Advice

You Can Leave Your Partner Who Scares You

“I’ve been dating this person for four years who is genuinely the light of my life but has some anger management issues. Though they would never, ever turn that anger towards me, it still terrifies me just witnessing it. They are aware of it, but I don’t think they’ll ever go to therapy about it. They don’t really want to even though they acknowledge it’s a problem.”

Politics + Activism

Communities, Not Police, Are Our Best Bet for Ending LGBTQ Domestic Violence

Victims/survivors in general are expected to seek help from law enforcement to escape from abusive relationships, but the police are sometimes the most dangerous and threatening forces in the lives of marginalized folks, even those who have an abusive partner, friend, or relative. For that reason, community support is central to assisting victims and survivors of domestic violence.

First Person

Because If I Was Honest, Everything I Knew Would Explode

“That instinct, to lie or protect the men who abuse us, is hard to explain. It comes from being afraid of the person who is abusing you, of course, but also afraid for the changes that honesty will force. We don’t want to endanger the men who hurt us, because we love them and we don’t think we can live without them… If anything, my identification as a feminist made the idea of disclosing the abuse even more difficult, because I thought it was something I was letting happen to me and it embarrassed me.”

News + Politics Politics + Activism

You’re Free To Travel While Transgender, Protected From Queer Partner Violence

The State and Justice Departments are teaming up to give you kind of a nice Friday – it should now be a lot easier for trans people to get accurate passports, and new guidelines on partner violence are also going to apply to queer relationships. Also, gay Republicans at LA Pride, angry gay Bostonians, the superstar teen sailor is missing, Exodus International wants you to know it’s sorry but you’re still going to hell, and a Jewish/Arab lesbian feminist has some thoughts to share.