In my humble opinion, “spooky season” is not a thing, because horror should be appreciated year-round. Forget Christmas! There should be a 12 days of Halloween!!! If you’re the kind of person — or if you know the kind of person — who hosts scary movie marathons and seeks out haunted houses well past the month of October, well this is the gift guide for you! Specifically, I made this gift guide as an homage to the final girls. Whether you want to dress like a final girl, channel the energy of one, frighten yourself with a book, or wear your love of horror for all to see, I’ve got you covered with this final girls gift guide.
(Not sure if you have what it takes to be a final girl? Take the horror movie stock characters quiz I made to find out!)
Steal Her Look
Every final girl’s got a signature look, and even if their clothes inevitably end up covered in blood, they know how to dress under duress. For some reason, I’ve always found it hilarious that Sidney Prescott puts her jean jacket back on immediately after having sex in the first Scream movie, because you know what? That’s dyke culture. Also all of the fashion choices in the original Halloween are such a perfect late-70s time capsule. Fun fact: Most of it came from JCPenny.
In Case Of Emergency
See also: Abeni’s excellent apocalypse survival gift guide from last year. It simply never hurts to be prepared! Every true final girl knows that! Also, in all seriousness, upgrading my kitchen knives was a gamechanger. My girlfriend got me a great Japanese chef’s knife for Christmas last year, and I love it so much. And theoretically, it could probably serve additional purposes.
Listen, if you have what it takes to be a final girl, then you simply gotta show that shit off. Sidney Prescott has lifetime bragging rights tbh. Etsy is full of final girl stuff, and a lot of it is under $30!
For the bookish final girls, I’ve got some recs! The Final Girl Support Group is a fun and fast read, and one of the characters is a lesbian who lives on a ranch with her wife. Manhunt unfortunately does not come out in time for the holiday season (publishing on 2/22/22), but preorders are super helpful for authors! And indie bookstores are particularly slammed during the holiday season. Give the gift of a preorder! Give the gift of trans horror fiction! Carmen Maria Machado called it “a modern horror masterpiece.” Nothing But Blackened Teeth is a short n haunting read (THAT COVER), and Queer Fear is a Lambda Award-nominated anthology of queer horror fiction. There was also a second volume.
I love this (and really enjoyed The Final Girl Support Group!) and would LOVE more horror book content in general! Also you know what isnt here that everyone should also be screaming about: MY HEART IS A CHAINSAW!!
While they don’t have a lot of merch for sale (for the purpose of a gift guide), I feel that the podcast Gaylords of Darkness would be of interest to many fans of final girls, so I’ve gotta give them a shout out. If a cutie ever sent me a holiday card with a picture of a wig and a note saying that they’d contributed dollars to the podcast in my honor I would feel properly romanced.