several in between and he has never lived outside his home state away from his family so there are a lot of other nerves and changes happening besides our sex life. On top of that, I have repeatedly heard things like, “Much of the time, being asexual in a relationship with an allosexual partner can feel like the allosexual’s needs are… insisting upon themselves,” and I think that is my other biggest concern now that everything is laid out.

How can I make sure my needs are not insisting upon themselves and that my boyfriend is not pushing himself too much while he figures out if he’s asexual while also making sure he feels seen and desired? How do I be a good girlfriend to him and make sure he knows he will be loved and respected no matter what happens while still respecting that he told me doesn’t want to stop trying to have sex and wants me to take the lead? Besides talking it out, as we have done that plenty on this specific part of the question and he is honestly at a loss although we will continue talking, how do I experiment and find what makes my partner feel good if even a light make out session makes him overwhelmed with anxiety about his inexperience? Should I tell him he is welcome to initiate and make my attraction clear but let him come to me when he’s ready so he doesn’t feel the pressure or would that lead to him feeling unwanted? Should I try a bunch of different things to see if he likes them or would that create more unnecessary pressure? Should I mostly make sure to keep a sharp eye out for how he is feeling while continuing conversations about safety and comfort so I can let my intuition guide me on the specifics of what to try when?

Thanks for hearing me out, I am familiar with how to handle several parts of the situation in isolation but when added together it is a bit overwhelming to navigate how they interact and if I am doing the most I can to respect my partner and make them feel valued.

Sincerely,
Polyam Sex Maze

A:

Hi there, Polyam Sex Maze.

It’s good to see someone else who elaborates in such detail. This reads like my internal monologue when I’m feeling unsure about something complex. That’s my approach to writing these columns, too. When I read the submission, I let the voice in my head click onto key points. If those points repeat, I’ll elaborate on them in writing.

The two things I kept hearing in my head during this piece are, “some forms of anxiety are out of your paygrade and realm of responsibility,” and “there comes a point where you’ve taken reasonable steps but others should meet you.

At some point, sexual anxiety catches everyone who has sex and even most people who don’t have sex. It’s a perfect storm of vulnerabilities for those of us who have gaps in our confidence. Social interaction. Physical performance. Societal expectations. Taboo topics. Anxiety magnifies our fears but we can often cope with that on a daily basis. But when several of those fears gather under one roof, even a resilient person falls back to default behaviors.

I suspect that’s part of what’s happening to your boyfriend.

From what I can tell, he’s got some interest in sex, but it’s paired with a lot of uncertainty. This includes uncertainty about his sexuality. He’s got an interest in your BDSM dynamic but isn’t ready to participate. You’ve given him an open door policy on sexual contact, but he feels unsure about taking part. This leads to uncertainty on your part because you’re getting very mixed communications about his interests versus his actions — plus all the secondary uncertainty this can stir in your mind about whether he feels included in the relationship.

You have a complex person set before you, and I have to applaud the patience in handling his complexity. Yet the more I read into your story, the more I think there’s stuff happening underneath that is beyond us. Both beyond our paygrade and beyond what we can reasonably take on as partners while looking out for ourselves. I saw shades of this when you mentioned that he’s known to conceal discomfort and press himself in situations he doesn’t always enjoy. That could be applied to sex (and also lend credence to his asexual hypothesis). This happens to a lot of people who aren’t fully confident in recognizing or advocating for their care needs (guilty!).

Everything you wrote emphasizes sexual anxiety, but that left me wondering if your boyfriend is particularly anxious in other parts of life? If he is, it could be a sign of a more generalized problem that also affects his sex life. If he’s not a generally anxious person, that’s really notable because that could speak to experiences or events that keep him from taking part in sex despite wanting to. Either way, his anxiety sounds significant enough that it keeps him from trying things he wants, and it also affects his relationships. That’s almost textbook anxiety. Which takes it into a therapist’s purview. If you’re in the position to consider some kind of relationship counselling or a solo therapy process for him, I think it’s well-worth considering. But should you approach the topic, it’s critical to approach it with your usual compassion and gentleness so that it doesn’t trip a major fear of failure or inadequacy. This is only a path you should take if you feel it’s feasible and safe to approach, but I just wanted to highlight the fact that we don’t have to bear every one of our partners’ anxieties and difficulties on our own. Sometimes, things do get further than what we can provide.

And you’ve provided a lot already. You give me the impression of someone who listens with a compassionate ear and offers fair guidance to someone in a difficult spot. A lot of the time, that is the best we can do as partners for a loved one in need. It’s utterly normal to want to resolve the situation (or less palatably: ‘fix’ a person). The frustration that accompanies being unable to resolve things is likewise normal. I nonetheless believe that you’ve given your boyfriend exactly what he needs: a comforting ear, a road forward, and openness to his needs.

Of course, you came here seeking answers and “chill, you’ve done enough!” won’t feel adequate. So I do intend to give some practical pointers too. Strap in.

How can you try to have your sexuality ‘insist upon itself’ even less? You could turn the needle further away from sex and just focus on being his girlfriend and friend. He clearly benefits from the friendship and company of your relationship. Lean on that. The dates, the little smooches, and the good time you spend together. Give him the non-sexual side that he does enjoy while he figures out the rest.

How do you balance out his interest in continued sexual experimentation despite being at a loss for where to start? See above. Just keep being the good partner to him you already are and play it by ear. You’ll have learned much about his needs and responses during those conversations with him. That’s the groundwork for the day he does turn out to be ready and aroused.

How can you ensure his comfort and assuage his fears while also not imposing the topic of sex onto him? Take space when it’s offered, but let it lie otherwise. By that, I mean reassure him of his full validity and goodness as a person when he expresses uncertainty. But otherwise let the topic hibernate. You’re still ensuring that every discussion he has with you about his fears is met with compassion, but not adding anything that might frighten him.

Given his noted pattern for anxiety and uncertainty, I don’t think the answer is to try lots of sexual things with him or to keep telling him that he’s welcome to initiate. I know the latter from personal experience: there’s a point where welcoming someone to sex can turn into pressure if they don’t otherwise feel ready. Rather, it sounds like he’s in an introspective space where he needs to work through anxieties and identity. This is a good time to give him a safe base for that exploration, rather than putting more stuff on his plate.

I can see exactly why you sometimes feel overwhelmed. Your situation is full of uncertainty and contradictions. This is the time to explore outside support, like therapy, or take a step back and be a good friend to your partner. Trying new things with your boyfriend is well-intentioned, but I don’t think either of you would benefit from the strain that could bring. Let’s focus on the good you’ve already cultivated and take new steps when everyone feels ready.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Summer Tao

Summer Tao is a South Africa based writer. She has a fondness for queer relationships, sexuality and news. Her love for plush cats, and video games is only exceeded by the joy of being her bright, transgender self

Summer has written 63 articles for us.

9 Comments

  1. I’ve really come forward to reading your responses, Summer 😊 my initial thoughts were so different — watch porn together! Try making out blind folded! Start a sexy list so you can communicate in a different way!! — but after reading your very thoughtful response I have more thoughts on what being a good partner could look like in this moment. I love how these classic advice columns can offer such good wisdom!

    • Thanks Kam! We all have different approaches to relationship problems. I tend to pick ‘safe’, low-risk advice because most people writing in have already exhausted other their ideas and are still nervous. Advice columns are an art that I’m still learning :)

    • …just because someone is in a heterosexual relationship does not mean they’re heterosexual.

      • It’s sad Autostraddle still gets small-minded comments like this. The bf could be trans for all we know! While I’m here, I also really enjoy your advice Summer, it’s logical, helpfully directive and caring.

  2. I always love these! You have so much good food for thought and unlike some other columns I have read I always walk away with new angles!

  3. I don’t know, to me it kind of sounds like the boyfriend is asexual but afraid to lose LW, and jealous of the attention between LW and other partner but not necessarily the BDSM. Is the boyfriend actually polyamorous? That’s something I’m wondering too. I wonder if he’s entirely comfortable with that dynamic.
    This line really got me: ‘ I have repeatedly heard things like, “Much of the time, being asexual in a relationship with an allosexual partner can feel like the allosexual’s needs are… insisting upon themselves” ‘
    It seems like he is telling the LW he is not interested in the same things physically/when it comes to relationships, and is feeling too much pressure for sexual activity he doesn’t want. Perhaps the LW is not hearing that. That was the overwhelming impression I got. It does seem like at least as things are this relationship is not meant to last, if not for lack of sexual compatibility that leaves both partners feeling frustrated, then for the inability to communicate (or perhaps to listen).

    • I think

      “I have repeatedly heard things like, “Much of the time, being asexual in a relationship with an allosexual partner can feel like the allosexual’s needs are… insisting upon themselves”

      was referring to a previous article in this column that used that line regarding allosexual people and asexual people, not saying LW has heard that from their boyfriend over and over, though LW didn’t make that very clear.

Comments are closed.

Emilia Pérez Star Karla Sofía Gascón’s Unhinged Racist Tweets Have Killed Her Oscar Campaign

Emilia Pérez star Karla Sofía Gascón’s Oscars Controversy, Explained

Emilia Pérez trans review: a close up of Karla Sofia Gascón

Emilia Pérez‘s monumental 13 Oscar nominations were remarkable for a lot of reasons, including Karla Sofía Gascón’s Best Actress nod, which made her the first out trans performer nominated for an Oscar. (Elliot Page was nominated in 2007, but was not yet out.) It was a major milestone in Oscars history, even as the film itself has divided critics and offended the communities it aims to represent. When asked about the backlash from queer and trans critics, including our own, Gascón didn’t mince words: “You must be super well-adjusted to criticize the work of 700 people from your couch, sitting there next to your PlayStation. Second, they claim to speak for everyone. Let me tell you: Being LGBT doesn’t make you less of an idiot.”

Still, there was plenty of excitement around her nomination.

But now, Emilia Pérez star Karla Sofía Gascón is on an apology tour for recently uncovered racist and otherwise offensive tweets. According to these apologies, she feels she’s being unfairly attacked, which is a common response from people facing the consequences of their own actions. I’m often wary of “cancel culture” because people can grow and change and often their more recent actions don’t align with long-forgotten posts from many years ago, but Karla Sofía Gascón was saying these really disturbing things again and again, as recently as 2022, when she was in her 50s.

“When someone in a historic position representing a film built on so-called progressive values has a history of racist and bigoted tweets, it exposes the hypocrisy of it all,” Journalist Sarah Hagi told Variety. This isn’t about meaningful representation — it’s just marketing. And that marketing falls apart when the person at the center of it is a racist bigot.”

And we’re not talking about one small misstep, or some implied or thinly veiled racism, or one moment where she accidentally misspoke. Hagi uncovered a LOT of posts from the actress that are just blatant Islamophobia, targeting Muslim people on multiple occasions, plus more racism including anti-Black racism in the wake of George Floyd’s murder, and an anti-vaccine tirade that was full of harmful Chinese stereotypes. Posts that were not deleted until after Hagi posted a thread of screenshots that started to get traction.

A few days prior to the resurfacing of the tweet, Gascón upset fans of I’m Still Here, after complaining in an interview that “people working with” fellow Best Actress nominee Fernanda Torres, the star of I’m Still Here, were “tearing me and Emilia Pérez down,” which, she said, “speaks more about their movie than mine.” She later apologized and praised Torres and her performance, emphasizing that she wasn’t taking aim at her specifically, but people supporting her. Some argued that this rhetoric was at odds with the Academy’s social media regulations surrounding making disparaging remarks about other nominees, but it was not.

Gascón says she is not backing out of the Oscars though, despite one of the uncovered tweets from 2021 being a complaint about the increasing diversity of the awards show, saying watching the awards take place was like “watching an Afro-Korean festival” or “a Black Lives Matter demonstration.”  She has issued multiple statements, including a tearful video interview with CNN.

She said in one statement that she “used social media as a diary, reflections or notes, to later create stories or characters,” adding, “I have defended each and every one of the minorities in this world and supported freedom of religion and any action against racism and homophobia in the same way that I have criticized the hypocrisy that underlies them, because the first thing I am critical of is myself.”

In another written interview, she said she wouldn’t step down from her Oscar nomination, because she “has not committed any crime” and furthermore, “nor have I harmed anyone.” (Which I would argue is not true.) She said in a response that people have set out “to stain my existence with lies or things taken out of context,” but this isn’t hearsay; we can see the tweets. And there is no context that would make them any less offensive. (She also did the classic “I can’t be racist, I have a Muslim friend” bit in one of her so-called apologies…) 

She shut down her X account on Friday morning. At a Q&A that same day, which she was scheduled to attend but did not, Zoe Saldaña said she was still processing, but felt “really sad because I don’t support it, and I don’t have any tolerance for negative rhetoric towards people of any group.” She reiterated having had a positive experience making the film.

“Based on my conversations in recent days with Academy members, many are going to have a hard time voting for Emilia Pérez in any category, given that Emilia Pérez herself has become toxic,” wrote Scott Feinberg in The Hollywood Reporter, lamenting also the dim prospects “of her colleagues who were also nominated for the film, including Saldaña, who has been the best supporting actress frontrunner for months.”

Netflix has allegedly released a new FYC poster for Emilia Pérez, not just de-emphasizing Karla Sofía Gascón, but erasing her completely. It’s also been reported that Gascón will not be coming to the U.S. for any of this week’s awards activities including the AFI Awards luncheon, the Critics Choice Awards, the Producers Guild Awards, and the Santa Barbara Film Festival.


More Queer Pop Culture Stories For You:

+ We might be getting a good and proper Joss-free official BUFFY REBOOT??? From the director of Eternals and the writers of Poker Face and starring THE titular vampire slayer Buffy Anne Summers, Sarah Michelle Gellar!! I’m kind of freaking out.

+ The Grammys were gay and we are going to tell you all about it

+ The M3GAN 2 trailer featured the titular AI doll dancing to Chappell Roan’s Feminominon because she IS that bitch

+ Queer Spice Girl Mel B will return as a judge on the new season of America’s Got Talent

+ Unsurprisingly after all that has been unveiled about the author of its source material, The Sandman’s upcoming second season will definitively be its last

+ The Duffer Brothers, creators of Stranger Things, will be making a show called The Boroughs, which will feature pansexual actress Jena Malone

+ On the theme of LGBTQ+ celebrities who let us down, Ellen might have fled to the UK but she’s still ruffling feathers

+ Christopher Nolan is adapting Homer’s The Odyssey and Elliot Page has been tapped for a role, adding him to the long list of legends already attached to the project

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Valerie Anne

Valerie Anne (she/they) a TV-loving, video-game-playing nerd who loves reading, watching, and writing about stories in all forms. While having a penchant for sci-fi, Valerie will watch anything that promises a good story, and especially if that good story is queer.

Valerie has written 620 articles for us.

1 Comment

  1. This movie is “remarkable” in the lack of sensibility towards Mexican culture and the subject of missing people in our country. And the fact that Karla, who not only lived, but worked in mexican tv and film industry prior to this movie, didn’t raise her hand to acknowledge how problematic this might be to mexican audience, kind of confirms how deaf tone everyone was on the subject.

Comments are closed.

Very Special Gay Episode: 15 Years Ago ‘Drop Dead Diva’ Cast Candis Cayne as a Trans Lesbian

Welcome to Very Special Gay Episode, a series where we recap standalone lesbian episodes from classic TV shows that are not otherwise gay. In this installment, we discuss Drop Dead Gorgeous season two, episode eight: “Queen of Mean.”


“A model who dies in a car accident and comes back to life as a fat lawyer” sounds like a deeply offensive 30 Rock sketch, but it’s not. It’s the premise of Drop Dead Diva, a heartwarming girly legal procedural that ran from 2009 to 2014.

Growing up in more of a Lost/Prison Break/24 family, I didn’t watch Drop Dead Diva when it was on air, but my partner did! And recently, fueled by a burst of nostalgia, we started rewatching it together for the low, low price of $11.99 a season. The first thing that struck me was how quickly the main character Jane stopped trying to lose the weight. This wasn’t your typical “woe is me for being fat and therefore unlovable” early 2000’s drivel. It was deeper. Jane was hot, desirable, and desired. Men wanted her, she had canonically good sex, was a great friend, and one hell of a lawyer.

The cast was populated with its fair share of queer icons: Margaret Cho plays Jane’s trusty, sassy assistant Teri, and Rosie O’Donnell is featured as the recurring character Judge Madeline Summers. Unfortunately both of those characters were straight. Rosie O’Donnell’s character even had a whole episode dedicated to suing a dating service for not finding her a suitable man. But then we arrived at season two episode eight, and I got more than I had ever dared to imagine from a pre-Obergefell comedy… not only were there dykes, one of them was trans.

Despite Time boldly announcing 2014 as “The Transgender Tipping Point,” it took several more years for trans actors playing trans roles to become industry standard. (Even last year’s Squid Game season two cast a cis man as a trans woman.) And yet 15 years ago, Drop Dead Diva got it right. Trans actress Candis Cayne plays Allison Webb, a trans woman in a legal battle with her in-laws over her wife’s possessions after her wife dies suddenly in a car accident. Her in-laws who, by the way, couldn’t even be bothered to attend their own daughter’s funeral.

This plotline rings true to the countless stories of queer people who lost their loved ones to AIDS, only to have their absent in-laws take away all of their late partner’s possessions and even their homes. Ultimately, that was the main goal of gay marriage. Yes, having the government recognize your love is great, but it’s more important to have a legal right to your partners’ possessions, to visit them in the hospital, and to make decisions about their care over an absent, homophobic biological family. This narrative is complicated in Drop Dead Diva by the fact that Allison had been legally married to her wife even though gay marriage was not yet legal in California. Allison and her wife had gotten married pretransition, so technically their marriage was straight, and therefore legally binding… maybe.

Here’s where I was expecting the episode to get problematic. The narrative in my head played out like this: Allison’s lawyers Greyson and Kim argue that because Allison is biologically male (whatever that means) their marriage is still a law-abiding straight marriage, plain and simple, transphobia saves the day! And initially, that is what Greyson and Kim suggest. But Allison immediately shoots it down, “When I transitioned, Melanie stood by me every step of the way. By saying I’m a man denies everything that we went through. Please, find another way.” And find another way they do!

After a suggestion from Jane, Greyson uses the logic of Littleton v Prange, a real case that invalidated marriages between men and transgender women in the state of Texas based on the fact that same sex marriage was illegal in the state and Christine Littleton, a transgender woman, was assigned male at birth. He argues that according to this logic, Allison’s marriage was still legal, as she was also assigned male at birth, a distinct difference from being male. Shockingly enough, this TV argument has a real legal basis: After Littleton v Prange, lesbian couples were legally allowed to marry in Texas if one of them was a trans woman.

The episode ends with Allison winning her case; she is named as her wife’s next of kin and retains legal ownership of their possessions. Not only that, Greyson, who had originally been uncomfortable with the case, even misgendering Allison once (but only once! And not to her face! Shockingly sensitive for the time!), gives an impassioned speech about how Allison’s case was arguing for the existence of true love. “What these two went through… and they stayed together. It makes you believe that love can conquer all, and nobody should be able to take that away from them.” Even the transphobic father-in-law comes around, telling Allison, “I can never forgive myself for turning my back on my daughter. Now I’ll never see her again. Thank you for making her happy,” before giving her his mother’s necklace. It’s a heartwarming tale of trans acceptance and queer love conquering all, and something I was not at all expecting from an episode of a sitcom that came out in 2010.

My partner and I cried as we watched holding each other in our bed. As a trans lesbian couple, I don’t think either of us expects to see our relationship used as an example of true love in current media, let alone in a show from before gay marriage was legal. So often trans characters are relegated to corpses, punchlines, boogeymen, and cautionary tales. I can name so many examples in media of The Trans Struggle™, and yet so few of trans people falling in love, and even less so about that love being legitimate in the eyes of your average cis lawyer.

It’s no secret: Things are scary for trans people right now. The Democrats are shying away from defending us, Joe Biden signed a transphobic bill into law, Kamala Harris tried to use Trump’s record of providing gender affirming care to prisoners as a gotcha, and Trump has used his first few days in office to aggressively attack trans rights. This is reflected in our media. One of the most beloved children’s book series was written by a virulent transphobe who continues to benefit off the IP as it’s spun off into prequels, theme parks, musicals, and TV adaptations. Matt Walsh and The Daily Wire produced What is a Woman? and Ladyballers, and even the Olympics is full of transmisogynistic vitriol directed at cis women of color.

Our enemies are doing everything they can to delegitimize our existence. But maybe if we can continue to showcase our beautiful love stories, the kind I see at every bar and house party and friends wedding, the kind I see in my own home, there’s hope. Because, to paraphrase Drop Dead Diva, queer love makes you believe that love can conquer all, and nobody can take that away from us.


Drop Dead Diva is available to buy.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Sunny Laprade

Based in NYC, Sunny Laprade is a standup comedian, storyteller, writer, and producer. Sunny performed her first hour of comedy at Alfred University in 2017 at just 17 years old. She is the current host and producer of T4T Comedy, a monthly all-transgender comedy show. Her first 75 minute comedy special, Queer Enough, which she filmed, wrote, and produced, ran for two nights to sold out audiences and was released to the public on YouTube in 2022. She is a staff writer for Late Stage Live, and her variety hour Dolls on Tour is currently touring the country!

Sunny has written 1 article for us.

1 Comment

Comments are closed.