Feature image of Adina and Saffron in Crash Pad Series episode 303. All of the photographs in this NSFW Sunday are from the Crash Pad. The inclusion of a visual here should not be interpreted as an assertion of the model’s gender identity or sexual orientation. If you’re a photographer or model and think your work would be a good fit for NSFW Sunday, please email carolyn at autostraddle dot com.

Welcome to NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday!

Adina Powers and Scout in Crash Pad Series episode 286

Everyone is horny on main these days, though it’s just as likely as to be for vegan cheese as for getting choked during sex. Here’s what’s up with that:

“”Today, being horny is about having a lust for life in spite of all evidence that we should dig a hole and hide in a fallout shelter,” Dodes writes. Horniness in 2020 is simply a catchier way of being enthusiastic or earnest about your want for something that is decidedly non-sexual—it is about the intensity of your desire and not the desire itself, therefore making it even more shameful to actually express desire in ways that feel meaningful. Tweeting about how horny you are for vegan cheese is much easier than tweeting about how horny you are for getting lightly choked during sex, though your enthusiasm levels for both might be the same. Telling someone you’re actively having sex with that you want them to call you a slut not because you are but because you like it is tough work! Trust makes for good sex, but so does a healthy sense of humor.”

Jacquie Blu and Valerie Paige in Crash Pad Series episode 294

These sex etc startups are the ones to watch.

Here’s how to get a girl to not sleep over.

“[A]t a certain point, we must ask ourselves the same thing I scream at my TV every time a Bachelor contestant confesses to keeping their ‘walls up’ all the way until Hometowns: Are you really keeping your walls up, or do you just not like this person???“

What would decriminalizing sex work look like?

Adina and Saffron in Crash Pad Series episode 303

Trying to find a place to store your nudes on your phone that’s less obvious than your camera roll? Consider, a calculator app:

“PIN protection goes a long way. But maybe a cunning disguise goes further, which is why, if I’m choosing my fighter, I’m choosing a — drumroll, please — calculator app.

‘Hiding photos behind a password-protected screen is the old way,’ explains Natalya Bakatanova, a Russian app developer I found while scrolling through the App Store. ‘Everybody knows that you have secrets, so they want to know what’s there.’ Bakatanova made an app called the Calc X Private Photo Vault, just one in a sprawling sea of storage platforms configured to look like a calculator from the outside, and to conceal a cache of sensitive content within.”

Cinnamon and Cicatriz in Crash Pad Series episode 169

“[E]very current event ends up as a porn eventually” – so of course coronavirus porn is here.

Here are some (probable) answers to questions around safer sex and the coronavirus, including whether or not it can spread via butt stuff (yes), whether you should Purell your genitals (no), and how to deal with kissing:

“[K]issing rules, so rather than avoiding it until the outbreak subsides, be extra-judicious about who you’re kissing. Perhaps avoid making out with anyone who’s recently traveled to or through an area with a high number of cases, or anyone who’s on quarantine and waiting to see if they’re infected. Because symptoms are, again, proving to be quite mild in most young people, you won’t be able to tell whether someone is sick just by looking at them. Asking people if they have reason to suspect they may have come into contact with coronavirus is fair game in these frantic times (but don’t be racist about it).

When in doubt, just think about this chilling quote from the New York Times, which will never leave my brain: ‘If you can smell what someone had for lunch—garlic, curry, etc.—you are inhaling what they are breathing out, including any virus in their breath.'”

Scout and Lew Pine in Crash Pad Series episode 227

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