How We Survived Lesbian Bed Death

It's time for another edition of SE(N)O, an essay series on A+ for personal stories we wish we could tell on the accessible-to-our-employers-and-everyone-we've-ever-known mainsite, but can't for personal and professional reasons.

Oh hi there. You are here to read this piece, which is super special and really personal, which's why I'm writing this super-long run-on sentence because although this entire essay is available to A+ members, the first paragraph of this essay is visible to everybody including search engines and employers and family members and this is just way too personal for that, so if you can only see this part you should really consider becoming an A+ member because then you will be contributing to our Survival Fund and you will be able to look beyond this paragraph and get the real story I'd really like to share with you because I love you and you are really smart and your hair looks great today and I feel like you and I could have something special, like this p...

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This might be an awkward way to ask for it, but here goes: we know you like Autostraddle, and we like you a whole lot too. Advertisers and investors, on the other hand? Well, independently-owned politically progressive LGBTQ women's media isn't exactly their thing. It's do or die for us now: either we shore up enough reader support to compensate for the slowdown in ad sales and increasing competition from corporate-owned LGBTQ media, or we shut down altogether.

That's why we've created Autostraddle Plus. It's a way for loyal readers like you to support the site for as little as $5 a month, and in return get a peek behind the curtain of Autostraddle with posts like this one, A+ swag, podcasts, Insider "newsletters," and essays/interviews from the previously-very-hidden parts of our hearts, souls and pants. Best of all, you're helping us keep Autostraddle.com free for everybody — free of cost, and also free from the inevitable compromises made by sites that cater to marketers, not readers.

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KaeLyn is a 37-year-old (femme)nist activist, word nerd, and queer mama. You can typically find her binge-watching TV, over-caffeinating herself, standing somewhere with a mic or a sign in her hand, eating carbs, or just generally doing too many things at once. She lives in Rochester, NY with her spouse, a baby T. rex, a xenophobic cat, and a rascally rabbit. You can buy her debut book, Girls Resist! A Guide to Activism, Leadership, and Starting a Revolution if you want to, if you feel like it, if that's a thing that interests you or whatever.

KaeLyn has written 211 articles for us.