Spooner watches Doc and his band of bullies show up to Gloria’s house and threaten her. Gloria tells her daughter to run and as Esperanza runs off, she watches her mother get shot to death. Esperanza runs to the woods and bleeds on some mushrooms, and it triggers the alien abduction which is grown-up Spooner’s first memory. They were trying to protect her.
And thus Spooner learns that aliens aren’t the enemy after all. The patriarchy is.
When everyone comes to, Constantine is gone, and Astra locks eyes with Spooner and demands to talk to her outside.
Spooner explains what John showed her and says she has to stay to protect Gloria and Esperanza and Astra is panicking; she can’t just trust Constantine! But Spooner knows that Astra understand that if she has the chance to save her mother and get to grow up with her, she has to take it. Spooner looks like her mind is already made up and then Astra notices a bandaged cut on her hand and knows that it’s already too late, that John got what he wanted. And Astra is so, so sad.
Back at the mansion, the Legends see a glow and Kayla appears. Gary talks her down in their alien tongue and she humanizes her appearance. But she still comes at the Legends swinging, punches that Sara easily dodges as she tries to calm her down.
Mick explains the situation and Kayla is surprised Mick’s alive…though doesn’t seem particularly disappointed about it. She wants to leave immediately to save the babies, but before they go, Mick confesses that the social media post was faked, but her feelings for her are real. Ava and Sara are surprised by this rare display of genuine emotion from Mr. Rory.
But Kayla doesn’t have time for a feels fest, she wants to find the babies and she wants to find them now. So they head to her ship to chase down the Waverider.
On said Waverider, Bishop has successfully used the magic mushrooms to make a serum that would give Constantine the innocence of a child, making him more appealing to the fountain when they activate it. Astra tracks down Constantine on the ship and tries to bring him back to the Legends; it’s not too late for him to stop this. To help the Legends take down Bishop.
When he doesn’t even seem to be willing to consider that option, she looks disappointed in him. She says her mother was right about him, that he was toxic and dangerous. And Constantine says that Astra’s mother would be rolling in her grave if she knew Astra was dabbling in dark magic.
Before she can calm down enough to respond, he poofs her back to Gloria’s house.
The oil men show up right on schedule, and Spooner braces herself; this is it, this is her chance to change things. The men “generously” give them five minutes to come out peacefully and Gloria really wants to talk to them. But Spooner saw how that played out last time so she’s not having it.
Little Esperanza clings to Astra’s side, intuitively drawn to her for safety, and Astra looks surprised at first but takes it in stride. She leads her into the bedroom to read and stay safe.
Desperate and out of options, Spooner tells Gloria that she’s Esperanza all grown up and promises to protect her.
Gloria hugs Spooner tight and Astra watches sadly from the doorway. Maybe equal parts because she knows she could lose her Spooner forever, and because she knows what it’s like to get your mom back for just a moment as an adult only to lose her again.
Astra steps forward and only voices the first part of this. She says history will completely change, Spooner will never have met the Legends and helped them save Sara, and…she and Spooner would never have become friends. Friends! Astra Logue, former queen of hell, doesn’t want to lose her FRIEND. And she says as much, in as many words, right to Spooner’s face.
Gloria is still reeling from the idea that this badass in front of her is her grown daughter. Spooner pleads with her to let them help her; she says she grew up without her mother, and the day she lost her consumed her. She became bitter and angry, she didn’t become the person her mother wanted her to be. Gloria almost laughs in her face. She’s only known Spooner for a few hours and nothing is more obvious than how brave she is. She’s also standing here trying desperately to save her life, showing she has a huge heart. And her little girl, who loved sci-fi novels at a young age and always wanted to go on adventures…is a literal time traveler. She exceeded all her expectations, and she’s proud of her.
Gloria says she thinks this reunion was meant to be, that they were saved by faith in each other, but also she thinks this reunion has to be just that. A brief reconnection, a proper goodbye. Because she wants to preserve the timeline. She wants history to stay intact. Because she, too, is brave and full of heart, just like Spooner.
All that decided, Astra says she’ll take Esperanza to the fountain to make sure she gets taken by the aliens just like it happened the first time while Spooner stays with Gloria.
Out in the forest, Constantine pours out Spooner’s blood in the spot they think the fountain is located and the mushrooms start to glow. A pillar of light emerges from the forest floor and a giant mushroom blooms.
Back at the cabin, Spooners hands start to glow and she knows it’s time to get moving. Gloria says goodbye to little Esperanza, a goodbye Spooner never got to have, and Astra squeezes Spooner’s arm while they watch.
Gloria calls Esperanza her strong and fearless girl, and sends her out the back door with Astra.
Before the disappear into the woods, Spooner calls out, “Take care of me,” and Astra says, “Always.”
AND LISTEN. Listen. I was trying to watch this episode through a regular Astra/Spooner friendship lens instead of my Spatula shipper glasses. Because genuinely I am so in love with the idea of these two self-proclaimed loners finding each other and bonding. The cowgirl and the queen of hell. I’m a sucker for an unlikely friendship. It’s like how cheetahs are sometimes given emotional support labradors. It doesn’t make sense on paper but it just WORKS. And I love it. But then.
BUT THEN. This line?? This exchange??? “Take care of me.” “Always.” THAT’S SOME TRUE LOVE SHIT RIGHT THERE. And maybe it wasn’t written that way. Maybe this isn’t going anywhere romantic. But if any CW show was going to have two wlw relationships in one main cast, it would be Legends.
Either way, this moment marks huge growth for both of them. Spooner “I’ll shoot you if you don’t stop talking to me right now” Cruz asking for help and Astra “I’ll banish your soul to hell if you don’t stop talking to me right now” Logue promising protection. It’s a beautiful thing.
Spooner and Gloria face the evil men and Spooner is filled with rage. Her hands start to glow and a pulse of light goes through her and into Doc’s feet, holding him in place. She wants him to feel her pain, her anguish. Doc’s men quickly abandon him and Spooner yells out, “I am my mother’s daughter and this will never be your land.”
And so the douchecanoe runs away, and Gloria is saved. So Spooner will still grow up without her, but at least she has the closure of both knowing what happened and that she’s okay.
Astra takes Esperanza to the fountain and when the girl says she’s scared, Astra reassures her. She says it will be scary at first, but not always. Someday she’ll find friends, a family. “You’re even going to see me again,” she says with a gentle smile, doing absolutely nothing for my ship but add wind to its sails.
Constantine uses magic to yeet Astra deeper into the forest and she looks around frantically for the girl she vowed to protect, but not to worry, the mushroom has already started to take away her little Spoon.
Spooner can feel it happening, and Gloria is sad her baby is gone, but knows her daughter is still with her, in more than one sense of the word. They hug and hug and it’s beautiful and emotional and I swear to Beebo I was on the verge of tears this whole damn episode.
Kayla’s ship lands near the Waverider, and as half the remaining Legends rush to the ship to save the egg babies, Zari pulls Nate aside. She knows exactly where Constantine will be, and even though she doesn’t know exactly where the fountain is, she suspects perhaps following the unnatural glow coming from the forest is a good place to start.
Bishop is ready to start the process of having the fountain select John, but when he reaches for the serum, he finds his pocket empty. Constantine smirks a haughty smirk and waggles the stolen syringe before injecting himself. Something starts to react but Bishop tells him what he’s feeling isn’t the fountain, it’s the poison Bishop put in the serum. Because there’s nothing more predictable than that man’s arrogance.
The rest of the Legends find the room that the eggs are stored in, but Bishop has rigged the incubator with bombs so they have a precious few moments to save all the babies.
They work together and are on their way out of the room when they notice one stray egg on the floor. Mick decides to vy for a Father of the Year award and sprints toward the one remaining egg, but it’s too late; he gets caught in the explosion.
Back in the forest, Bishop calls Constantine collateral damage. You see, Bishop did make it so the fountain would choose Constantine, linking them, and then it would kill Constantine, effectively getting rid of the fountain forever. Because turns out, the fountain was providing a thin layer of protection to keep the Earth safe from invasive alien species. And he wants to invade, dammit. So once again, Constantine didn’t even bother to consider the consequences of his selfish quests, and this time instead of dooming a young girl’s soul to hell, he has doomed the whole damn Earth.
Out front, Spooner can feel the fountain dying, and she falls to the ground and passes out because of her connection to it.
Astra finds Constantine and wants to help him; she is so, so furious at him, even though he ruined her entire life, he’s also the only person she’s known her entire life, so she wants to help him.
He mutters that he can hear the fountain screaming, and Zari shows up just as the ground starts to send roots up to consume him. And so he returns to the earth, ashes to ashes, as the two most important (living) women in his life kneel by his side.
I want to believe he’s gone for how dramatic his death was, but the truth is, dead hardly ever means gone on this show. And I’m pretty sure Bishop made a clone of him.
But next week is the season finale (ahh!) and it looks like we might just finally get that Avalance wedding we’ve been waiting for. See you then!