Playlist: One More Time Without Feeling

feature image via shutterstock

Let me give you a little background on the concept for this playlist. Phil Kaye, a very talented poet, has a piece called “Repetition” where he tells us his mom taught him that “if you repeat something enough times, it loses its meaning.” That’s where this playlist comes in.

Lovingly crafted, this is a playlist that goes through the valleys and peaks & valleys and peaks again that queers might experience in a true to the bone on-and-off relationship. There’s a surprising amount of upbeat songs out there that are written by pretty heartbroken people, folks. Here’s a collection of those songs, in case dancing, singing, and a roller-coaster of emotions play a part in the way you process the end of a relationship, too.

My dog, Tango, while listening to the playlist for the first time.

My dog, Tango, while listening to the playlist for the first time.

A celebration of the good and the bad, play this list over, and over, and over again if you’re hoping for the longing to lose its meaning. And by longing I mean that Magnetic Zeros song smacked right in the heart of it.

Nobody to Love – Sigma
Stars – The XX
Rather Be (feat. Jess Glynne) – Clean Bandit
Boats & Birds – Gregory and The Hawk
Waves – Mr. Probz
Monday Morning – Melanie Fiona
La Familia – Mirah
Baby Come Home – Scissor Sisters
Crazy – Kat Dahila
Say You’ll Be There – MØ
Give Up – FKA twigs
I Don’t Want To Get Over You – The Magnetic Fields
I Eat Dinner (When the Hunger’s Gone) – Rufus Wainwright & Emmylou Harris
Fuck Was I – Jenny Owen Youngs
Call It Off – Tegan & Sara
You Don’t Love Me (No, No, No) – Dawn Penn
Dust Clears (feat. Noonie Bao) – Clean Bandit
Young Blood – The Naked and Famous

Want to suggest a playlist theme? Hit Stef up and someone on the team might make it for you.

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Araguaney R. Da Silva

Araguaney R. Da Silva is a Venezuelan writer, interpreter, translator and facilitator living with their small dog and about fifty-seven houseplants in Portland, OR.

Araguaney has written 15 articles for us.


  1. Dani! Can’t wait to jump around to Call if off with you on Friday!

    Until then, I’ll just keep this playlist on repeat. So great. So so great.

  2. i’m not in this situation right now but i really enjoyed this playlist! “call it off” gets me every time though. ugh sadness.


    • I feel like the entirety of Heartthrob is an ode to on and off relationships. The temptation of including the whole album was real and challenging.

  3. Great looking playlist! But what’s with the move to Spotify lately? I’ve heard only questionable things about the way they compensate artists which has made me hesitate to get an account, but if all my favorite Autostraddle playlists are on there I might reconsider

  4. One of these songs is a song a forgot about – I was totally obsessed with it in high school. Thanks so much for helping me rediscover it! I’ve been lying in bed replaying it over and over.

  5. I’m late to the comment game, but this playlist now exist in CD form and has been playing non-stop in my aux-less vehicle for a couple days now.

    I wanted to tell you how I much I love it now before I play it on repeat for the over 4,000 miles I’ll be driving in the next two weeks. After that, it’s likely my feelings about this playlist will be drastically different.

    No regrets.

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