Results for: dead to me
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Uncertainty and Disquiet: My Non-Consensual Childhood Circumcision as a Trans Woman
At the time, I didn’t know that I was experiencing a contentious procedure that would leave me physically scarred and emotionally wounded. I did it because I was told I should. Decades later, I learned about assent in a postgraduate research course.
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Untethered: In Defense of a Messy Bed
There’s a certain kind of comfort to me in dishevelment.
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Untethered: I Can Still Hear My Ex Mother-in-Law’s Voice
Last night, while out with a date, my voice pitched too high. I winced internally. There are a lot of complications around this for me.
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Untethered: The Designated Girl-Son
I came across the concept of the “designated son” on TikTok.
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They Should Have Sent A Poet
“I was around the same age as young Ellie when ‘Contact’ came out. The way she so clearly carries her childhood self with her made adulthood legible; it made time seem like less of an unknowable straight line and something more like a circle. Watching it as an adult I have that same feeling.”
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My Jiddo Fled Palestinian Genocide so I Could Be Free
A free Palestine means a freer world.
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An Exorcism of Sorts
The haunted house persists in horror media for a reason.
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Untethered: On Miss Havisham-Style Decision-Making
My ex and I worked out a separation agreement over the course of those months and signed it in August.
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Et Tu, Laura Ingalls Wilder?
I, too, can only be what I am. And I am a hick, and a hillbilly, and a half-breed. I’m just telling you a story. It’s all I know how to do.
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Thank You, Ex: For (1) Set of Ghost Hands
I don’t like to think about the endings, which is probably why I’m always haunted, always clinging to things that return even when I should pretend I do not see them.
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Untethered: How Do You Know You’re Living Where You Want To Be?
This dissolution of home presents a lot of choices — how I’ll spend my time — who I’ll visit, when, for what holidays if any.
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Building An Altar to Honor Pulse on Its Fifth Anniversary
“Building ofrendas unite the living and the dead; they give space for our stories to be held. I light candles and kneel before them to say prayers because doing so reminds me, even when I’m my most lost – I’m never alone in this world.”
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Slow Takes: A Tribute to Zoom Theatre
The story of how I joined theatre is like if the Disney Channel was dark and gay.
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Seltzer Tastes Like Punishment
There are so many good songs about drinking but none about seltzer, have you noticed that?
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Every Life on This Page All at Once
I’m burdened by unlived lives, hovering within my dreams, just behind my pupils.
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Give It Time, Delphine
To really love anything, I think, is to run the risk of it not loving you back.
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Black Girls Are Always at the Center of Horror
There is a haunting that black girls know.
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In Queer Horror Anthology “It Came From the Closet,” Carmen Maria Machado Considers Jennifer’s Body
On queerbaiting, bisexuality, and Jennifer’s Body. This essay is an exclusive excerpt from the queer horror anthology It Came From the Closet, on sale next week.
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Working Out at a Strength Gym Has Been Great, but These Exercises Make Me Want To Scream
Even though I believe in complete body liberation and fat freedom, I don’t like to talk about my “I’ve been fat my whole life” baggage.
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I’m a Psychologist Who Didn’t See My Own Divorce Coming
Psychologists can see potential in every patient who is seeking therapy. I can’t look at my marriage without seeing all the ways we could still fix it.