I fell in love with my best friend who i knew was a lesbian but didn’t realize i like girls till i fell hard for her. But i never ever thought in a million years she could ever have feelings for me. Until one night after going to see 21 jump street we were laying on her couch, me using her as a pillow which wasnt unusual, and while we both thought the other was asleep we wiggled our hands together slowly till finally she slipped her fingers through mine and we fell asleep like that. It took a couple days for us to get our feelings out, we ended up writing notes to each other in one of my leather bound journals and getting our feelings for each other out that way. Turns out shes had feelings for me a longer time then i had realized i was falling for her. We both have dreams of working in the Navy, which promotes some future problems, but we plan to work around whatever problems they have. With that said We’re both in the JROTC program at our high school and she was elected as CO (commanding officer of the unit) and our instructors found out like a month after we got together and pulled us separately aside and told us no. Because she’s CO im not allowed to be her girlfriend on school campus. Because she cant show favoritism towards me because we’re both officers and because out side it “looks bad for the unit, you know?”. And it totally sucks ass to not be allowed that American high school experance of walking her to class and kissing her god by and hello. Or to be able to walk down the hall holding hands or sit at lunch together.

In my personal opinion, its harder, and hurts more, to be standing next to her and not allowed to even be her friend and show any type of affection to her at all, then to physically be away from her. It’s torture.

But somehow we work it out. After school theres alot of time together at my house to make up for not being able to even hug her at school which takes up most of our time together.

I’m just lucky I fell in love with a wonderful woman who was my best friend first, and it didn’t blow back in my face and ruin our friendship.