Titles Prepared via Group G-Chat Between Rachel, Sarah, Laneia and Riese for Our Post on the Prop 8 Verdict, Which We Assumed We’d Lose
– August 4, 2010
1. Zen and the Art of Losing Your Marriage Rights
2. How to Lose Marriage Rights and Alienate Your Family
3. Problem Drinking, Therapy and Me: Living without Marriage Rights in 2010
4. A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Inequality
5. The Brief Wondrous Life of Prop 8
6. The Unbearable Inequity of California
7. If You Have to Cry About Losing Your Marriage Rights, Go Outside
8. Life of H8
9. And the Heart Says Whatever Inequality
10. Merriam Webster’s Dictionary of Rights You Don’t Have Cause You’re Gay
11. Are You There, Marriage? It’s Me, Disenfranchised Gay Person
12. The Art of Happiness, Sans Equality
13. Bastard Out of California
14. The Perks of Being a Homosexual
15. Oranges Pretty Much Are The Only Fruit, ‘Cause You’re Not Getting Wedding Cake
16. Twilight: Inequality
17. One Hundred Years of Inequality
18. Equality, Interrupted
19. How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Enjoy Being A Second-Class Citizen
Right after that one, we won.
[“listicle without commentary” title stolen from the awl]
For Whom the Bells Won’t Toll
…And Justice for all.
“Oranges Pretty Much Are The Only Fruit, ‘Cause You’re Not Getting Wedding Cake”
“Marriage on My Mind….NOT”
“And the Wedding Band Played On- Except for the Gays”
I love these but I’m glad you didn’t have to use them.
Something about “Twilight: Inequality” makes me die laughing. Maybe its the weed I’m smoking. Or maybe its just funny. The world may never know.
no, it made me laugh too. and i’m not stoned.
that was mine, i’m REALLY funny and that’s why you laughed
It’s the optimism that carried us though.
11. OH MY GOD 11!
“The Pride of the Prejudiced”?
The h8 locker
I say “potato,” you say “fuck you, you can’t get gay married.”
good one, haha
I like this. Because I am the kind of person that is really pessimistic about things, in an attempt to lower my expectations. Because then if something good actually happens, it is like 100 times better. And … I LOVE the fact that the headline is a play off “One Art.” I love Elizabeth Bishop. Hard.
Californian Hearts of Darkness
Tripping the Velvet
The Incredibly True Adventure of Two Girls In Love Who Could Not Get Married
the ‘oranges’ one made me lol for real :)
Weahtering Hates! Wonderful.
If you’re going to San Francisco, be sure to wear some flowers in your hair,
But not as a bridesmaid at a gay wedding, because that is illegal.
Something old, something new, something borrowed and anything else as long as it’s totally heterosexual.
California Lesbians: Jilted at the Alternative Lifestyle Haircut
The Marriage of Fagaros: from comedy to tragedy
California does not believe in tears.
A day in a life of a second class citizen
Gay rights year zero
Can I share my own funny too? Slightly related?
Yesterday when we all were waiting for the ruling, which was supposed to be released at noon but was released late, I described Judge Walker as “Queer Rights Cocktease Extraordinaire.”
And us, “ah baby! I’m blueballing for equality!! JUST THE TIP PLZ”
I Left My Rights In San Francisco
Better Than Wedding Cake (Or So You Tell Yourself Because You Can’t Have It)
The Runaway Brides (To Iowa)
Annie On My Mind, But Not On My Health Insurance Plan
A+ on that last one
I probably should have told you all in advance that legally speaking, the grounds for granting a stay would have been pretty shaky, huh? Then there would be less humor in the world (no listicles), but also less anxiety.
Sorry. Next time.