I moved to California from Shanghai at fourteen and threw myself into learning how to be an American. It’s a lot like doing drag.
“Sometimes, when we allow ourselves to open a door, to open a possibility, the weight of that possibility and that choice is damn heavy – and overwhelming.”
If I could tell everyone how to differentiate between gender expression feels and gender feels, I’d be Sovereign Ruler of Gender and maybe things would be easier, but probably also a lot less fun.
We’ve got 29 gorgeous questions and like 100 answers, so if you need help and you asked for it, you might find it in here. Casual hookups, breakups, threesomes, gender uncertainty, dating a co-worker, letting her down easy and so much more!
“Other people built a gender for me and trusted that I would defend what they built. But what I was handed never made sense.”
“A lot of the narrative about gender questioning at large is about tragedy, about what we lose. I encourage you (even though I know it’s challenging) to think about your gender from a different angle. What makes you feel affirmed?”
We’re all lucky enough to see an exclusive preview of this book about dresses, gender, true selves and love right here.
What should you do about a baby’s pronouns, how do you and your girlfriend both propose to each other, and how do you stop holding a candle for an idealized past? Come on in!
“Why can’t I just let it roll off me? And do you think there’s a way to react that might make the situation a little less miserable for me?”
Our gender is not a burden, the binary mainstream society is. You are wonderful, I’m so proud of you for reaching out. Take what works from my suggestions, and know I’ll be hoping it all turns out for the best.
Polyamorous parenting, gossip, the creator of our rainbow flag has died, the conspiracies of Trumpland, that fucking wall is going to fuck with wildlife, and so much more!
As my gender expression changes, so does who I’m attracted to.
Like 85 links to keep you staring at your computing device like this ? for approximately the entire weekend. You’re welcome!
These gender non-conforming clothes are heckin’ cute, kitten wedding?? kinda!, picnic destinations, dogs, bathing suits, Gilda Radner, this feminist bookstore, perfume, and so much more!
Malaysia’s High Court allowed a trans man to update his Identity Card to reflect his current name and gender identity. This possibly paradigm-changing ruling on IC changes opens the door for reviews of other anti-LGBTQ laws.
We now live in a world where it is totally possible to claim the same word as someone else and completely disagree on what the word means.
Kristin, co-founder of Everyone is Gay, and musician Allison Weiss have teamed up to bring you OUR Restroom, a campaign that works to educate businesses on the importance of unisex bathrooms.
“Gender self-determination is vital and I can feel great about who I am when I am at home. But I live a life where I engage with other people and doing what feels good for me is a lot more challenging when I step outside the door. With pronouns specifically, it’s hard not to feel like you are dependent on others to ‘validate’ your gender, or rather, it’s hard not to feel like your gender is not valid when people use the wrong pronoun.”
Warland, and Oscar of Between, is refreshingly unconcerned with being there already. Instead, she deep-dives into the potency of occupying transitional spaces, the beauty of being in-between.
“My goopy brain instantly convinced me that this event would singularly make or break our relationship and that if it went poorly it would be my fault. But I swallowed my anxiety and said yes. Then I immediately started thinking about my outfit.”