Welcome back to No Filter, a column celebrating the week in celebrity nonsense. This week was notable because the Golden Globes happened (a big night for me personally) and also because Kristen and Stella spent a lot of time walking around Los Feliz acquiring smoothies. Everybody’s lookin’ so good! Everybody’s taking care of themselves in 2017! Everybody’s eating the right amount of servings of fruit per day! Let’s get right to work.
While a lot of us were busy losing our minds over another actress/musician’s tuxedo (a look Janelle has sported for years, also to great success), Janelle Monáe arrived in this badass geometric princess situation. It was her first ever Golden Globes and I’d say she rocked it.
Raise your hand if the first thing you did after Sarah won her Golden Globe was frantically refresh Holland Taylor’s account… but like, I can’t believe Sarah Paulson thinks Dunkin Donuts is coffee worth exercising for. Come at me.
You knew we’d get here. Evan (and her bandmate/creative partner Zach) rocked separate tuxedo looks and lived out their James Bond fantasies (and WESTWORLD WAS ROBBED). They looked painfully good.
As far as I can tell, the afterparties are the point of the whole damn thing anyway.
— Gillian Anderson (@GillianA) January 9, 2017
Gillian Anderson was literally just as bored as we were.
THIS IS SO CUTE.
— Cameron Esposito (@cameronesposito) January 6, 2017
Is there anything these three cannot accomplish? I WILL ANSWER THAT QUESTION FOR YOU, NO THERE IS NOT.
Starting the new year off by getting a tooth ripped out of my skull. Farewell gold crown, I wore the well. This tooth sang on every Against Me! recording. So many tasty meals shared together. Sad to see you go old friend but excited to meet your replacement "the implant" in a couple months. If anyone needs me I'll be sitting on my couch, lost in a Hydrocodone haze, playing video games.
If this tooth could talk.
Brittani Nichols, probably writing you a love letter.
Meredith Graves went to Havana probably 50% to escape the bitter New York winter and 50% so she could wear cute hats, A+.
Join us next week, when we hit the after-after-afterparties.