Quiz: What Espresso Drink Are You?

Since I bought an espresso machine, I’ve been a changed woman. I usually start my day with two Americanos and a big Hydroflask of water and then get to work once I’m blissfully caffeinated. I haven’t explored making different espresso drinks much, but I know there are so many to choose from, so many delicious drinks at my fingertips now!

If you are espresso machine gang, I salute you. Having one has definitely made me a little bougie-er. With all the drinks possible with one, it’s only natural to ask which one you are, which one is most energetically aligned with you as a person. I think I know what I am but I can’t be sure until I take this quiz, as you should.

You are at a cafe sipping a drink and reading a book/working on your novel. A cute and bold stranger pulls out the chair across from you and sits down, how do you react:(Required)
Pick a Sade song:(Required)
Pick a date spot:(Required)
What's a statement piece that is usually part of your outfits?(Required)
Choose an R&B/Soul legend:(Required)
Mysterious stranger from the first scenario (who we learn is named Dee) is back and they have asked you on a date to the park. What do you bring?(Required)
What are you wearing on this date?(Required)
In your dream scenario, what does Dee do for a living?(Required)

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Dani Janae is a poet and writer based out of Pittsburgh, PA. When she's not writing love poems for unavailable women, she's watching horror movies, hanging with her tarantula, and eating figs. Follow Dani Janae on Twitter and on Instagram.

danijanae has written 157 articles for us.


  1. So, I got cortado, which I’ve never heard of. So I looked it up, and it’s what I make with my Nespresso already, ai just thought I invented it. So spot on, is what I’m saying.

  2. I got Cortado “ You’re a real sweetheart, great energy, all of the truth and realness of an espresso person but without the acidity.”

    But mostly i learnt that there is more than one way of expresso?!!

  3. I confess, it’s true I am the kind of person that scoffs about Caramel Macchiatos at Starbucks because they don’t do it the “traditional” way but I only scoff at Starbucks not the people ordering. I just maybe judge them a little but I am working on it okay?! But also I can’t help pointing out that the image that went with my result is not, in fact, a macchiato. I assume this was on purpose, just to doubly call me out on my bullshit

  4. I haven’t been to Starbucks for a good scoffing session in some time, but that’s because I can’t stand their coffee at all. I’ll stick to local roasters who roast the beans properly and scoff at Starbucks from a distance.

  5. Love the description, but wtf is an affogato when it’s at home? From the picture it looks like there’s ice cream in it? That is soooooooo wrong! Coffee should be hot and black and strong!

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