Monty apologizes to Stef and Lena about the Great Kissing Debacle of 2015, so Stef decides to let her live.
Jude and Connor come out, and Monty finally stops keeping her lips to herself.
Lena and Stef keep secrets from each other, and it is not good. Worse, though, is Jude and/or Connor gets shot!
Lena and Stef chat about some sexy handcuff situations, while Jude and Connor kiss right on the mouth.
Stef and Lena agree to let Callie go, and Rosie’s got a brand new house.
The kids all leave the house for one night, so Stef and Lena get down to the serious business of drinking wine and scissoring.
Jude and Connor pinky hug while Stef and Lena glower at each other.
Lena teaches Stef to twerk, says the phrase “heteronormative thinking,” continues to be flawless.
Stef and Lena take down the pillow wall, get naked … and talk about their kids.
Lena and Stef’s gaggle of children make it impossible for them to get their scissor on. Again.
Stef almost Stefs-up Christmas, but Lena swoops in to save the day.
Can we talk about Season 2 of The Fosters? Because I feel like we need to talk about it.
The Fosters is back! You’re excited. Let’s talk about it.
“That’s right — the characters on this show abusing their power has become so commonplace that I am now desensitized and can only think of denim.”
“Stef and I say, “Nothing intimate about that!” and then Stef and I laugh, but the Serious Music of Relationship Doom starts and Stef and I know we’ve made a terrible mistake.”
“Brandon tells Dani he’ll pay her back but she says it was a gift and giving makes her happy, happy, happy! Then, she says she has one request and I don’t want to know what it is. I pause the show, eat Skittles and consider quitting the recapping life.”
This makes no sense. You would hand out a letter to each person as they arrive, starting with the first. Brandon arrived last which means he should have been left with the last “S.” YOU CANNOT JUST HAND OUT LETTERS RANDOMLY!
“The combination of lesbians and hummus is always funny to me. I’m easy.”
Remember all the hope I had for Brandon? My hope is Humpty Dumpty and all the kings horses and all the kings lesbians will never put my hope for this character back together again.
“The doorbell rings and it’s Emma the Wrestler with noodle kugel! We get a little primer on how Jews respond to funerals. Hint: They bring kugel. Every time they say “kugel,” I hear “kegel” and do 15.”
Stef is watering the bushes when Lena gets home from the doctor and says, “Have fun at the gyno?” Lena says, “It’s more action than I’ve gotten from you in awhile.”