Hey champs, this week we’re here to talk about Awards Season! That beautiful time of year when beautiful people put on beautiful outfits and sit around in a beautiful Hollywood theatre to win awards for some usually mediocre movies and TV shows!
My colleague Alyssa noticed that the letters behind Stephanie appear to (but like, obvs do not) spell out DENBO, which reminded us of our favorite(???????) character from The L Word, She-bar entrepreneur Dawn Denbo.
As an homage to our friend Ms. Denbo, as a tribute to how beautiful Stephanie Beatriz looks in that picture, and mostly for no real reason whatsoever, we are dedicating this post to our own unofficial awards ceremony. Dear readers, thank you for attending the inaugural Denbo Awards.
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“My first love growing up was the movies. I would see six to eight movies every week with my grandmother, who raised me. And later, when I was a teenager, we got our first television set, and then I got a new love. But what fascinated me was how the stars on the screen could make people laugh, or cry, or maybe both.” — Carol Burnett Carol Burnett accepting the first ever Carol Burnett Award at last nights Golden Globes was my favorite moment of all. I used to use VHS tapes to record her show, and I would laugh until I cried watching her. She’s one of my heroes, and it felt so special to witness everyone celebrating her work in such an incredible way. I was straight up sobbing at the end of her speech. The Carol Burnett Award is the new television equivalent of film’s Cecil B. DeMille Award. Also I wore this fly ass dress to some after parties. Styling: @arieltunnell Hair: @fallonchavezhair Makeup: @ktmell Dress: @hamelbymelinaharris Shoes: @stuartweitzman Clutch: @tylerellisofficial Earrings: @marco_bicego
I would be remiss if I did not present the first Denbo Award for GODDAMN to Stephanie Beatriz.
The Proving My Relationship Exists By Touching Cara Delevingne’s Butt Award goes to Ashley Benson this week, but I can’t promise anything in the future.
The Lover Cindi Award goes to… Hayley Kiyoko!!!!!
The Be Still My Heart Everything Looks Like That One Shot from Jaws Award goes to Lena Waithe.
The Aspiring Grunge Mommi in Television or Film Award goes to Evan Rachel Wood.
Rutina Wesley sailed away with the Most Charming Smile Despite A Usually Very Unflattering Angle Award.
The Damn I Need a Checkup Award is hereby presented to King Princess, for this week’s very gay photo.
The Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya Honorary Thirst Trap Award goes to Teddy Geiger.
I’m awarding Janelle Monaé the Denbo Award for Overall Best.
The Denbo Award for Excellence in Maintaining Friendships and Creative Partnerships With Your Ex Girlfriend goes to St Vincent and Carrie Brownstein. Um, if I ever tried to exert any kind of creative control over my ex girlfriend’s art she would eat my face. Good for you two!!!
That picture of Teddy Geiger made me say Holy Shit out loud. Thank you for including her and blessing me with all this hotness before work.
I’d like to add a comment but I seem to have lost the power of speech.
Your Geiger counter is clicking like mad?
All very well-deserved! Can we also give ERWB the Erin Sullivan What I Wore Photography Award? Because she looks pretty darn similar to this article’s feature image: https://www.autostraddle.com/what-i-wore-navigating-the-heteronormative-patriarchy-pt-7-354811/
I’m sorry but those letters clearly spell out DENBEDS, which sounds like what you’d find in a secret back room at She-bar
Do you only gain access with the right dentourage?
Stef you are the awards presenter we deserve.
My sexuality is apparently still costume, bc bi-multaneous thought on seeing that Stephanie Beatriz pic is…ooh how would I recreate that dress, what’s the cut of it?
HOT TAKE: WHAT IF STEPHANIE BEATRIZ IS STEF’S SECRET IDENTITY?
Yeah Stef that whole “use ‘f’ instead of ‘ph’ and they’ll never figure it out” thing is kinda like Clark Kent and his glasses. Requires a willing suspension of disbelief not to see the truth. And today we’re not wearing suspenders. (Apparently disbelief = pants?)
So belief is… bare butts? I can get behind that
Bringing up the rearguard then, @Chandra?
And @iarrannme you read my mind and gave that comment legs.
Bare butts bare our souls.
Yessss the pun crack team is all here 😀
Rest assured we’ll always be round
Always ready with assinine puns.
“We have the best puns,” she gluted cheekily.
Can we sneak into this week’s comment awards through the rear entrance? I don’t want to imply we’d feel butt-hurt if @queergirl gave all the awards to current TV commentary on the Derry airing instead….
@snaelle …but we would feel left behind.
I don’t think that we’ll get an award. We’ll probably have to bum one off of someone else.
It’s been great thinking of all these puns, but now back twerk.
But shouldn’t Stephanie Beatriz be awarded the “Milkshake Award”?
LOVER CINDI AWARD
Raise your hand if you read “Guess who won the thirst trap award” and thought “if it isn’t Teddy Geiger I will eat my own hair”
1. I’ve been on a mini-emotional-rollercoaster for the past few minutes, trying to determine how I feel about our community’s endless ability to reference L Word no matter how much time passes. My final emotion was: thrilled.
2. If Carol Burnett got the inaugural Carol Burnett award, doesn’t that mean that Dawn Denbo should have got an inaugural Dawn Denbo award?
3. This should be the theme tune for the ceremony:
4. As valentine’s season approaches, it would be remiss of me not to mention (and not at all a shameless plug) that if you have the good fortune of having a Lover Cindy, then you should probably get this card from my wife’s Etsy:
sally this is the gayest shit and i am HERE for it
Nice plug with the sponsored post
After telling my gf about St. Vincent/Sleater-Kinney, I learned that she has never seen SK live before, so double yay! Hoping for a tour later this year as well. Can’t wait.
Also, anyone else shocked/taken aback when hearing Stephanie Beatriz’s actual speaking voice?! I was expecting Rosa. lol
OMG I got so caught up in my excitement over a new album it didn’t even occur to me that there will have to be A TOUR!!!
This news is the gift that keeps on giving
I know what you mean. I just hope its a tour and not a few festivals over the Spring/Summer/Early fall period as I rather not deal with other bands and their straight fans.