Pretty Little Liars 206 Recap: Never Letting Go of Lesbian Dreams

Cut to backstage at the fashion show, where the girls are sitting at their private dressing stations pretending to powder their noses when Samara arrives, dressed for The Peach Pit After Dark with some random Lezzy-Looking chick on her arm.

it's feria, crimson glow, thanks for asking

Not only does “Quinn” introduce herself to Emily like they’re old friends from Montessori but she totally holds Samara’s hand like that hand doesn’t belong inside Emily.

Samara: “Looks like a big crowd out there, I may end up sitting on your lap.”
Quinn: “Wouldn’t be the first time, right?”

Um. Ew?

Hanna's facial expression here is priceless

back off, bitch

When Emily asks Aria and Hanna if they thought Samara/Quinn were a bit touchy feely they halfheartedly say no. Where’s Spencer? Spencer’s complete and total distrust of all human beings would help in this moment.

Hanna: “How come I have no date and you have a date that brought a date?”

Fantastic.

the vest, right? like that vest looked pretty gay?

A few scenes later, Samara returns backstage to see her “handiwork” (that’s what she says) and Emily’s a bit standoffish:

Samara: “That is one lucky dress — Emily what’s wrong?”
Emily: “You and Quinn are just friends, right?”
Samara: “Since the second grade. We used to play dress-up. I was mrs and she was always mister. Would it bother you if I were seeing someone? Not that I am, but if I were –”
Emily: “I was just starting to feel like we may have something.”
Samara: “Me too. But we’ve only been out a few times and you didn’t want to get too serious too fast.”
Emily: “Right, I did say that.” [awkward pause] “I’m gonna go get ready.”
Samara: “See you out there.”

once we got to high school we switched from dress-up to undressing

Oh ew, I hate it when that happens. You know when you say you want to ‘take it slow’ ’cause you basically want to be able to say all of your feelings all the time without it having to “mean” anything and you mostly say it out of self-protection but then she actually takes it, runs with it, and brings another girl home with it? And then you’re trapped: either fess up that you’ve fallen for a stranger essentially by default or go with the flow of the river you voluntarily dived into.

but we've spoken at least 15 words to each other, doesn't that mean it's time to move in

But also? Samara stalked Emily for weeks and made at least two references to visiting her in college in 2013, so you can’t blame Emily for getting the wrong idea.

But Christ how many hot femme lesbians live in the Rosewood area for Samara to “see”?

don't let this rack get away, samara, or you'll regret it every day for the rest of your life

One of the most consistently striking things about these four girls (although Aria slightly less so, at times) is their Tyra Banks-esque ability to model through it. Maybe I’m insane and like, a depressive or something, but every time I worry Emily’s gonna break into a thousand pieces and drown/sob like I may have done at her age, girlfriend smiles with her eyes and models straight on through it.

On to The Fashion Show! The Fashion Show is 45 kinds of amazing and I’m not just saying that because of A’s multi-platform IMAX doomsday spectacular at the end. These outfits are either Halloween Costumes or High Fashion and it really doesn’t matter which. Lizz will figure that out for you.

We’ve got some Pan Am/Boogie Nights/post-hippie/bourgeois-beachwear shit going on and Emily’s dress is totally Quick Release, which is sexy.

I am a star. I'm a star, I'm a star, I'm a star. I am a big, bright, shining star. That's right.

This TV program may be called “Pretty Little Liars” but rarely is this prettiness actually mentioned or addressed. The Fashion Show is the first time in a long time where you can see that these girls are hot and they know it.

so excited for that consciousness-raising group at 6

“Quinn” has seemingly vanished, maybe to dye her hair back to its natural color and return her vest to 2007, so Samara’s cozying up with Mrs.Fields. You can’t sit next to Mrs. Fields and see other people, that’s against the rules.

yeah, i'd fingerbang that

Everyone wins the Top Model Challenge! The prize is an unexpected spy-cam-style photo session with renowned fashion photographer A.

desperately seeking susan/A

And listen. I’m no FashionCapper, but I know a tribute when I see one and this outfit is a straight-up callback to like, all of your favorite things, from the fingerless gloves to the sparkly headband. I had my Intern Grace create this breakdown for you and I think you’ll agree that it’s perfect:

During Allison’s end-of-show tribute The Liars are looking super foxy and everyone’s entertained. BUT NOT FOR LONG.

i got razors up in my hair, all up in there

Suddenly everything gets all Red Light District Death Metal — someone hijacked that tribute video and turned it into a House of Horror. It’s the freakiest and most awesome thing to ever happen to these people and for once The Liars aren’t blamed for it.

Did anyone else see this…

And think about this?

It gets worse:

One last message for the girls after the room has cleared out:

A gets a bit Sadaam Husseiny with the votive candles ’cause she needs her name on absolutely everything to remind the civilians of her sovereign right to absolute power.

never forget

Obviously we silently prayed that Jenna would be in the fashion show with a gem-encrusted cane and Nicole Richie sunglasses but no such luck.

dotted-divider2

Back at the Fields Home, Emily asks her Mom, “When you and dad were dating did you see other people?”

perfect posture runs in the family

Mom, who’s been consistently interested in the potential drawbacks of Emily’s various smokin’ hot paramours and second-guessed the reasoning behind all of Emily’s questions since the show began, just answers the question:

Pam: “Well, we had that conversation very early on. But I made it clear that if it was gonna be me, it could only be me.”

Good news — Mrs. Fields tells Emily that Ashley Marin, having done such a fabulous job of keeping a roof over Hanna’s head and hiding money in lasagna boxes, has volunteered to house Emily if Pam wants to make it to Texas in time for SXSW.

And really, how many sleepovers can Hanna and Emily have before love begins to blossom, you know? Or maybe I just think that because I’m gay, like Emily, and maybe also like you, or someone you know. Is someone you know gay? Is it A.? Whatever you say, it’s okay.

Half of these images come from the fantastically thorough Pretty Little Liars Fansite.

Pages: 1 2See entire article on one page

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Riese

Riese is the 41-year-old Co-Founder of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, video-maker, LGBTQ+ Marketing consultant and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and now lives in Los Angeles. Her work has appeared in nine books, magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. She's Jewish and has a cute dog named Carol. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 3186 articles for us.

34 Comments

  1. This was epic – I LOLed at work at all your captions and rollovers.

    Save all the comments I’ll make on all the crazy fashion, I have to say Hannah’s turning into my favourite. Her deadpanned cynicism is very awesome to see on a teen-show because most teen-characters have the personality of pudding. Or Samara, which is only minorily up the evolutionary chain.

  2. Hanna is so completely my favorite. (Sorry, Ems.) Her deadpan comedy is spot on and she is a BAMF.

    Speaking of ass… can we take a moment to appreciate Shay Mitchell’s curves? Damn girl.

  3. I think Paige got shipwrecked on that lost lesbian island along with Papi, Carmen, Max’s soul patch, and Sounder II.

  4. Love the recap. Actually read this before seeing the show tonight, I can’t stop laughing :)

  5. I agree with everyone that Hannah has been the MVP of the past few episodes, especially when she had that insane moment at the therapist a few episodes ago, A+. That being said, come on guys, Spencer is the obvious winner here. And she’s probably the only one that wouldn’t make me want to claw my eyes out in real life.

    I was into the Emily thing for the sheer novelty of it at first but she’s just so dull.

    • Spencer is definitely a close second for me, but this whole Toby-obsession thing is kind of a turnoff. And don’t get me started on Aria…that girl’s like 8 kinds of crazy. I think 6 of those crazies involve her wardrobe.

      • LOL re: Aria & her crazy wardrobe. I can’t get behind Aria b/c of Ezra. It probably means I’m officially too old to be watching this show but the whole thing just squicks me out. And now she’s kinda flirting with Jason. Ew. Girl needs help in the choosing a suitable boyfriend dept.

  6. So funny that you put
    “i hope i’m right about emily being a bottom”
    as the caption for that photo of Samara because during this scene I suddenly thought – Emily and Samara are both bottoms. Then I thought Maya, Paige and Allison were tops. Emily needs to dump Samara and find one of her lost exs. The end.

      • yeah i definitely feel like paige, maya and samara are all tops and emily is definitely a bottom. i don’t know precisely why i think that

        • Didn’t she admit to Paige that she liked bossy girls? Ali was also a bossy-girl (understatement) and Emily liked that dominande.

    • Samara bossing Em around? Talking about visiting Em in college and pushing her towards it? I think she calls Top for this pairing.

      • I’m not liking the pushy aspect of Samara, she’s decided almost everything about this relationship. She told Emily she shouldn’t trust her so much. Quinn said she was a perfectionist and wouldn’t give up until things were right. And she’s always smiling.

        I smell controlling stalker girlfriend.

  7. “Oh ew, I hate it when that happens. You know when you say you want to ‘take it slow’ ’cause you basically want to be able to say all of your feelings all the time without it having to “mean” anything and you mostly say it out of self-protection but then she actually takes it, runs with it, and brings another girl home with it? And then you’re trapped: either fess up that you’ve fallen for a stranger essentially by default or go with the flow of the river you voluntarily dived into.”

    happens to me all the timeeeeee.

    at least i fixed it this time :)

  8. I hate to bring it up, but where is the screenshot of Shay Mitchell’s callipygian asset? ‘Cause….wow. A friend used the word agog to describe me watching that scene.

    I think Emily seems bland sometimes because she’s always been trying to be the nice girl, the “good girl”. Another recap mentioned that it’s always the quiet ones that got game.

    IIRC, the parents and the therapist gave up on the idea of separating the PLLs, decided it would be better for them to be together and support one another.

    I have grown to love Hannah. At first, I got her confused with Allison. Then I sympathised with her about “hefty Hannah” and the cupcake cruelty, also with being forced to send that invite to Aria’s mom. Now I love her humor and her snark and I appreciate how very pretty she is.

    Emily living with Hannah FTW!

  9. I am losing hope that Paige will ever come back. And I remain unimpressed with Samara, esp after this Quinn fiasco.

  10. “don’t let this rack get away, samara, or you’ll regret it every day for the rest of your life”

    LOL.

  11. Who is the actress that plays Quinn? I only ask because I think I’ve seen her in something else.

    Okay, I lied. She’s super hot and I want to add her to my celebrity crush list.

    • That’s Courtney Davies from Cycle 13 of America’s Next Top Model. She’s in a few commercials too.

  12. amazing.

    did anyone else watch this in real time (should I be embarrassed? maybe.) and think they saw Emily’s mom on a Jenny Craig commercial? Anyone? No? Just me? Ok then.

  13. Maybe I should start actually watching the show. However, it is difficult to want to when you recap so amazingly! Although it would be a good distraction from uni, hmmmmm.

  14. Jesus christ on a cracker, that was hyserical! Here’s hoping the CFO didn’t hear me falling over in laughter from across the hall. This is a fun-free zone.

  15. re-reading after watching the ep.
    haha, loved it round 2

    Where do all the lesbians in this show go when their plot lines are up? actually where do any of the female characters go? (glasses girl etc.)

    Are they all on an island somewhere?

  16. ‘Sadaam Husseiny’ … LOL I almost chocked on my ‘Buttermilch’, luckily didn’t make much mess, buuut did earn several worried glances from my colleagues, obvious sign that I should get back to programming :D and no more recaps during lunch breaks >:D

  17. TEST POST

    sorry to resurrect this post, but i just want to try something

    if the above is in reddish print, i win the internet.

    • damnit

      how about now?

      if that^ didn’t work i’m going to bed for real this time

Comments are closed.