PHOTO GALLERY: Queer in the Bedroom

Torre McGee / 35 / Construction Laborer, High-End Residential

“This room really belongs more to my cat, Shoga, than me. He does let me primp, sleep and have sex in there though. I couldn’t pick one favorite thing in my room, it’s full of antiques, vintage clothes, crystals and handmade treasures from various loved ones.”


Molly Cate / 27 / Alabama / Receptionist

“The fairy lights above my bed are the first DIY project I ever completed, and they’re my favorite decoration in the entire apartment. The curtain rod is probably an inch off level, but I’m still proud of myself for making something beautiful.”


Rowan / 26 / Charlottesville, VA / Tech Worker, Van Lover, Vest Collector

“I closed off a living room in a big old house some friends were living in, added some “closets,” and moved in.  My goal is to make my van into a livable space and travel, but for now it’s nice to have so much room for my tools and growing vest collection.”


Bridget / 28 / Orange County, CA

“I love my room. It’s temporary, and many of my rooms have felt very similar, but this one is especially cozy and inviting and lovely and nothing matches but I love it all. Organizing my bookshelf by rainbow color was extremely stressful, but I love it, so it’s probably my favorite thing. I also have a lot of happy art of fairies and shit.”


Mara / 23 / Salt Lake City, UT / Arthouse Cinema Popcorn Scooper

“My room is a collection of found, gifted, inherited, and made things. My roommate says it feels like a museum, which I think is damn flattering.”


Tess, Tara (photographer), Raphael, Carmen; with Korra and Bolin the Cats / 29, 28, 3, 1 / Melbourne, Australia / Swim Teacher; Barista

“When we moved in we had big plans to redo our bedroom, and we made one rule, our bedroom was our grown up space for just us. A year later, the kids have taken over and the only remodelling we’ve done is installing floating shelves so our cats have ladder access to the top of the wardrobe.”


Emily / 22 / Fort Collins, CO / Student

“On one of the walls that did not make it in the picture I have a The Hobbit poster that features Gandalf with a handmade paper Santa hat that my roommate made my first semester of college. The poster, including the hat, have come with me on multiple moves and when I graduate I want to get the whole thing framed. (Freshman roommate and I are still BFFs and roommates four years later.)”


Cee Webster / 38 / Portland, OR / Tech Director, Autostraddle

“Shown are my three partners who often share this room with me, from left to right: Torre, Serina and Quinn. I’m standing in the back. My bedroom is tiny but we make it work.”


Quinn / 26 / Portland, OR / Electrical Worker

“I bought my first ever bed frame when I moved in to this house and it is my favorite. It makes me feel like a passable adult, provides a place to hang my quilting project, and is the perfect cat-snuggling spot.”


Erica, Jen, Bagheera / 30, 29, 7 / East Orange, NJ / Nanny, Artist; Warehouse Associate, Filmmaker / Permanent Pain In The Ass

“Erica’s favorite space in the room is her makeup table because it her own little area in the apt. My (Jen) favorite area is my desk because it’s where I keep my collections of batman stuff, X-Files stuff, 8mm cameras, and Erica’s fearful thoughts about my collections leading to hoarding.”


Kirstie / 25 / Oakland, CA / Consultant for Institutional Repository Admins

“One of my favorite things in my room is the Captain America shield pillow that my girlfriend made for me! Also gotta love the giant bi flag a friend gifted to me.”


Monique / 27 / Tucson, AZ / Kindergarten Teacher

“I’ve never really been able to decorate my rooms in any particular way because poverty, but now that I have a steady job I want to try. I have no idea how though. As far as what I think of before falling asleep/after waking up: literally all of my worries at the same time. I guess my bed is my favorite place to have panic attacks.”


Jacqueline / 23 / Shanghai, China / Student, Teacher, Student Teacher

“I moved to Shanghai last week to teach EFL (English as a Foreign Language) for four months. I unpacked to take this photo.”


Kiona and Calcifer the cat) / 24 / London, UK / PhD Student

“Student life means I don’t sleep here (or anywhere) as much as I should, but my bed is also my favorite place to write papers and code. The first thing people tend to comment on when seeing my room for the first time is that I leave my lube on the nightstand, and that that makes me seem ‘really confident’. It’s mostly laziness, but I appreciate the sentiment.”


Chelsea / 27 / West End, Brisbane / Mechanical Engineer

“We’ve just moved to a new place this week, so I haven’t quite decided what my favourite thing is yet. I do like that it has more light and is cooler than our last place and also that I can play Occarina of Time from my bed.”


Amelia / 27 / West End, Brisbane / PhD Candidate

“We’ve just moved house and my room is in its optimal config. My favourite items are milk crate shoe tower (not pictured), the piece of art on my wall, and the concrete double-ended dildo on the shelf. The last two are from emerging artists in Brisbane. Also whisky.”


Stephanie / 23 / Richmond, VA / Grad Student, Brunch Host

“My two favorite things about my room are the big windows and the no-longer-functioning fireplace that I like to put candles and flowers on. Bed (and cat) not pictured.”


Bri / 27 / Upstate NY / Grad Student

“Each morning, I lie in bed with a mug of hot tea and watch the sun rise over the Adirondacks while my fiancee dozes on my shoulder. It is perfect and it is perfect everyday.”


Bella (with roommates Valerie and Gowri) / 21 / Pittsburgh, PA / Engineering Major

“Life, school, and interpersonal interaction can be extremely draining. Coming home every day to my room, my happy plant family, and especially my roommates has been a near-constant source of happiness and restorative energy for me over the past two years. I am so grateful for these two goofy ladies.”


Rachel Sanzo / 28 / New York, NY / Freelance Writer, Nanny

“As I fall asleep, I like to imagine exactly how many kittens I could fit inside all these cupboards.”


Julie and son / 35, 12 / Boston, MA / Teacher

“I gave my ex-wife the house in the divorce, and I’m mostly indifferent about my place. But I built this platform bed with my own hands (and a handsaw and power drill) and made my own author word search wall “art”. So my bedroom is definitely my favorite room. Little guy likes to cuddle and look for writers in the word search (usually on a Sunday morning when I want to sleep).


Heather Hogan / 38 / Astoria, NY / Autostraddle’s Senior Editor

“My bedroom is my favorite place on earth. It’s warm in the winter and cool in the summer and tidy and comfortable and best of all it’s where I get to go to sleep and wake up beside Stacy every day. There’s a lot of good books in here too, and video games, and usually cats.”


Sally and Gillian / 34, 30 / Winchester, UK / Software Development Manager; Textile Designer

“Sally reads bad lesbian science fiction and drinks tea. Gillian reads about hedgerows and drinks tea. They both wonder why the duvet is so fucking small.”


Maria Vashakidze / 29 / Portland, OR / Owner of Seagrape Bath & Body Apothecary

“My bedroom is my serene place to dream, create, and recharge. I usually think about the last thing I read or watched before I fall asleep. That tends to get incorporated into my dreams in one way or another. I have vivid dreams almost every night so I wake up and journal or draw to process what I remember in the morning. I set my own schedule therefore sleep is never rushed and my mornings tend to be pretty leisurely.


Stephanie / 26 / Baldwin, NY / IT Purchasing Assistant at NYU

“I’m living at home while I save up to buy my own place (hoping to move out next year, fingers crossed!), so I’m still in my childhood bedroom. I LOVE my room, it’s definitely my favorite space in our house. It’s gone through many decorative phases and paint colors over the years, but this one is by far my favorite. My room is westward-facing, so when the sun sets, it glows like it’s on fire and I think it’s super magical. My favorite item in my room would have to be my bookshelf; it houses all of my favorite books, and it doubles as a shrine to all of my anime paraphernalia, with a particular focus on my Sailor Moon obsession.”

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Laneia is the Executive Editor and founding member of Autostraddle, and you're the reason she's here. She's 37, has two kids, two dogs, one cat, one Megan, and some personal essays.

Laneia has written 879 articles for us.

102 Comments

  1. Hey Bee from Sacramento! I am also living in Sacramento! We should meet up! We also have a NorCal straddlers group and I have been trying forever to get an IRL meetup going there!
    Love everyone’s pets and plants! I missed the deadline for this but I think I might post a picture of my room in the comments later.

  2. It never would’ve occurred to me to take multiple pictures and now there’s so much I wanna share with you! The poem on my wall. The Converse piggy bank my old nanny kid and I painted together. The fox pillow, the quotes, the way everything turns pink from the salt lamps at night. The framed pic of the porcupine in love with a cactus. It’s all there, and you can’t see any of it!

    Next time 😀

  3. Erin, 28, Ontario – judge you? Who would do such a thing? You tell me and I’ll punch them in the nose (unless immediately after the photo was taken you won at connect 4 then danced round the room gloating until your kid cried. Then I think I’d consider judging you pretty harshly).

  4. I love this! It is so exciting to see myself up here with all you amazing people and I echo Queer Girl’s sentiment that I wish I would have taken more pictures. Next time.
    I also now want to purchase all the fairy lights, make my own curtains, and buy more books so I can be as amazing as you all.
    I love seeing you beautiful humans. You are awesome and your hair looks really good today 🙂

  5. Pigeon of Kent! Your Ghostbusters prints! Well, the one, and I can’t make out the one below fully but it also looks like Ghostbusters.

    and Kells the Librarian-ISH! Yay for more FL straddlers.

  6. so awesome to see some other Charleston, SC folks on here. (we should have an autostraddle meet up, even if its super small!)

    Such a great post, this was very interesting. thanks! 🙂

  7. I love seeing everyone’s spaces and it makes me feel happy and proud that I am part of this awesome community <3

    Also I've realised my bedroom was pretty minimalist in comparison to most, apparently I don't give enough credit to the Virgo side of my Virgo/Libra cusp!

    Can't wait for the next assignment!

  8. So beautiful!!! I love all the little window gardens people have! My room does not have enough good light for that but I wish!
    Side note: Where are the +1 buttons??? I want to +1 everyone’s comments!

  9. i love how many of us have the same ikea herb-ish wildflower vaguely witchy bedspread cover. you can’t tell in the picture but i’m sitting on mine in my picture, and the person above me is wrapped in the same blanky. synchronicity!

    also, sionnain: seeing other thoughtful queer bookworms from long island makes me feel slightly less alone in the world, even though i haven’t lived there in so long.

    • Ocean! It was, in a lot of ways, not the easiest place to grow up queer, but it was even longer ago for you. I think you’ll be happy to know that I’m running a queer book club for high school kids, and the queer kids I know who are growing up here now are so amazing. They give me hope.

      • yay! i am so glad things have gotten better. i met my first girlfriend in the 90s because she saw the rainbow sticker on my riot grrrl lunchbox and we used to make out in the food court at roosevelt field and people were so mean to us but we did it for the closeted queer girls and cos we liked each other. Anyway, you rule!

  10. Lots of cosy bedrooms! I definitely don’t feel at all weird about having cats, random stuff on the walls and fairy lights in my room anymore, although I am per definition an adult.
    I live in Norway, and over here everyone pretty much has the same layout when it comes to bedding. Thus, I am intrigued by what seems to be duvets with no cover at all? Is this a common thing in the US?

    • Yes! Cultural differences in bedding are interesting. I noticed in Europe people use duvet covers but no top sheet sometimes. We (my corner of America) sleep between two sheets with then an uncovered duvet/quilt/comforter/blanket on top.

  11. Vest collector is a title I would like to aspire to and probably could.

    But those trans Pride flags being used as DIY decorative curtains.
    Brilliant, I love it.

    When AS gets to queer in the bathroom tho call me up.
    Need to show off my duct tape patching of the hole in my wall.
    I feel it represents my life right now.

  12. I now want a dating app that shows pictures of bedrooms instead of (or in addition to?) bedrooms. You learn so much more about people from their effing cute bedrooms. Call it Slumbr?

  13. my girlfriend and I are ready to close our Somerville-Jamaica Plain divide and Uhaul it to Roslindale.

    That’s one of the lesbian-est sentences I’ve read in a while.

  14. These galleries are so captivating and calming and I’m even more excited than usual to go to bed now.
    This whole series gave me serious bedspread envy, however. I need to up my game.

  15. I really enjoyed this series! I’ve lived in my new place (my first apartment all to myself) for nearly a year and haven’t yet finished decorating my bedroom, so I definitely drew some inspiration from these lovely humans.

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