Well, this year has been an absolute shit show, so we want to tell you something good! The Autostraddle team racked our brains and came up with our personal 2020 highlights. This year, even the smallest wins count.
Did you take some major steps in your personal growth this year? Did you learn how to knit or get a puppy or finally sign up for online therapy? Drop your 2020 highlights in the comments! We’d love to hear ‘em.
Comments
Everyone’s stuff is a lot and I am so happy for your good things. Heather, you made me cry.
These are all so wonderful, and I’m some glad you have all managed to find some bright spots in the non-stop darkness of this year. For me, the highlights have been:
– getting a new tattoo
– getting a new kitten
– home improvement projects that made my home feel more permanent
– my girlfriend finally and officially moving in
I’m also proud of some things I’ve done this year. I didn’t learn a new instrument or start some intense workout regimen or bake a single thing. But I did save a LOT of money, and gave a LOT of that back to my community by way of donations to charities, mutual aid funds and community organizations. I wrote a LOT of emails to my elected representatives, advocating for things I cared about that would help my communities. And I had a LOT of hard conversations with my family about systemic racism and police brutality and defunding the police.
I’m so glad that Autostraddle is still here, and we all still have this online community when our physical ones are less accessible.
Honestly my most creative accomplishment this year was recreating the entire movie Labyrinth from start to finish on an Animal Crossing island, and I feel like I should feel bad about that being my peak for the year, but I don’t, so there. I was totally unable to focus on almost any of my other usual pursuits, and this children’s game saved my mental health.
Also we bought a house, which I never thought I would be able to do, and I know a lot of other people are unable to do. I’m very grateful for it. Even with the mortgage payments I’ve been able to come up with a budget that still allows me to donate to individuals in need and/or orgs that support them, and have committed to doing as much of that as I can afford on an ongoing basis.
Oh my ghod I want to see your island, do you have a dream address?
Drew, I struggle more with friendships than any other kind of relationships, and I would love to learn more about what it has looked like for you to build those relationships with intention into ones that bring you nourishment and that you can rely on!
I think a big part of it was learning to trust that I deserved it and would find it. If you’re spending all your time with people who treat you poorly you’re not leaving the space for people who will give you the love you deserve. I’m still figuring some of this out, but that’s what I have at the moment. <3
My big accomplishment this year was getting into grad school, then finishing my first semester of my program with decent grades.
Two years ago I could barely even voice out loud that I wanted to switch careers from what I’d spent almost a decade working towards to librarianship, but here I am, now only a year and a half away from my MLIS.
I just finished my first semester of library school too! GO US!
Awesome ! Congrats to both of you and welcome !
Kept a basil plant and a mint plant alive. There’s enough mint for a cocktail this evening if I so chose.
Got confident enough with one embroidery stitch to make a gift with it, and taught myself a whole new one.
Mentioned it last week but bares repeating I finally understand invisible aka ladder stitch.
Oh when there were supply issues therefore all the chicken I had was boneless skinless thighs I marinated and cooked some of them to the point they shredded like breasts. More importantly I wrote down exactly how I did it.
Yesterday I was brave enough to make a full batch of pinto beans from the recipe I’d only nervously been doing half batches of. Had some for lunch with leftover Monday rice. It was good.
Finally have a battle plan for organizing my jewelry smithing stuff beyond keeping pilers kit in easy reach and breakables/sharp stuff wrapped and outta reach.
Might start making stuff again who knows.
Finally my 2nd dog bless her thick skull and small sweet lil brain managed to catch a treat. I was as surprised as I was proud. Might have teared up a bit.
Sally, I am so sorry your mother died. Sending best wishes for the next year to all, I can’t wait for all your books (especially Riese)
This space and all of you are my 2020 lifeline
I spent 2 months whilst the store I manage was physically closed updating our online site (and a bunch of other stuff) and turned it from an average of around $500 a year online sales to $50K this year.
All staff were able to come back to work (and have money during their hiatus), and I felt really good about that. I’ve been obsessive about maintaining a safe environment via hygiene and distancing at work too and so far everyone has stayed healthy, and I’m feeling super grateful for that.
Never thought work would be first thing to mind in good things for a year, but here I am!
So glad to read other online shops besides Amazon got to increase their sales. Congrats on your work and on keeping everyone healthy!
In a strange way, the pandemic kicked me right in the complacency. I got on HRT shortly after lockdown started, I started doing a lot more individual and group therapy, and I started making art for the first time in my life. I sat the other night and wrote down everything good about this year for me, and there was an amazing amount of things to write down.
I bought a huge box of avocados for $5. There were about 40 avocados in there, all at the peak of ripeness. It was the last day of the market before a long weekend and the grocer just wanted rid of them. I made a literal bucket of guacamole and another bucket of chocolate mousse. That was probably the best part of 2020.
Australia doubled the dole for a few months so that was really nice.
The illegal thrill of walking to my girlfriend’s house 5.05km away was pretty intoxicating.
I quit twitter and climate activism and started reading and started listening to more hopeful leftist utopian media instead.
I got my IUD out, which was a great decision, and came out as nonbinary to some people, which is a decision I’m still unsure about.
You are an amazing group of people, thank you for sharing these wins — and for making this site work in all the ways it does.
I started out 2020 about to be a single mother and worrying about how I’d juggle a suddenly halved household income while keeping things as normal as possible for my kids, who were already going to have the upheaval of a parent moving out in February.
Well, “normal” went out the window in March, but we made it work. I’m darn proud of us for managing virtual school, remote work, and a new living situation. That is a win.
My state’s guidelines around divorce mean we can’t even file for two more months — but I’m trying to think of most of 2020 not as a purgatory of waiting for that time to pass, but as a cocoon (thank you, Riese) that I’m using to heal from a relationship that, in retrospect, was bad for a very long time. I’ve journaled, read, and reflected a lot about assumptions I’d been making — including about myself. I’ve been relishing the freedom of being the only adult in the house, and not feeling the need to twist myself into some shape to please anyone else. And feeling like I don’t have to be miserable to make other people happy is a definite win.
I operated a sewing machine for the first time in 25 years and learned to make masks, and learned more about plumbing (on the fly!) than I really wanted to know. I made a lot of banana bread and spent a lot of time putting together furniture, but those were wins, too. It’s all a work in progress, and that’s a good thing.
Here’s to a 2021 with as many wins for each of us, and less stress along the way.
Thank you for all of this. I am the healthiest I have been in years. It’s due to wearing a mask all the time & 2 months of just daily touring of the city. Can’t think of much else.
The one big good thing that happened this year was I completed the first draft of my first book.
My two most major achievements of 2020 are managing to get myself out of the city and back to a small town, and dropping to only part-time study to limit the amount of workload/stress I have to deal with. These are major because I’ve been aware for years that I realistically needed to do this for the sake of my mental health, but now it’s actually happened. Hopefully having made these changes and had everything more or less work out fine will be a good learning experience to help me manage to make similar decisions in the future.
In other news, in the last few months I’ve written about 10,000 words of a book that I’ve been planning/imagining for about for maybe 8 years or so without being able to start. It’s happening!
Wow you guys are all so amazing.
I don’t have a ton of achievements for 2020, but I do have things I’m grateful for. I got to spend a ton of time with my family and I finally met my nephew which has been amazing.
I haven’t been able to see my wife since March, and while that’s sucked, even though it’s cheesy I’ve always been a big believer in the idea that any really long term relationship is actually a bunch of different relationships. And I feel like this year has really helped us to move forward to a new place in our relationship, and I’m really excited for when we can be together again.
Oh and I have one achievement for 2020. Me and my mum and my brothers have all managed to live together, as adults, in a harmonious, pleasant, not all killing eachother kind of way! Quite proud of that one.
My partner and I bought a place and moved in together in February (thank goodness), I read my first N. K. Jemison book, we got a nine year old pit “puppy”, and I learned that my whole household does pretty well trapped at home. The teens even do better with remote schooling 🤷🏻♂️.
Also, not sure if it counts as 2020 or 2021, but I got engayged!!! Never thought I’d want to get married again, but I proposed and she said yes.
I graduated grad school! Maybe I can’t find a job in my field but I did it!! I got that degree!
Also got started on new meds for my chronic illness and they might destroy my immune system which is not all that great in a pandemic…but they let me work and hike and tie my shoes and be a human out in the world and it’s magical
Also I moved back in with my mom and brother which in other worlds might be not great but it meant company during lockdown and lots of time with my mama and someone to cook with and talk to and share meals with and Im very grateful
-i applied to grad school again!
-started therapy (shoutout to mary the real mvp of 2020)
-moved in with friends and got way less crushingly isolated
-read over two hundred books, at least half of which were queer in some way
-baked a lot
-learned to draw, sort of (which somehow was only this year?)
Since it is now January 1st, it is exactly one year since I moved to a different country just because I felt like it! It’s been very hard, COVID meant I had a very scary unstable income situation and dealing with German bureaucracy as an immigrant with ADHD is the pits. But while here I have started therapy, learned so much about what I want to do with my life, and somehow because of travel ban exemptions for couples my girlfriend and I are now living together after two years of long distance. It’s been one of the most confronting things I’ve ever done (turns out mental illness is quite hard to ignore when you are locked down with your partner 24/7) but it’s been so incredibly lovely to be together, and I am so in love, and I feel so affirmed in our relationship! I also finally became an A+ member after reading Autostraddle for over ten years!!!! I wish you all lots of good fortune and strength and growth in 2021.
I got nearly straight A’s my first semester of my masters program, even through navigating the fuckery that is online school
I am so grateful to all of you for sharing these glimpses into your lives. The vulnerability and perseverance. Malic what a great idea.
-Autostraddle has been an AMAZING place this year. The comfort, the laughs, the empowerment, the truth reckoning, the activism. Just Wow.
-I turned 60 this year ! This just tickles my fancy.
-I moved into my own place ! (gay divorcée). I give thanks for this several times a day.
-I made new friends ! New Gay Women Friends !! I did this as an adult. So hot.
-I have a job and I discovered that I really, really, like working from home. Like really.
-I discovered that it’s hard to consistently practice meditation every day but the mental and physical health benefits are astounding. I never would’ve discovered this if I hadn’t been pushed up against the wall by COVID and forced to rely on myself as my primary caregiver.
Actually, that may be the biggest victory ever, that I can rely on myself to take care of me when shit gets real.
And I reiterate my gratitude, without all of you this year would have been bleak.
Turns out long distance relationships are excellent training for pandemic long distance.
My A-Camp room-mate to partner became my fiancée and although we’ve had to postpone the wedding, I never imagined this life and how wonderful it could be.
I also finally said fuck it to not being myself.
Lego released the Pirates of Barracuda Bay: Ideas and my inner child rejoiced. I desperately wanted a Lego pirate ship as a child and my family couldn’t afford it. My fiancée and I have been building it together (long distance) this year. They have the instructions, I’ve the pieces. We’re on step 300 something and roughly 30 hours in. It’s taught us communication, persistence and developed a delightful vocabulary of lesbian names for pieces. Lego Masters: Queer Edition – we’re ready!
i love when a-camp housing love stories!!!!! thank you because this now counts as something good for my year also