No Filter: Premiere Sagittarius Janelle Monáe Would Love to Bake You a Birthday Cake Filled With Rainbows and Smiles

Welcome, children, and gather round for yet another week of queer celebrity Instagram presented on a bed of arugula. This week, somebody’s publicist is working overtime to make sure we are aware that Demi Moore might have a gal pal! If this is true, Moore and “Serbian sexpot” Masha Mandzuka have been together for about two years and appear to be raising Mandzuka’s daughter Rumi together! Something about the way this is appearing in the tabloids feels a little cynical to me but what do I know? Masha certainly looks like she possibly dressed as a “Celebrity’s Badly-Kept-Secret Girlfriend” for Halloween this year. Perhaps there are clues in Demi’s social media?

This sounds a whole lot like the giddy thoughts of a woman who’s having a cool fun sexy time with her cool fashionable “Serbian sexpot” gal pal, right? CASE CLOSED.
We begin this week as we should begin all weeks, with a celebration of the birth of Premiere Sagittarius (apologies to Britney Spears) Janelle Monáe.

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Butcher & Baker

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This is a powerful photo of one very funny person and one person who writes very sad songs… are these IRL comedy and tragedy masks? Is that what we’re doing here?

Evan Rachel Wood is working hard to develop her Business Mommi aesthetic.
Business Mommi Part 2.

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Who be attending the pussy is god tour?

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King Princess will have the poached eggs and creamed spinach, please.

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When the swag matches the couch

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Everybody really looks like they’re in a cozy catalog this week! Imagine snuggling up to this scrunch-faced angel OR every item she’s wearing in this picture.

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I did a makeup 💄

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It appears that the smoldering Teddy Geiger just so happens to be in the market for some winter clothing.

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Looking like a fake ass college dropout.

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I assume this photo is from Lena Waithe’s house but I’d like to imagine that she’s actually outside your apartment door, coming to ask if you’d like to go for a walk in the quad.
Beans Dunn the Male Novelist is branching out into audiobooks and personally I’m all for it.
Flip through to the very last image for a treat from me to you.

Join us next week when we delve further into the mysteries of Demi Moore.

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Stef Schwartz is a founding member and the self-appointed Vapid Fluff Editor at She currently resides in New York City, where she spends her days writing songs nobody will ever hear and her nights telling much more successful musicians what to do. Follow her on twitter and/or instagram.

Stef has written 464 articles for us.


  1. I noticed that Tessa posted birthday wishes to Janelle and Janelle responded/regrammed (whatever it is!) and I was happy that they are at least still friends!

  2. O.M.G. I am literally watching GI Jane right now (to celebrate my promotion, no biggy, this is indeed how I celebrate.)
    Thank you also for Samira Wiley to help me celebrate more. :-D

  3. I know we try to stay away from paparazzi pics but Chloe Grace Moretz was recently spotted smooching a model…am I behind? Is this already known and out there? Help

  4. Look I know it’s a bit silly to be extremely happy when you discover you share the same birthday as someone you admire so much but when I found out I had the same birthday as Janelle (and Zoe Kravitz) I got irrationally excited and I’m ok with it

      • Also I considered hard whether to go with Tessa-elated, Tessalation, Tessalated etc…

        I mean, I wouldn’t like you to think these terrible puns were effortless.

  5. I think the biggest clue is actually Demi hashtagging #nofilters – I mean that obviously means she feels she ought to be included in this and future posts, right?

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