Spooner is surprised to learn she can read the alien language on the screen of the pod (“giant air feeder”) and she’s afraid that it’s not the sauce part of the sauce monster they should be worried about.

I love a good “figuring out your powers” arc so I’m excited to learn what else Spooner can do.

When Ava comes to, she sees Mrs. Burger harvesting sauce of the cocoon like a beekeeper getting honey from a comb. Seeing that the woman already has encountered the inexplicable, Ava decides to go with honesty and tells Mrs. Burger about how the woman she loves, the woman she’s going to marry, got abducted by aliens, and that this cocoon is one of them, and it could help her find Sara.

“Well you see, I’m a lesbian on the CW, so you’re actually not allowed to kill me.”

Mrs. Burger doesn’t know what sounds crazier to her, Ava being a lesbian or the cocoon being a dangerous alien. Mrs. Burger explains how she found the “beautiful creature” when it was small, and that she thought the sauce could save her marriage and the family business. When Ava tries to explain to her that the whole town could be taken over by this meat craze, all Mrs. Burger hears is the opportunity to franchise, and that’s when it’s clear she’s beyond reason. So Spooner returns the head bonking favor and knocks her out. Ava has never been so happy to see the alien tracker.

“You’re little but you’re big!”

Back at Big Belly Burger, Zari has an idea: one of her tea powders is meant to calm you down, so maybe they can use it to subdue the zombie hoard. She lets Behrad take the lead and says that instead of him being Dragon Girl’s brother, today she’ll be Burger Boy’s sister, and it sounds very silly but it’s actually a very sweet gesture.

LOOK AT HER IN HER LITTLE PAPER HAT. MUST. PROTEC.

So Behrad gives Zari the totem and together, with Nate, they get cooking.

Spooner and Ava realize that the alien goo making people crave meat was a means to fatten them up before the alien emerges for her first meal, and as Mrs. Burger comes to and the cocoon starts to hatch, they try to warn her, but she won’t listen. And thus, as soon as the moth-like alien emerges from its goo cocoon, it gobbles Mrs. Burger right up.

Ava yells that they have to contain it, but it flies up through the roof and away before they can do that. They give the rest of the Legends the heads up and head to Doublemeat PalaceBig Bang Burger.

The burger buddies have managed to put most of the zombies down using Zari’s sleepytime tea.

Me: *stares in insomniac*

So when they get Ava’s message, they start dragging them inside to hopefully shield them from the incoming moth monster they were warned about.

Mr. Burger comes out waving his arms and yelling at the Legends and soon joins his wife in the belly of the beast.

I thought this was interesting because it reminds us that even though this show is as goofy and wacky as it comes, there are still stakes. Two regular human people died! Granted, they were two human people who were willing to let an alien eat some people to make a buck, but they were still human people! I liked that it re-established the stakes, especially when two Legends’ lives are in the balance.

When Ava and Spooner get to the burger joint, Spooner asks Ava if she still wants to have a heart to heart with the alien, but Ava hands Spooner her alien blaster back and says, “Nah, light it up.”

Love a girl who can admit when she’s wrong and change course.

Spooner’s laser gun hits the alien, sending it flying back into the diner sign and frying it like a mosquito in a bug zapper. Ava is impressed.

I’m telling my grandchildren this was Cagney and Lacey.

Later that night, Spooner finds Ava in the study with two drinks. Ava says she poured one for Sara out of habit (:sob:) so she gives one to Spooner.

Spooner apologizes for not being able to find Sara, but Ava is far from quitting. She does apologize for being so pushy with Spooner and not taking her feelings into account during this mission because she understands what it’s like when you realize other people had more control over parts of your life than you would have liked, and that Spooner being vigilant doesn’t make her crazy.

Ava’s ability to be hard as steel in the field but soft as cotton when she needs to be is just so beautiful to me.

Ava asks if Spooner is willing to talk about what happened to her when she was a kid, and at first, out of habit, Spooner bristles. But then seeing that Ava has no agenda, and maybe seeing a familiar flavor of pain in her eyes, she tells her that all she really remembers is that her and her mom got taken, and when Spooner woke up, her mom was gone. Ava starts to ask if her mom could still be alive, but Spooner cuts her off. Hope is too hard. She’s too far past hope. The only think that kept her going all these years, the one thing that she sacrificed having a normal life for, was the idea of being able to kill an alien herself. But now that she’s done it…well, it turns out that vengeance didn’t fill the hole her mother left.

“And if that joy, that thrill, doesn’t thrill you like you think it will…”

Ava looks at the girl with compassion and asks Spooner if she wants to stay with them. Spooner is confused; she almost murdered a teenager making minimum wage, and she can’t control whatever is going on in her head that makes her able to sense aliens.

Listen, Mick is becoming a responsible adult, we have an opening for a grumpy rebel.

But Ava says they can help her train and learn; all the Legends were a bit of a mess when they joined, and frankly they’re still a bit of a mess now, but they’ve found a way to fit their broken shards together to make a beautiful, nerdy mosaic. And there’s plenty of room for more.

Spooner misunderstands the message a little and says that maybe she just needs to kill MORE aliens to feel that feeling of closure she’s chasing, and while that wasn’t exactly Ava’s point, at least she’s agreed to stay.

“We’ll work on that whole thirst for alien blood thing later.”

When Zari and Behrad check in on the new timeline of San Bernardino, they see a news clip of the waitress they saved, Sandy Sledge, revealing that she took over the diner and is starting her own restaurant: Big Belly Burger. And I thought this was very cute and rad, not only to know that the CWDVTV Universe’s favorite fast food place was founded and owned by a Black woman, but also that the Legends had a hand in making it happen. Sure it’s a little timey wimey but this show falls apart very quickly if you look with your hands and not with your eyes so it’s best to just observe and enjoy.

Having successfully worked as a team, the Tarazi siblings agree with each other about the totem…which results in them fighting over who gets the totem again, but this time the opposite way. Overhearing this from inside the totem, Zari Prime intervenes as only a big sister could, waving her hand and splitting the totem in two so that they can both have totem bracelets.

Glad being alone in the totem hasn’t made Zari dress or sit any less gay.

On the mystery planet, Sara and Gary finish dinner with Amelia Earhart, but when Sara tries to get them all to head back to the spaceship for repairs and/or escape, Amelia starts to…glitch. She starts repeating the story she told in the beginning, becoming desperate for them to not leave, and then she launches across the room and pins Sara against the wall, but not in the sexy way.

Consent is sexy, Amelia.

In fact, in quite the opposite of sexy ways, as she reveals her true alien form and bites Sara. Between Sara and Gary they manage to get Amelialien off of her and Gary walks Sara away but Sara got bit and she’s not looking so hot. Gary starts rambling about having to get Sara back for her wedding, talking about colors and themes, and Sara uses some of her last remaining energy to snark at Gary about not planning her wedding. They see lights in the distance and as Gary realizes they’re far too large and numerous to be helpful fireflies, Sara passes out.

Here’s hoping it’s just a bunch of cute dogs carrying flashlights!

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