Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to talk about those people whose birthdays we still remember, every damn year, despite them not actually being in our life anymore. It’s annoying! It’s bittersweet! It’s perhaps a memento from an earlier time when we did not have Google calendars that would remind us of these things!
Monday Roundtable: How Could I Forget?
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I have a knack for remembering birthdays, so I still remember those of most of the people I went to primary school with. Sometimes I’m like ‘I feel like there’s something about today that I’m forgetting’ and then later I realize it’s the birthday of a former classmate..
I have the same problem. My brain just holds onto that information whether I want it or not
Same
My best friend for the last two years of high school was born on March 4th. I remember this because she would insist that it was the only date in the entire calendar that was also a sentence, i.e., “March forth!” I pointed out that “March first!” is also a sentence, as is, for that matter, “March Twentieth!” We did not remain friends after high school, but every fourth of March I remember her and how she was wrong and how I had to correct her instead of just letting her enjoy her version of things, so the day comes with a twinge of regret that I’m not a nicer person.
I also may have pointed out that, since questions are also sentences, “May one?” etc. also qualify. I was a pedant then and now and I don’t have a lot of friends.
I don’t think about birthdays a lot, but not a year goes by that I don’t think about my childhood dog every time I see her birthday (August 3) in the calendar. She passed away in 2002.
I’m kind of glad I never knew my abusive ex’s birthday*, because I’d hate to be triggered by the calendar.
* We were together for two years, but he didn’t know his own actual birthday due to some immigration/calendar/disinterested parents issue.
I still wish my high school ex a happy birthday every year (it’s tomorrow!) and Nov 13th is probably always going to be a heavy date in my heart.
An awful abusive person’s birthday is the day after my best friend’s birthday which caused a lot of emotional whiplash for me in high school. Now I…hardly ever think about it, really.
I remember my childhood best friend’s birthday to this day. Because mine is September 28 and his is March 28, so we have opposite birthdays which somebody told me means we are supposed to be enemies? Mainly I remember though because my mom’s birthday is April 28 and she said we were all in the 28 Club. Anyway. We havent spoken since i think 6th grade when his building burned down and he had to move, but at some point in the past decade he friended me on facebook and I followed his instagram, and it’s clear as day that we have nothing in common and no need to ever say another word to each other, but i remember his birthday and am glad that he’s doing well.
I don’t remember birthdays (I have a friend WITH MY SAME BIRTHDAY! Guess how often I’ve forgotten), but I will always remember my first elementary school best friend’s phone number, even though she chose the mean girl path come third grade. Peace be with you, pal! I wonder if that’s still your parents’ number!
I remember phone numbers too and I’m always half-tempted to call them and see who answers now. Also my current cell phone number is weirdly similar to one of my childhood home phone numbers.
Those phone numbers can be good passwords/PIN numbers, I guess
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO US BOTH, QG
hold up, we share a birthday?
P.S. I would read the heck out of an Interview with my Ex…Friend between Heather and that other queer artist!
I had a dream last night that I met a set of twins who were born the day before me, then I woke up and read this post about birthdays and birthday twins. (I also dreamt that I had lush, glossy, cat-fur-like hair growing on my legs, so if you publish a post about body hair today I’m going to assume you’ve been mining my subconscious.)
Anyway, I have several people who I used to be close to but then we dwindled down over the years to just texting or emailing each other on our birthdays, and in the last year or so I’ve decided to let go of that (and they seem to have too). But I still think of them on or around their respective days. Also my brother passed away on his birthday, which was a week and a half after mine, so that’s always a roller coaster time of year for me.
<3 <3 <3
I’ll always remember the birthday of the girl who sat next to me in homeroom in 9th grade, July 16th, because it was the day that the 6th Harry Potter book was released, and I remember being so completely jealous of her that such an event was happening on her birthday.
Am I the only person who ALWAYS remembers birthdays? Like, I remember EVERYONE’S birthday – every girl in my friend group from elementary school, every person I’ve ever dated or seriously crushed on. So it’s not surprising or strange when I remember someones birthday, it doesn’t really mean much.
Definitely not! My brain holds onto all kinds of random things, including birthdays. (Do I really need to know the birthdays of people I haven’t seen in 30 years?)
I remeber an ex friends birthday cause it’s on 4/20, but that’s an ease one to forget. I also remember an ex’s birthday cause for some unknown reason can’t delete her number off my phone, but also her birthday is on the last day of Spring.
I don’t remember the birthday of anybody I went to school with. Except my twin sister. I do know all of my dogs birthdays.
I still know the birthday of one of my exes. We were both Leos and I thought we would be together forever. I always think of her on her birthday.
Now What’s the Use of Feeling (Blue) is stuck in my head. Such a good song!
I’m the absolute worst with birthdays. I needed mnemonic devices to remember my parents’ birthdays until I was in high school, ffs. I love the idea of birthdays, but numbers and I are mortal enemies!!
I’ve known one of my oldest friends for over 15 years and every year I think her birthday is in November instead of October and fail to wish her happy birthday in time. The only thing I can tell you is that in high school I knew like five people who were born on May 12, but now I can’t remember who most of them were (except my first adolescent love, bless them). I’m not at all proud of this trait.
Two weeks ago I forgot my own child’s birthday in front of a medical professional. They were surprised. I was not.
Safe to say I do not remember any random birthdays.
My dad.
my dog and my mom have the same birthday and despite my mom owning that birthday for twenty more years of my life than my dog, i remember Hank’s first. read into my relationship w my mother as you will
This weekend was the 30th birthday of my very best friend that I had a falling out with only last month (well, the final fallout, after months of unsolvable arguments and tears). I spent all day thinking about it and ended up letting my roommate text them birthday wishes so it didn’t go 100% unacknowledged. I’m still miserable, but it was nice to read this post and hope that maybe one day it will be a wistful remembrance instead of a horrible ache of hurt.
not specifically related but whenever i hear/read “”how could i ever forget?” i think of this song (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1NpfRD_6JrY) from next to normal (tw child death and spoilers for next to normal) and just get teary eyed mostly
My Ex-Girlfriend’s birthday is the day before mine, there’s really no way to forget that. January 23th. The birthday I hate I still remember is my best friend’s from high school. We kind of had a bad friend-break up after many years being very close. I wish I had hope I’d just forget it one day, but I still remember so many birthdays even from elementary school so I probably just won’t. So here’s to March 20th.
Carrie, did you date my ex-best friend?? Her birthday is also Bastille Day and she always made a big deal about it. We had a very dramatic falling out about 4 years ago because her boyfriend was racist to me! Good times.
I’ll always remember my ex-boyfriend’s birthday (September 17) purely out of spite because he was so bad at remembering my birthday.
I have more birthday twins than anyone I know and I remember all of them. I’ve even got a mental list of folks born the day before mine as in middle school there were several and we’d jok about the fluidity of time and how wwe could still be birthday twins if our birth-times were less than 24 hours apart.
I’ll always remember my last real boyfriend due to the discovery of Flag Day, my college best friend’s loathing as Star Wars Day outshown him, and my ex-queerplatonic best friends birthday as it nearly bookends our friendship, 2011 to 2014.
hmu if your birthday’s feb 9 and you need more birthday twins lol
I’m still in touch with a couple friends that I grew up with and remember their birthdays, but the weird ones that have lodged themselves in there are the girl I was bffs with in like 2nd-5th grade (It’s October 3rd!), the boy I had an all-consuming crush on in 6th and 7th grade (June 7th), and the girl who was one of my best friends and whose heart I broke and later had a horrible falling out with junior year (June 13th). I definitely get a little ping of recognition on those days every year even after all this time. Brains are funny.