Lindsay Lohan Goes to Rehab, Makes Art, Sees Samantha Ronson

LINDSAY LOHAN:

If we ever end up in rehab and are granted three wishes, they would be a visit from the ex-girlfriend, art supplies, and mashed potatoes. Lindsay got two out of three which ain’t bad. She probably didn’t even want mashed potatoes, so.

Lindsay checked into Pickford Lofts last night, a sober living facility owned by Lindsay’s new lawyer Robert Shapiro who you may remember from the OJ Simpson trial. They hope the move into Pickford Lofts will help Lindsay negotiate out of the 90-day jail sentence and 90 days of rehab she’s expected to serve beginning Monday.

Yesterday Lindsay was visited by her friend Eliat Anschel, her Mom Dina and her sister Ali. Her assistant Eleanor brought her some Sprite and art supplies. Samantha Ronson then paid Lindsay a visit at around 10 pm. This gives us very positive, hopeful feelings because, like we keep saying, we can’t help but care.

Pickford Lofts offers each resident “a large living room with a flat-screen HD cable and DVD player, a sofa, two recliners, coffee & end tables, wireless high-speed internet access” which means @lindsaylohan must still in business, amirite? Oddly enough, Lindsay Lohan’s twitter, generally a hotbed of secret coded messages about lesbianism requiring our immediate dissection & attention, has been light on feelings over the last 24 hours. Instead, @lindsaylohan has provided enthusiastic endorsements for Fashion Bay, One Kings Lane (great deals on home decor & gifts!), and most recently/weirdly — the tech company Norton.

Apparently Norton and Lohan have teamed up to “warn fans” that “searching for details of [Lindsay’s] latest predicament could result in their computers being infected by cyber criminals.” The solution is, of course, to purchase “Norton Safe Web” and to “use a safe search tool, like the free Norton Safe Web Lite, which can identify poisoned search results.” Also don’t click on links that promise Jailhouse photos of Lindsay Lohan. That seems like a no-brainer, espesh since after Telephone really who needs more bisexual jailhouse photos? Not us.

In other news:

COMIC-CON: Westboro Baptist Church will be protesting Comic-Con because of “idol-worship.”

JANELLE MONAE: Performed at the ESPY Awards, and everybody loved it. You should be listening to her record right now because you bought it for Audiostraddle Record Club, right?

DEGRASSI: Degrassi will be introducing its first transgender character, Adam, an FTM: “This will be an ongoing character, this will be someone who’ll be around his whole high school experience, so we want to make sure that this character is loved (and) develops a fanbase.”

PRETTY LITTLE LIARS: AfterEllen interviews Bianca Lawson, who plays Emily’s lesbian love interest on Pretty Little Liars.

ANGELINA JOLIE: “The world’s most famous Hollywood humanitarian might not have single-handedly erased gender inequality in the movie industry, but she sure has struck a major blow for actresses. How else to explain her $20 million payout for Sony’s next big summer release, “Salt,” an action project that originally was written to star a man — no less than Tom Cruise?”

Riese is the 37-year-old CEO, CFO and Editor-in-Chief of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, blogger, fictionist, copywriter, video-maker, low-key Jewish power lesbian and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and then headed West. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image & Other Hazards Of Being Female," magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 2795 articles for us.

8 Comments

  1. Psst…The first Janelle Monae link goes to the comicon article. (Not that I minded reading it twice; Fred Phelps vs. the fanboys should be the most exciting comic book battle we’ve had in years!)

  2. I wish Lindsay would just go to jail, do her time and get it over with. The next 5 days are going to long I for people who are following this.

    Off Topic, but can’t help but mention that MTV is playing a T&S video as I type this.

  3. i would bet my whole micromachines collection that the ftm character on degrassi will be more human and sympathetic and fleshed out in his first ten minutes of screen time than max fucking sweeney was for the entire run of the L word. i am still so mad about that.

    i hope lindsay’s doing art therapy it would probably help. i for one would love to see her fucked up drawings.

  4. I wish I had been able to go to a rehab with living rooms and HDTVs and high speed internet. Instead, I got diet caffeine-free coke and card games (the one that could be played with 51 cards or less, of course). I also wish Samantha Ronson had visited me. But god, LiLo’s life sucks, tho, don’t it?

  5. Late comment but…

    Just to let you know, sober living is not rehab. What I mean is, it’s not rehabilitation. It is a living facility for people with the common goal of maintaining sobriety. That’s why she is allowed so many visits and has such good facilities in her room. More info here:
    http://www.treatment-centers.net/sober-living.html
    I’m saying this because on tv the other day was ‘LOHAN CHECKS INTO REHAB TO AVOID JAIL’ it was then followed by a rolling script saying ‘ACTRESS CHECKS INTO SOBER LIVING FACILITY’. Well, sober living is called sober living and not rehab for a reason. It’s for those who have finished a rehab stint and want continued support. I’m not suprised that she is there. Who wants to post $30,000 for a third relapse?

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