“How long did it take Sarah to pick her mouth up off the floor when she found out you have kids?”

“Did someone here order two rowdy kids?”

“You don’t know my thirst!”

Better luck next time, Champ.

“That’s your cue, Romeo!”

“Gay panic!”

“I kinda want to try one of those chicken sandwiches…”

“I love scarf weather.”

“I’m so tired of stark white classic movies being attributed to queer and feminist culture…”

“Can I even feel feelings anymore?!”

“Don’t ever fall for a straight woman.”

“Eat my corporate rainbows!”

“Care-free, pain-free plot, with a genuine happily ever after.”

“…is this divine intervention?”

“Look, we all know how the gays feel about their representation…”

“It looks like a museum for straight white women in here.”

“An ally to whomst?”

“You mean to tell me your regimen is dancing through the opening credits of One Day at a Time?”

“I love every square inch of you.”

Class of 19-TooDamnRecent.