NSFW Sunday Is All Possibility

Feature image of Valentine and Calico in Crash Pad Series episode 232. All of the photographs in this NSFW Sunday come from the CrashPadSeries.com. The inclusion of a photograph here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If you’re a photographer or model and think your work would be a good fit for NSFW Sunday, please email carolyn at autostraddle dot com.

Welcome to NSFW Sunday! I know some of you still miss the tumblr visuals, thanks for hanging out as we figure this out.

Odile and Daisy Ducati in Crash Pad episode 160

+ Science and sex education often overlook the clitoris, whether by not explaining what it is, giving misinformation about it, or simply ignoring it. And most science still doesn’t even “get” the shape of the clitoris – but a new 3D teaching model could change that:

“Fillod says she hopes the model will help spread better knowledge of women’s genital anatomy. It might be used for sex ed in schools, for one. But everyone else who might encounter a clitoris has something to learn from the model, too. Chalmers explains that understanding this ‘neat little organ’ is important because medical professionals are now beginning to appreciate that it has a role in immune health. Being able to identify and understand the clitoris means knowing when something is wrong — both for women and for their doctors.

Considering the fact that clitoral pain (as well as infections, inflammation, and disease) are quite common, Chalmers contends that better understanding of the clitoris is essential. She adds that as the clitoris is closely tied to female sexual pleasure, the lack of knowledge about it amplifies inequality for women.”

Replace “women” with “cis women” and/or “people assigned female at birth” where appropriate.

+ “The ultimate pleasure of intimacy is that it is informed by nothing else but the vulnerability of being totally alone with another person, vis-à-vis, without our phones,” notes Reba Maybury, founder of Wet Satin Press, in conversation with Matthew Holroyd at Dazed on sexuality, consumerism, capitalism, technology and desire. She also notes: “There is nothing sexier than possibility.”

+ At Oh Joy Sex Toy, Alex Reeder writes about puppy play.

+ There is no safe way to be choked during sex. Sorry.

+ Stop apologizing to your partner(s) for every day things that don’t necessarily deserve an apology. Start saying thank you instead:

“Rima Danielle Jomaa, a marriage and family therapist, is a big fan of gratitude-based communication. She says, When we can approach each relationship and interaction in our lives from a space of gratitude rather than frustration, guilt, or resentment, amazing things can happen. If we remember to do it consistently, this behavior will permeate to a general state of well-being.'”

Valentine and Calico in Crash Pad Series episode 232

+ You can hug someone through the internet.

+ Working through disagreements is the key to successful long-term relationships. So is maintaining a sense of self.

+ Your personality online can reveal how you feel about your relationship(s), according to a new study.

+ Does Netflix ruin relationships? Only if watching a show ahead of a partner is how you determine relationship satisfaction, according to a study by Netflix.

+ “[T]here is no doubt about the significant political progress made in society thanks to the invaluable contributions made by sex workers throughout history. More often than not, this has gone unrecognised,” notes Juno Mac in an interview at Broadly on sex workers’ hidden, ground-breaking activism.

Geena and Wings in Crash Pad Series episode 49

+ Vibrator company We-Vibe recorded and tracked the temperature and vibration intensity of its We-Vibe 4 couples’ vibrator without users’ consent, and will now pay customers up to $10,000 CDN each because of a recent class-action lawsuit. On the air of scandal that many many media are taking in their coverage, Epiphora writes:

“Only We-Vibe had access to the data, and they then used it to… improve their products. I’m not saying it was okay for them to do this without telling us, or that consumers don’t have a right to be pissed. But is this worth boycotting an otherwise reputable company over? In my opinion, no. […]

I can’t help but feel like sex negativity had a role in this, though. When the initial news came out it was constantly presented in an inflammatory way by the media, as if sexual data is somehow more egregious to collect than ALL the other data ALL other apps collect. We opt in to (or don’t opt out of) so much shit on our phones, we give up our privacy all the time, but OH GOD! The privacy of THE BEDROOM!”

Siouxsie Q and Ozrael in Crash Pad Episode 180


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Carolyn Yates is the NSFW Editor and Literary Editor for Autostraddle.com. Her writing has appeared in Bitch, Nylon, Refinery29, The Toast, Xtra!, Jezebel, and elsewhere. She recently moved to Los Angeles from Montreal. Find her on twitter.

Carolyn has written 782 articles for us.

6 Comments

  1. The article on choking bugs me. Rather than preach abstinence (’cause that works super well, right?), I’d like to see a harm reduction approach that acknowledges that people are gonna do what they do, and help them to understand and mitigate the risks.

    • Me too. A safe to do it is to have your partner apply some light pressure to the base of the neck for the sensation of having their hands around your throat and then hold your breathe.

      It feels extremely close to actually being choked but since you are just holding your breathe you can start breathing again at any time.

    • the article reads a little tongue in cheek to me, but also yes hello i am that sensitive! i think it’s less about the tv shows themselves and more about sharing experiences. if you’ve been watching a show with someone and then they watch without you, it seems to say that they don’t care about experiencing that thing with you.

  2. I had no idea whatsoever about puppy play.
    Even though I’m not into kink at all, it always gives me hope that people are creating safe spaces where they can explore the different sides of themselves in a loving and respectful manner.
    And by that I mean in a self-loving and respectful of each other’s boundaries and bodies and desires manner.

  3. ahhh i love juno mac thanks for sharing the article she wrote on sex work!

    also, def. respect the risks of choking during sex………… but as someone who is still definitely going to do that, i’m way more into harm reduction than abstinence!

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