Results for: book
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Needle Play Brings Me Back into My Body Over and Over Again
Editor’s Note: This essay includes descriptions of piercings with hypodermic needles and blood in a BDSM context and brief references to self-harm. Needles are an edge. They encompass many spheres and much stigma, reminding us that we’re flesh sacks filled with fluid a mere pinprick can pierce. IV drug users and those who are tattooed […]
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Sadomasochism & Mental Health: Self-Expression
“When I was diagnosed, and realizing how it affected me outside of the way that I eat, it’s these processes throughout my day or the way that my personality functions. It isn’t that disruptive, but having the framework helped. Finding kink, having the words for it, helped contextualize the sex that I like to have, the friendships that I like to have, the dynamics that I like to have and the relationships in general.”
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Sadomasochism & Mental Health: Boundaries
Kink is something that I can contextualize my life around, around eroticism generally, and that felt so at home in my brain. That I can have a container for a thing, that it is healthy to have a container for things.
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Sadomasochism & Mental Health: Fetish
I don’t really have a lot left from childhood, and after a while, I became very into certain tangible objects. The idea that you could fetishize a material object instantly made sense to me.
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The Unique Grief of Ending a BDSM Relationship
Breaking up is hard to do, but what do we know about breakups between Dominant and submissive? This is a personal exploration of how grief settles when the collar comes off.
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Shibari 101: Hogtie
Here’s how to put a few basic shibari ties together so you can hogtie your rope bottom!
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Queer Women and Leather: A Culture Clash That Has Nothing to Do With Veganism
An understanding of the leather community can help us co-exist, share spaces and celebrate all of the different ways to live queer lives.
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Bottoms Up: Earn It
It’s not that I don’t want to submit, it’s that submitting is so different from how I have to conduct my life that it takes effort to turn off that HBIC part of me so that I can relish letting go.
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View From The Top: A Short History of What I Learned From Dating
I wish someone had told me sooner that I had been seeking mastery all this time, but I wouldn’t have been ready to hear it. Until r came along.
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View From The Top: Where I’ve Been
Before any of my other sexuality identities, I was kinky.
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View From The Top: Topping While Butch
It took me years to settle into the idea that masculinity and topping were actually, authentically my identities.
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View From The Top: It’s Protocol
We thrive on these everyday tiny moments where we both get to be reminded of our agreed-upon power differential.
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View From The Top: Playing Through Depression
It’s almost impossible to master while grieving. When that grief turns into a depression, is it even M/s anymore?
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View From The Top: Giving Orders
Giving orders is more than the words coming out of my mouth. It’s the tone of voice I use, the eye contact, the confidence, the ease with which I speak.
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View From The Top: Desire That Looks Like Mine
The possibility of finding our kink community gave me the courage to take another deep breath and open the door.
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Bottoms Up: Did My Feminist Ancestors Burn Their Bras For This?
I’ve worked hard to hold onto my independence, and here I was giving it up — to someone more dominant and more masculine. My feminist ancestors didn’t burn their bras for this. Except what if they did?
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Bottoms Up: Little Boi
Being in little space doesn’t feel like being a child again. It feels more freeing than my childhood ever was, and like something completely different.
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View From The Top: Coming and Crying; Master and Slave
“Master and slave — in consensual, intentional contexts — are the precise words for the cravings I have in my heart and gut to own, control, protect and nurture my partner.”
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View From The Top: Canes Are Sticks!
I had always put boundaries on my sadism — until I started seeing impact toys everywhere.