So grateful to our exes for opening our eyes to these tips and tricks and vital life skills. No really, we’re actually grateful. Sarcasm-free.

“After explaining who Shannon was in relation to me, we were let in to go through airport-like security around 7:40, I was handed a laminated piece of paper with ‘Applicant 1’ on it and an accompanying feeling of having won at waiting in line, and we were let up to the floor for the interview at 8.”