Glee 302 Recap: I Am Unicorn Plan-ner

Kurt’s auditioning for the romantic male lead by hopping around a play structure like Curious George Goes To the Olympics while singing a song from Funny Girl about being the biggest star in the whole wide world. It’s spectacular but also entirely irrelevant to the role he’s auditioning for.

and this is how kurt snagged the lead role in jumanji

Perhaps he’s just attempting to prove his skills at this:

Or this?

Or maybe this?

Regardless it’s an A+ audition for Funny Girl.

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Puck, ’cause he’s too dumb to grasp the depths of Quinn’s ability to shock him, shock him, shock him with her deviant behavior, pleas with Quinn to subscribe to GOOP and hold the baby and make cooing noises like in the cotton commercials.

listen, i hooked up with this girl romi and she said she could turn that dangly bit into a native feather. just say the word, novia

Puck: “You look like a Real Housewife of Reno.”

Puck says Beth will surely be messed up raised as a little chicklet in a house with a loving mother if Quinn doesn’t bestow her smoky hotness and sharp wit upon the child.dotted-divider2

Rachel’s their top choice for Maria, but Miss Tupperware says Mercedes has “the most soulful voice” — I mean who will they pick. It will have to be a diva-off.

hey beiste, hey emma, hey artie, where's the party

Let’s talk Tony. Y’all it is presently 7:15 on Thursday PM and if I don’t finish this tonight then I am going to lie on Pablo The Neighborhood Cat until he eats my hands off and I have a good excuse not to write this recap. The thing is that Pablo is very peaceful and would never bite me. We want to start a tumblr about Pablo called pabloisintheway.tumblr.com. I’m always like “Pablo! Pablo I’m gonna run over you in my bike if you don’t move!” He’s fat, and he had fleas so he got this random haircut that looks like when you’re drunk cutting your friend’s hair, like it was in chunks? And even as it grows out, it looks more amazing, and Pablo sitting there looking at you like, “I ain’t movin’, bitch,” is like hilariously funny, which you would know if we started that tumblr.

This episode may have been spectacular, it might be my own attitude/exhaustion that’s the problem. If anyone reading this has CEO experience, please email me.

Coach Beiste: “No question, he owned that song like it was his prison bitch. My only concern is Tony’s supposed to be from the streets, an alpha gang member. I look at Kurt and I don’t believe it.”

It’s high time Kurt learns that listening in on other people talking about you is always really fucking depressing:

something's comin' alright

Artie: “Kurt may be a little delicate for Tony.”

You know what that means, right?

Kurt is extremely too gay for this:

He’s also WAAAAYYY TOO GAY for this:

And like, so gay he goes all the way past this and back to gay again, which is far too gay for this:

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Following Kurt’s oppressive homosexual snooping experience, he experiences an open-air homosexual experience and I’m not talking about The Roman Baths. I’m talking about some serious collaging skills:

it screams "monogomish"

Kurt just about loses his few remaining marbles and Brittany, per always, is like “why don’t you see yourself as lovely as I see you?” and it’s because Kurt, JUST LIKE ME AND MAYBE YOU, overthinks everything and makes it all so complicated when really it’s not at all complex or deep or insurmountable — you are who you are, you get better with age and refinement, and ideally you’ll reach the age of 30 with enough self-esteem to grab your own life by the bulging pink fun sacks and ride your unicorn into the sunset.

Brittany: “I don’t know why you’re so upset. You’re special.”

Obviously her bff, Santana, who was #robbedinthisepisode, and I guess is still allegedly “not in Glee Club” ’cause of homophobic misogyny, gives her a pep talk because that’s what girl friends do for girl friends.

No but really – – Santana takes off the bitch mask and gets real with Brittany these days, and I think that means that she’s opening up — even if it’s just a little bit — to the idea of giving love, of being vulnerable, of taking love, too. These two are just fucking adorable.

Santana: “No look, this campaign is brilliant. And if he doesn’t get that, then he doesn’t deserve to have you as his campaign manager. There’s no one like you. You’re a genius, Brittany. You’re the unicorn.”

They’re totally scissoring. Or else using that unicorn horn as a thigh strap-on.

baby i'd let you run my campaign like a tiger

I’m glad they’re so focused on Kurt’s image and how his sexuality is incorporated into the campaign because that’s the most important part of student council — not tater tot campaigns or homecoming planning — but how you feel about your sexuality and gender identity. dotted-divider2

Kurt, wearing tights and a billowy medieval jumpsuit situation, has decided to prove his “masculine power” by performing a scene from Romeo & Juliet with a really bad hairstyle, just like straight guys.

shall i compare you to a summer's day or a summer's eve

The judges can’t stop laughing and eventually Lea can’t stop laughing either, so that’s the end of that scene I was closing my eyes and screaming for the entirety of.

def better than cats

Also, once again for your reference, the manly men of West Side Story:

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So here we are at the part of the recap where if I wake up on Friday morning and this shit hasn’t been published, I might never write another email again. So let’s knock this shit out, shall we?

SO UM bababy bababybbabbybyy.

Shelby: “I know what happened to you, it’s the same thing that happened to me when I gave up Rachel.”

PROJECTING.

look let's just sing take me or leave me and call it a fucking NIGHt am i right

Shelby: “First step to becoming an adult, stop punishing yourself for things you did as a child.”

Quinn sees baby on iPhone, has nice nails:

you'll let her see that hair but not my hair?

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Um, Rachel and Finn are in the carshop GO GREASE LIGHTNING and Rachel thinks Finn should dream big, keeps pumping up his ego about whatever, being special, when really she should just go to NYMADHADA and find a nice boyfriend who isn’t a lesbian but might be gay. Call it “Me and My Hag.”

i know you think auto mechanics is a growth industry but nothing is easier than getting a job in the performing arts!

Finn wants to work at the autoshop and Rachel is classist.

Rachel: “You’re better than that. you may not know it but i do.”
Finn: “You’re the best girlfriend ever.”

Nothing like that girl from the hot tub.dotted-divider2

Kurt and his Dad having a conversation about um, masculinity. It’s actually a kinda annoying convo only saved by Blaine’s performance at the end proving that um, gay men can play straight what is this NEWSWEEK?!

Burt: “Dude you’re gay. You’re gay. And you’re not like Rock Hudson gay, you’re really gay. You sing like Diana Ross and you dress like you own a magic chocolate factory.”
Kurt: “Why are you being so mean to me?”
Burt: “There’s nothing wrong with that, it’s who you are.”
Kurt: “If I wanna be an actor I have to pass as straight to get those big romantic roles and I want those roles. Every actor does.”

La la la la talkity talk talk.

Burt’s solution is for Kurt to write his own movies and plays, which is an even better career opportunity than simply performing in movies and plays. Maybe he can get something on the “here! network.”

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Dance Dance Dance Revolution! Finn falls on his goofy ass.

Then Quinn shows up dressed like Alice in Wonderland, rejoins.

So now Quinn wants full custody GAH WHY

blow job face

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Brittany admires her work, which is amaze. Kurt likes it now too and wants to hang out to plan his campaign and eat some fat-free nonsense.

this would make a really great coaster

Brittany has decided to run for student council too. This means she’ll have to sleep with everyone including Santana. SCORE!

Also she’s bisexual:

Brittany’s starting to believe in her own magic, which I think means her and Santana are riding the hobby horse.dotted-divider2

Then Blaine kills it, eats it, and says STICK A FORK IN ME I’M DONE

kurt has to be at least a little turned on by this

The end! I wish the Brittana parts had been in the beginning when I was still young

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Riese

Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3184 articles for us.

66 Comments

  1. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it gleefully again: Jenny’s strap-on hobbyhorse (which Niki loves riding) rules all hobbyhorses talked about by Riese! I absolutely love that phrase, Riese. It’s hilarious.

    Back to the show/recap. Can we seriously stop having the same situation with Kurt every single episode? Please, Ryan Murphy? We get it. He’s gay. Why must we have this Kurt-changes-himself then Kurt-accepts-his-gaymo-self every single episode? I’m not saying it’s not an important storyline. It is. Very much so. But it’s just every single episode the same general situation with Kurt.

    I missed Santana this episode. I thought that the scene with Puck and the baby was pretty poignant. I expected it to be overly sugary but that scene as well as Quinn’s scene with the baby was actually quite moving.

    • I could not possibly agree more with this:

      “Can we seriously stop having the same situation with Kurt every single episode? Please, Ryan Murphy? We get it. He’s gay. Why must we have this Kurt-changes-himself then Kurt-accepts-his-gaymo-self every single episode? I’m not saying it’s not an important storyline. It is. Very much so. But it’s just every single episode the same general situation with Kurt.”

  2. Sometimes Glee’s lack of continuity just about kills me. This whole baby thing is set upon the idea that way back when, Rachel was given up for adoption. She wasn’t. Shelby was a surrogate, okaaaaaaaaaaay? Gosh.

    • Blaine’s age annoys me too. He was introduced to be in the year above Kurt and all mentory and stuff… and then they’re in the same year… and now Darren’s younger? SO CONFOOS.

  3. My favourite part was the Empire Records reference.

    That said, I hate this show and I can’t figure out why I watch it anymore. It must be the cheerleaders.

  4. So when Shelby says, “When I gave up Rachel for adoption…” I started screaming, “YOU WERE A SURROGATE. OH MY FUCKING GOD.”

    Is it just me or is that entire storyline incredibly offensive? Like, somehow biology will alllllllllways trump everything and YOU HAVE TO HAVE YOUR BIRTHPARENTS IN YOUR LIFE OR YOU WILL LIVE A LIFE MISSPENT.

    I might be projecting a tiny bit here because I know the only way I will have children is through a) adoption or b) some nice man giving my wife and me some of his man gunk and there are courts out there that would actually give *more* rights to the man-gunk-giver than the non-birthparent and GHAHJSKFLJSHDCJNZXLUEHRSJ anyway.

    • Amen. Let me just say that I really did enjoy the birth mother plot in season one, but even then I had reservations. I was really upset by the implication that a young woman raised by two male parents would necessarily feel as if her childhood were inadequate because she didn’t have a mother (cf. Rachel referring to her “lost childhood” in “Theatricality”.) But I suppressed those reservations because I felt they were particular and not necessarily generalized– that Rachel is allowed to feel longing for her birth mother, as some people do. Besides, the show offered some countering to that narrative: Shelby telling Rachel that she is her mother, but not her mom, and realizing this when Rachel tells her the story about her dads bringing her water at night. It still kind of upset me, though, that in an episode written by a gay man, it was implied that children of gay parents will feel a deep longing for a parent of a different gender.

      But now– ugh. That trope is reiterated to the extreme, with none of the gloss of the first season… the implication that Quinn and especially Puck have a right to have access to their birth child is problematic, but more than that, there’s this sense that all adopted children are broken without connection to their birth parents, or that all birth mothers spend the rest of their lives longingly aching for what they lost. It’s true of some people, but it’s not a general rule. And this show (thus far) does a pretty poor job at showing that adoptive parents are, you know, actually parents. The fact that Rachel continually refers to her parents as “my two gay dads” while saying things to Shelby like “there is so much you can teach me… so much only you can teach me”, really does not help legitimize the validity of relationships between children and their adoptive parents.

      I don’t know. I mean, I know people who are adopted and who have really wanted to meet their birth parents, but usually that’s within the context of wanting to understand where they come from, not feeling that their lives/relationships with their actual parents are meaningless without it. I also know people who are adopted who have no desire whatsoever to find their birth parents. It just seems like a pretty irresponsible way to handle a delicate storyline… but then, it is Glee.

    • she was a surrogate? i forgot/didn’t realize that! it IS very offensive to compare it to actual adoption without a disclaimer or figuring it into the equation.

      i’m adopted and i find it outraging that Quinn would attempt to get her baby back. i hope Glee doesn’t write that story.

      i think i’m going to have to admit glee is just another poorly written television show. and the musical choices/performances have lost my interest as well.

    • well, as probs indicated in the recap, i agree. the idea that rachel is lost without her birth mom and her birth mom is lots without the baby she surrogate parented/gave up for adoption — just so retro. i thought it was remarkably old-fashioned and honestly i just didn’t buy it! quinn has never cared before about her baby, and shelby’s monologue about how it was wrong to be a working mother made me upset also. there’s nothing wrong with being a stay-at-home mom or a working mom, both are good moms.

      also if this custody plot actually happens i’m going to be so annoyed. especially since um, it would never work in real life and quinn and puck are unfit parents. it’s also evil.

      • The problem with Glee is that they let the Internet write the show, and last season everyone was up in arms like, QUINN GAVE UP HER BABY WHY DO THEY NEVER MENTION THAAAT?!. Well fuck, maybe because she GAVE IT UP, and it’s done?! Maybe she’s moved on with her life like she should? But no, it’s gotta be a plot point now.

        • I agree with this, but I also feel like there’s a happy medium between ignoring the traumatic experiences Quinn experienced in season one and expecting Quinn and Puck to be in contact with Beth, you know?

          • Yeah, that’s how I feel. I felt like the complete reset button they did on Quinn last season was completely weird. However, this whole thing where she suddenly wants to be a parent now, and thinks she has the right to take Beth away from a mom who can actually provide a good home for her – complete crap.

          • I feel like Beth is just a pawn in Quinn’s spiteful games, rather than Quinn’s ultimate goal. It’s too bad Glee will fail utterly at showing and exploring that kind of storyline though.

      • I didn’t get from that scene that they were saying there was anything wrong with being a working mom. Shelby just realized she didn’t like it, and she wanted to be with Beth more. And she’s still a working mom, just working less hours I guess? IDK, I don’t really care why she’s there as long as Idina keeps wearing those pencil skirts and singing.

  5. This is moderately relevant, but regardless a cute, intelligent girl in a nicely edited veedeoooo –

    http://www.feministfrequency.com/2011/07/tropes-vs-women-5-the-mystical-pregnancy/

    “Tropes vs. Women explores the reoccurring stories, themes and representations of women in Hollywood films and TV shows.

    The Mystical Pregnancy is a trope writers use to create drama and terror by invading, violating and exploiting women’s reproductive capabilities. Often these female characters have their ovaries harvested by aliens or serve as human incubators for demon spawn. Sometimes they are carrying the Messiah and other times Satan himself.”

    I wouldn’t be surprised if Ryan tried to pull that one off bbbbbut this is relevant to your reply Dina —>

    “The mystical pregnancy is one of the plot devices that I loathe the most because while other tropes represent women in stereotypical ways, this one hits us on a biological level. Yes some of us are physically capable of having babies but no that does not mean you get to take advantage of, and abuse, that for the sake of your story.”

  6. Thank you to those who pointed it out! I kept yelling at the TV that she was a surrogate, she didn’t give anyone up. She chose to rent her womb to two fabulous gay men, and thus we have Rachel Berry.

    Also, every time Will walks into the choir room and says “Big news!” it makes me think of Futurama and Professor Farnsworth always shuffling in and saying “Good news everyone!” Which makes Glee that much more hilarious.

    • I thought the same thing about Will’s entrance, and it makes me want to put sporks in my eyes because IT IS RUINING THE PROFESSOR’S ENTRANCE.

  7. Christ, if Santana doesn’t do something gay in the next episode I’m going to… … …well, I’ll keep watching, but I’ll be very irritated by it.

    Also, Quinn’s new look really reminds me of Gwen Stefani circa Tragic Kingdom days. Is it the pink hair? Or the fact that she sort of looks like her with her impossibly perfect features? Or the ‘fuck your face’ attitude? I don’t know or care… but I just wish it would stick around.

  8. My friends and I have changed drinking for Glee to drinking with Glee. Our drinking game consists of two rules: drink when you’re offended and drink when you don’t care.

    I had to stop half way through for fear of blacking out.

    • It was in the first episode, where they also mention that she was conceived via surrogate. The joke was that they had mixed their spermz together and Rachel thought it was just sooo romantic that to that day they didn’t know which one was her biological father, like some kind of Schrodinger’s daddy situation, where as long as they don’t know who the biological father is, they are both the biodad. (It’s a funny because one of her dads is black and one is white.)

    • Some genius person on a messageboard I frequent suggested Taye Diggs and Anthony Rapp should play Rachel’s dads. Then Rachel would be 100% RENT BABY.

  9. Riese, your West Side Story casting was brilliant
    I apent the entire episode wondering who was going to play Anybodys…

  10. Burt’s speech about Kurt embracing his inner-unicorn reminds me of Ramin Setoodeh’s Gay Actors: Ramin Setoodeh on How Hollywood Shuts Them Out (http://www.autostraddle.com/newsweek-publishes-more-crap-71602/). The arguments that gay actors are too gay to play straight or only gay actors should play gay is ludicrous.
    They act. Their job, by its very nature, requires them to convince their audience that they are characters who are sometimes not at all similar to who they are in real life. Gay actors can play straight and vice versa.
    I appreciate the tone of Burt’s speech (Be yourself, little unicorn!), but this misses the mark, especially after Ryan Murphy was openly critical about Setoodeh’s piece.

    • yeah i mentioned that in the recap, that newsweek story and ramin setoodeh. i was really surprised to have that conversation go down. if blaine hadn’t killed it in the last scene, i would’ve been in a hot rage.

    • Ehh… I agree with Burt’s dad for the moment. Kurt is too much of himself in the roles he claims everyone wants. He’s going to either accept roles where he can be himself or become a better actor… Because so far I’m not convinced. And the point of acting to is to convince the audience, not yourself. Plus there are plenty of gay men who play straight characters and straight actors who play gay characters.

      For Kurt his issue isn’t his sexuality. His issue is his personality. He’s going to have the same issue someone like Zooey Deschanel has. She gets casted as the whimsical spacey hipster because that’s her. Not because she only has sex with whimsical spacey hipsters.

      • i agree but i think the problem with this scene is that it was his sexual orientation blamed for his inability to play straight roles, not his personality/gender presentation, which implied those things are synonymous.

        • I agree. But I don’t think it was implied that they are synonymous because I didn’t get that. I thought the articulation was in hetero speak, which isn’t all that articulate when it comes to discussion on anything that isn’t status-quo normative. Ryan Murphy’s idea of connecting with audiences that aren’t us? Lay-man? Idk.

          Burt’s spiel on Rock Hudson was as articulate as it’s going to get.

        • I agree with everyone here but I feel the need to interrupt and say that as a former choir nerd and lover of musicals, I couldn’t stop screaming at the screen because everyone was talking about his gender presentation and no one was mentioning vocal ranges. Chris Colfer has a higher range than I do (I’m a contralto); he would definitely struggle with singing Tony’s part. The question of whether or not gay can play straight (and vice versa) stands on its own, but the fact that Kurt didn’t even try to transpose one of Tony’s songs into a higher key to sing at the audition, and instead sang like a soprano, was confusing to me. Music is a real thing, Glee! It has rules!

  11. I seem to be in the minority here but I really enjoyed this episode. I guess I am used to Glee sucking so hard that any bit of good and I’m like ZOMG THIS IS THE BEST EP EVER. There was a lot I enjoyed in this one though.

    Brittany Pierce is a freaking genius and I love her. And the tiny scene between her & Santana gave me all kinds of warm fuzzy Brittana feelings.

    I loved Quinn in this episode. Dianna Agron does dramatic very well (aside from sometimes looking funny when she cries) and I really felt for Quinn in the scene when Shelby showed her Beth’s picture and she broke down crying. Also also also that last scene when she was all sweetness and light and then BAM – batshit fucking crazy. Brilliant. When she turns to face Puck her expression is like, serial killer. It’s amazing.

    I also enjoy when Idina & Lea sing together. Their voices and their faces are both epic.

    • I’m in the minority with you. The Quinn/Puck/baby/Shelby story I didn’t have a problem with; I think when you give a baby up you just *might* have some unresoved feelings there. I didn’t catch the Shelby adoption mistake but that seems really sloppy. Brittany, I love just about everything about her and I liked most of the songs.

      My biggest beef is with the Kurt story, it just feels like territory already covered before. And for goodness sake, enough of the Barbra songs already! Blaine’s blue polo/skinny green suspenders and pink bow tie were awful, I hope I don’t have to endure this all season.
      I think the only way they can make the “diva-off” pay off is to have Mercedes take it and Rachel realize that she’s not an automatic choice. Which maybe she already did last week…I dunno. Maybe at this point I shouldn’t expect a pay-off from Glee.

      I missed about 15 mins. of the ep ’cause my satellite decided that it was a good time to torture me and crap out. I want to watch the Blaine number at the end, I missed most of it. He needs to start putting his own desires ahead of Kurt’s or there’s going to be trooouuble. With a capitol T that rhymes with P that stands for pool.

      Last thing-are they running for student body president or senior class president? I would check my DVR but I’m running late for a mammogram. That is probs TMI but ladies-get yer boobs checked!

      • Checked the DVR, they are running for senior class president.

        Another thing I noticed, Mr.Motta(?)donated the purple pianos from forclosed homes in the first ep but I didn’t hear it mentioned that he gave money to New Directions. Just for the new club featuring his daughter.

    • I was majorly annoyed with the story, but I really enjoyed the scenes with Quinn. Even though it’s a HORRIBLE THING, I’m quite happy that Quinn’s “I’m going to look normal again and get my baby back” are drenched with very angry, bitter, manipulative tones. Like, she hasn’t suddenly woken up from a bad spell and OH LOOK I’M PERFECT AND POPULAR AGAIN. No. She’s pretty fucked up with no one to support her, so Quinn’s gonna do what Quinn’s gotta do: control everything around with no regard to the consequences.

      I feel like Quinn is honestly one of the few fleshed out characters on the show, and I’m never disappointed with how Dianna acts (because we’re madly in love and going to get married and la-la-la…)

      • This this this. I’m constantly annoyed that Glee wants to take both Quinn and Rachel (my favorite characters who I feel have the most potential/are the most fleshed out) and ignore all the things about them that make them interesting; instead they fall back on Quinn = manipulative bitch just for the hell of it, and Rachel = selfish diva. How many times does Rachel have to apologize to Mercedes, treat her nice, and offer up her solos before everyone will stop complaining about it? How many things does Quinn have to lose in her life before anyone notices that she’s obviously got issues (when she comes back she says, “I’ll pretend I think I’m special, if I have to…” or something like that, which is kind of heartbreaking). Also, they’re both so hot so if they could just be on the show a whole bunch – like, all the time, and Finn never shows up again – I would be a much happier person.

  12. I immediately did the fantasy casting of West Side Story when I watched the ep and I too cast Santana as Bernardo. It just works.

    Quinn really doesn’t understand adoption.

  13. Quinn was giving me Halle Berry in Losing Isaiah.

    At first I was pissed Santana was not in this episode and why she wasn’t auditioning for West Side Story as she is Latina and the musical has nothing to do with New Directions. But then I was happy her 30 seconds were actually quite poignant. And I was also shocked a Santana “Revenge” sub plot was not woven in. Usually when she feels wronged she gives the whole school mono or something. She’s growing!

    So over Kurt. These are the facts. Women who like men tend to like men who have deeper voices and are sensitive but only beneath this exterior of “he’s my rock and I feel safe around him”. Rock Hudson had this quality. He went by Rock. Kurt doesn’t. I don’t find him believable in those roles. I agree with Burt…who is the best father ever. Write your own stories where the male lead is someone like yourself and then in 100 years kids like yourself have lead roles to aspire to. Progress takes initiative!

    Um…over the diva-offs.

  14. More Brittana please. I confess Kurt’s singing voice grates on my nerves but I love Blaine and his bow ties! I’ve never like Quinn she’s self-centered, spoiled and manipulative. She has no business having a baby, giving birth does not automatically make you fit for parenting; which we have the news to remind us of daily.

    Evan if Shelby was a surrogate but she still had to give Rachel up for adoption, it is not unheard of for a surrogate to change her mind.

    I read somewhere we’ll be meeting Rachel’s Dad’s eventually this season but first Mike Chang’s this week.

    And lastly, can we get some Brittana please, Santana was brilliant though being there for a woman and all.

  15. I feel the need to go watch West Side Story now and picture Santana as Tony and Brittany as Maria… Don’t judge.

  16. I have issues with the baby story because I had a baby and I gave up said baby because some people don’t need to be parents and I’m one of those people and Quinn is one of those people and everyone ever is like WHAT I DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY YOU WOULD GIVE UP YOUR BABY BECAUSE BABIES ARE FUCKING MAGICAL AND THEY MAKE YOUR LIFE BETTER IN EVERY WAY OMG BETTER BETTER BABY BAAAAABBBBBBYYYYY and I was thinking that MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYBE there would be a positive portrayal of a person realizing they shouldn’t be a parent and then that being ok but now Quinn wants her baby back? WTF Quinn. WTF Ryan Murphy. /rant

  17. Why do I have such a ridiculous crush on Rachel Berry?

    Why?

    Maybe it’s her voice and her drive. I’ll go with that.

  18. So is Courtney Galiano’s character (one of the skanks) gonna be the “Joan Jett-esque” lesbian they promised us for Santana?

    I’m just guessing, but they gave her a couple short lines and she’s a great dancer. Glee club might need a lesbian Mike Chang?

  19. I take what scraps I can from Glee nowadays, and that panning shot of Idina’s entrance was enough to placate me for the entire episode. #shameless

  20. Maybe I’m projecting because I am a) adopted and b) recently back in contact with my birth family, but I have so many feelings about that storyline and pretty much none of them are good.

    It’s this incoherent, jumbled mess and they seem to be clinging to the “you need your bio-parents in your life or you are all sorts of fucked up” idea, and that is an idea that I really wish didn’t get spread any more. I already have enough people asking what it’s like not to grow up with my “real parents”.

    Someone once actually asked me if it was like on Glee. There was twitching.

    I’m not saying it’s all sunshine and roses all the time. I have a ton of conflicting feelings regarding my adoption, and I know everyone else involved does too. I just wish shows like this would stop perpetuating harmful stereotypes that make adopted kids feel like there’s something wrong.

  21. Ahem. I just watched the promo for Brittany’s musical number next week.
    Jinkies.
    *wipes sweat from brow*

    I’ll be in my bunk.

  22. gosh, rebellish quinn is SO HOT. i can’t believe they already finished that “storyline” of hers. so sad. :(

    I’M NOT READY YET TO MOVE ON FROM THAT HOTNESS THAT WAS PUNK!QUIN

  23. Thing that bothered me about the Sue and Quinn storyline: “Let’s blame Glee for how it ruined your life!” I understand why Sue conveniently forgot about how she was the one who kicked Quinn out of the Cheerios for being pregnant in the first place, but why did Quinn forget that?

  24. I feel like watching this episode just for Santana and Brittany, especially when Santana says Brittany is a unicorn. Otherwise it sounds unbearable. Kurt’s internalized homophobia leading him to talk down to Brittany? Brittany always being branded as a dumb slut? Victimized anarchist Quinn rebelling after being dumped by the horrible “hero” Finn(she’s the villain I see)? C’mon Glee! Despicable sexism is despicable.

    Despite having more women on the team the Glee writers have really let themselves go. This West Side Story line is unnecessary. Bringing Shelby back is unnecessary. Bringing Beth back is bad news and not helpful for Quinn who is suffering being demonized and talked down to by almost everyone (mostly males – Will, Puck, Shelby) in this awful misogynistic show.

    Rant done. I want so much for Brittany (and Santana). If only this story was in better hands
    http://ryureblog.tumblr.com/post/13663455988/dont-underestimate-brittany

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