This Holigay Flowchart Will Tell You Which Christmas Movie You Really Want to Watch


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Heather Hogan

Heather Hogan is an Autostraddle senior editor who lives in New York City with her wife, Stacy, and their cackle of rescued pets. She's a member of the Television Critics Association, the Gay and Lesbian Entertainment Critics Association, and a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer critic. You can also find her on Twitter, and Instagram.

Heather has written 1446 articles for us.

66 Comments

  1. ‘Twas a long time ago, longer now than it seems,
    In a place that perhaps you’ve seen in your dreams,
    For the story that you are about to be told,
    Took place in the holiday worlds of old,
    Now, you’ve probably wondered where holidays come from,
    If you haven’t, I’d say it’s time you begun

  2. This chart is everything I’ve ever needed.

    Also, thank you for understanding the difference between the REAL and GOOD Grinch and the upsetting, garbage one that somehow people are totally cool with. (I haven’t seen the newest, but I can say with certainty that it will land in the middle)

  3. Honestly, why am I even surprised that this chart led me to Home Alone? I already KNOW that Home Alone is the Christmas movie I want to watch because it (and the second one) are the only Christmas movies I’ll watch outside of the single showing of Frosty and Rudolph on TV.

  4. This is a very good and helpful chart, Heather.

    I feel that people should know that the best Thanksgiving movie is What’s Cooking. No one ever talks about it, but Mercedes Ruehl, Alfre Woodard, Joan Chen, and lesbian lovers Kyra Sedgwick and Julianna Margulies are in it.

  5. I am delighted to see my favorite Christmas Carol get high praise (Mickey’s)

    Scrooge (1970) is a delight and I got a lot of queer energy from it this year but being freshly out, I’m seeing BQE everywhere

  6. I’m shocked that the live action version of The Grinch is labelled the worst. It’s one of my favourites!

    And reading through the comments, it seems that everyone agrees. Can someone explain the hate?

    I may get a lot of hate for this next statement: I hate Carol. It’s more of the most boring movies I’ve ever seen.

  7. This is missing a vitally important Christmas movie (well two)

    Do you need a film which traverses language barriers/because you don’t wanna hear anyone talking? The film You’re looking for is The Snowman (and it’s spin off The Snow Dog)

    Maybe this is only a “thing” in the UK, but they are really beautiful music-only films

  8. Humbly submitting the obscure Muppet Family Christmas from 1987. It’s ridiculously expensive to buy now, but you can see a decent version online. You will not be sorry. Literally all the Muppets. The Swedish Chef tries to cook Big Bird. Animal sleeps on a clothes hanger in the closet. Fraggle Rock cameos. 100% the cure for holiday ickiness.

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