“This is what the show is about. The show is about dating your exes, your friend’s exes, and your exes’ exes. That’s the topic of the program.”

“I just want to say, I know that this woman is supposed to be from Kansas City — and that’s actually a personal attack on me.”

“Imagine if all of our days were as productive as the people in The L Word. We would be cruising through life.”

John: Could you imagine you and Dylan just got done cunnaling-ing together, you’re in bed, the California sun is basking on you. And then you turn to Dylan and you’re like, “We have to get up so we can go to Max’s Willy Wonka baby shower.” That’s the thing you interrupt with.

That’s right, we’ve got a BONUS EPISODE for you today and are gonna be doing a LIVE episode tomorrow! We are soothing the pain of departure, like how Jenny fell into a pool.

“I just want you to know that I don’t even want to go to Ilene Chaiken’s pool, but I want that for you so badly. I would die for your right to go to Ilene Chaiken’s pool.”

“I think everyone should make love to a plastic spoon at least once in their lifetime.”

We’re back NOW WITH TRANSCRIPTS for Episode 501, in which Jenny refuses a croissant and Tasha calls to say she can’t talk right now and Jodi hates table cloths.

“My one note is, “God, I wish Tasha was a firefighter, so I didn’t have to feel conflicted about her.”

The lights are out and everybody’s making out and we are having a live episode that you can watch (or read the transcript of!) right now, and also a podcast episode! WOW!

“I had a moment where I was watching this again, and I remembered watching this scene 12 years ago, and I was like, wow, I’m gay. You know?”

Riese: One boob out. I love the one boob out.
Carly: One boob out is incredible.

Thomas: I remember hearing that there was a trans character named Max, and that he gave birth and that possibly he was inspired by my actions.
Riese: A hundred percent, he was inspired by you.
Carly: A thousand percent.

Oh my God, you’ve never been on OurChart?

It’s Shane’s fortieth birthday and Generation Q’s gift to you is a few pictures of Dana, a really REALLY hot sex scene and a cameo by Robin Roemer!

Get your ass into The Ask and Tell Helicopter, it’s time to get schooled about lezzing out!

“I feel like I’m very much a stickler for how Black church is shown on TV, and I think a lot of people get it wrong in movies and TV a lot, like it just never is quite right. And I feel like Hollywood is that way too. And I felt like this [portrayal of Hollywood] was very accurate, and I was shocked!”

Welcome! to the First L Word Recap Foreplay Session. Remember also when you’re at the edges of your seat that there’s gonna be like an even more exciting Autostraddle experience coming to you starting next week for reals. So you might just want to sit on the floor. I like sitting on the floor, personally.

I AM THE ONLY trans guy ON CABLE! But instead of integrating me into your show, you’ve progressively emphasized how my differences make me at odds with the lesbian community and the only personality trait you’ve given me is “self-loathing.”

We had a special visitor from Australia (Oz, co-leader of The L Word Online ) and creator, head writer, director and executive producer of AfterEllen’s hit series Alexi’s Closet, Alexi Melvin. Because the “Fly Riese to LA and/or Haviland to NYC so they can vlog and watch The L Word together” fund is very empty (TIP JAR PEOPLE!), she obvs won’t be watching, but I did get everyone else to come, and this little post will end with all of Team Autostraddle telling YOU what they’ve liked best, and loathed, about The L Word thus far.