NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday Is Going Outside

Feature image of topshelf87 via rodeoh. All of the photographs in this NSFW Sunday are from rodeoh. The inclusion of a visual here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If you’re a photographer or model and think your work would be a good fit for NSFW Sunday, please email carolyn at autostraddle dot com.

Welcome to NSFW Sunday!

aluhoo via rodeoh

Here’s some further essential reading on what FOSTA-SESTA means for sex workers.

“A neural network has been trained to produce its own take on classical paintings” and they’re erotic and not creepy at all.

Get a prenup. Long-term legal and financial planning is hot.

foundinsound via rodeoh

Sex outside can be more freeing than sex in places you’re supposed to have sex, writes Sarah Field at Broadly:

“For me, outdoor sex is all about the spontaneity. I get off on it. When you’re having sex in a regular bedroom setting, sex feels so premeditated and formulaic. Whereas when I’m outdoors, I care less about what I look like. I don’t have so many body hang-ups, and I lose my inhibitions much more. I feel freer and less constrained by ideas of what I should look like or whether I’ve waxed, or anything like that. Even if I don’t always come or have the best technical sex outside, these moments count as the highlights of my sexual experiences because I really feel like I’ve had fun and let go.”

Aimee via rodeoh

Why not make your own weed lube?

Not sure where to start with BDSM? Try talking about it, talking dirty about it, and then adding a blindfold, handcuffs, wax play or more.

One metaphor for thinking about how to structure your poly life (or, tbh, any part of any life where you’re managing multiple commitments and types of relationships) is like you’re managing intuitive eating.

At Oh Joy Sex Toy, Cici Luna discussed being asexual at a play party, including finding space to engage without having sex and with a low pain tolerance.

It’s hard to leave abusive relationships.

itsanikagray via rodeoh

Breakups suck even more when you live together. Make the decision without thinking about the logistics, prepare to sleep somewhere else for a little while, and remember that the breakup conversation won’t be the last conversation you have:

“The two of you are going to have a whole lot of logistics to sort through post-breakup, and it’s not going to be fun if the sight of them makes you want to hack your way through a rage room. Etzion emphasizes that maintaining civility is usually possible, even if things towards the end of the relationship were really awful. ‘You know that you’ve ended something that is no longer working for you—staying away from that toxicity itself can be empowering,’ she says.

It’s helpful to recognize that the breakup conversation isn’t the last conversation you’ll ever have—but things will obviously be different afterward. ‘It doesn’t mean the relationship is over, but the form of the relationship is definitely over, and it’s important to not resist that,’ Etzion says. ‘[You’re] reversing any dependency on the partner, coming back to autonomy and independence.'”

lalaine_adanna via rodeoh


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Carolyn Yates is the NSFW Consultant, and was formerly the NSFW Editor (2013–2018) and Literary Editor, for Autostraddle.com. Her writing has appeared in Nylon, Refinery29, The Toast, Bitch, Xtra!, Jezebel, and elsewhere. She recently moved to Los Angeles from Montreal. Find her on twitter.

Carolyn has written 871 articles for us.

9 Comments

        • Sure, but how do you create a prenup for hypotheticals? “If some day my income is 6x yours and we get a divorce, you’re only entitled to x amount in alimony unless I felt like you were pulling your weight with chores, thereby contributing to my career success, in which case you are entitled to y amount”? Genuinely asking what that would look like. If other circumstances come up, like one person starts their own business and wants to keep it theirs, couldn’t the necessary paperwork be drawn up when the business is started?

          • Part of the prenup process is disclosing all your assets and debts to each other, so it can be valuable to start to make sure there actually aren’t any significant assets or debts, you know? It’s also theoretically a good way to talk about long-term legal and financial planning, what your values are in that regard, and how you would handle it if one or both of you were to get into greater income or greater debt (even though postnups are also a thing, and prenups can be amended, etc.).

  1. The Abusive relationships article hits me hard because I just cut off contact with my abusive dad and my best friend is currently stuck with an abusive wife. I can’t stand when people who’ve never dealt with an abusive relationship say things like “Why didn’t you just ___.” They don’t understand that it’s not that easy, especially when your abuser acts so nice in public and everyone tells you how lucky you are to have them. And to ad insult to injury, I’ve even had people shame me and my friend for showing PTSD symptoms.

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