Anonymous Sex Toy Review: TuLips

Over the last few years, sex toy companies and stores have asked us to review their toys in exchange for, you know, their toys. Today we’re reviewing the TuLips!

  • Material: Silicone
  • Color: Pink, Coral, Mint, Raspberry
  • Power Source: Rechargeable / USB
  • Length: 4.5 inches
  • Width: 2 inches

I love my clit, and I love that we as a society are recently Very On Board with the reality that a lot of the clit is internal, and I love external vibrators that focus on The Whole Clit. So the TuLips seemed really really relevant to my interests. It is advertised as such:

A silky soft vibrator uniquely designed to stimulate the entire clitoris, not just the tip! Its ergonomic, revolutionary design and ten powerful but quiet settings will pleasure you like nothing else. TuLips makes the hitting the g-spot yesterday’s news.

It also comes in a bright joyous neon pink color (as well as three other equally delightful colors, I just personally adore pink and try to make sure all my sex toys are pink), is made of a smooth luscious silicone, and is rechargeable. Sounds perfect, right?

Though TuLips comes in a neat package and does indeed sound perfect on paper (at least for folks who like external vibrations on their clits), the reality is just… fine. I wanted to love it so much that I actually kept putting off writing this review, hoping that if I just masturbated with it one more time it would magically not only meet my needs (which it does) but totally blow my mind. But that day never came, and though I did, reliably, with this cute punnily named toy, it’s time to be honest: this vibrator is Fine.

This toy reminds me of a lot of other small, handheld, pink, clit-focused vibrators. It’s meant to intuitively nestle between your labia lips and stimulate the entire clit, both inside and outside, but I could never get the positioning quite right and it didn’t feel intuitive at all (although of course everyone’s vulva is different and maybe it would work differently for someone else’s). If anything it seemed a bit overly complicated and I had to go online and read and re-read the instructions about which way to hold the device. The different speeds and settings of the vibe are totally fine. It’s a little buzzy for my tastes, but with lube and concentration it did produce a reliable orgasm. I think due to its size and shape it could have been fun to wear with a harness while fucking someone or while jacking off, though I didn’t test that specific idea. The vibe is not particularly loud but also isn’t super quiet, and is waterproof. It does have a lifetime warrantee, as do all the other toys from Sweet Vibrations. That’s nice!

This toy is a reasonably priced, absolutely fine version of a clit vibrator. I think if you’re looking for clit stimulation and you’re on a budget, like puns, or simply enjoy collecting sex toys, the TuLips is a good buy.

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