The Autostraddle 100% Natural Feel-Good Good Advice Generator

Hello, you sweet lambs! Good day, you powerful musk oxen! Did you know today is our sixth birthday? It is, yes it is! And for our birthday, we are hosting an all-day Advice-a-Thon/AMA with our staff and a whole bunch of special guests. If you’re an A+ member, hop on over and ask us anything! If you’re not an A+ member, we hope you’ll think about joining up today. Not only do you get some pretty rad perks — including exclusive content, newsletters, a podcast, discounted merch, and more — when you join A+; you also get the satisfaction of knowing you’re keeping the most popular independently-owned queer women’s website in the world up and running!

But hey, you know what? We understand A+ is not for everyone, and that’s okay! We love you very much! And we don’t want to leave you out of the advice loop. So below, you will find one of our greatest creations: The Autostraddle 100% Natural Feel-Good Good Advice Generator. Answer four simple questions and our generator will look into your soul to determine what kind of advice you need today, and choose the famous queer woman to speak that advice right into your brain and your heart.

Go ahead, give it a try.

Thank you for celebrating our birthday with us. We could not do this thing without your constant love and continued support.

Before you go! Autostraddle runs on the reader support of our AF+ Members. If this article meant something to you today — if it informed you or made you smile or feel seen, will you consider joining AF and supporting the people who make this queer media site possible?

Join AF+!

Heather Hogan

Heather Hogan is an Autostraddle senior editor who lives in New York City with her wife, Stacy, and their cackle of rescued pets. She's a member of the Television Critics Association, GALECA: The Society of LGBTQ Entertainment Critics, and a Rotten Tomatoes Tomatometer critic. You can also find her on Twitter and Instagram.

Heather has written 1718 articles for us.


  1. Holy moly this actually was the perfect advice for me today!

    It’s like you’re in my brain!

  2. Ohhh thank you. This sickling needed some good advice from Brittney this fine morning.



  4. That Hannah Hart quote was the perfect advice for pretty much every situation I am involved in

  5. This is so cool. Also, happy birthday Autostraddle! 6 years of getting continually greater is really impressive. This site has made a huge difference in my life – thank you!!

  6. Can we make “revenge is a dish best served by dinosaurs with lasers” a mainstream aphorism? I think it needs to be a thing.

    Also, apparently I need to make sure I have cheese in my house. I think Autostraddle understands me on a pretty deep level.

  7. Hannah Hart told me to always have cheese in my house, and I have like 6 different types of cheese currently in my fridge, so I guess I’m doing ok!

  8. WHOA. Normally I find these things kind of silly, but I was hating myself and my doctors and life in general because I’ve been bedridden from a chronic illness flare-up for the last two weeks, and I’d much rather be out getting stuff done and improving the world with the power of science. And I thought since it’s Autostraddle and I need some good advice anyway, I’d give it a shot.

    My quote: “Just because you have asthma doesn’t mean you don’t like to get on top every once in a while.” -Sara Quin

    There’s no way they got that from four questions. This has to be Legilimency. Yer a wizard, Heather!

  9. This actually gave me a Laverne Cox quote that was so perfect for today that I feel I should stitch it on a pillow or something

  10. I am struggling to study for my test on Monday and dealing with new glasses that are causing me pain… This Angela Davis quote is perfect! Just what I needed.

    Thanks Heather!!

    Also Happy Birthday Autostraddle!!! You have changed my life distinctly for the better.

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