First Person

The Price I Pay For(ever) My Culture

Being a first-gen, Indigenous, queer, Samoan girl in diaspora almost cost me my Samoan culture. But one day, I’m going to be the queer Samoan elder who looks my grandchildren in their faces, and says: I was afraid the entire time that I was fighting for the world you deserve, but I did it anyway.

First Person

Lost and Found in the Fish Sauce: How I Cooked My Way Back Home

Through my mother’s recipes, I’m reminded of the resilience that flows in our blood. Instead of disconnecting from my body to survive, I nurtured it. Like me, cooking is hella queer and fluid. Every time I reimagine a dish, it can taste different depending on my mood.“How spicy do I want this dish to be today? “How sweet do I want this dessert?” It’s never fixed or prescribed. That’s what makes these evolving recipes — and the queer experience — so delicious.

First Person

The Illusion Of Safety

I don’t want to be caught parading around in last generation’s false sense of security. I’m kicking off Autostraddle’s first Asian Pacific Islander American (APIA) Heritage month by exploring the values my own South Asian and Japanese American parents and grandparents imparted to me, to learn to carry them forward.

First Person Sex + Relationships

14 Knuckles: The Bad Domme

The thing is: sometimes I like feeling disposable, like I’m just a bunch of holes that someone else is using for their pleasure. I know I’m fucking powerful, so sometimes I like to release control, let someone else do the work and have the power. That only works, though, when my boundaries are respected.

First Person

When the Emperor Becomes the Hanged One

While the Hanged One asks us to wait quietly instead of pushing hard, to surrender to the experience instead of fighting against what we cannot control, this is also a chance to understand what drives us, fulfills us, inspires us. What are you dreaming of? What has become more important to you, and what have you realized isn’t worth your energy?