Welcome to the latest installment in our series on astrological compatibility for queers! If you haven’t, I’d recommend reading the Moon article first! I will make the same disclaimer here I made in that article, which is to say thatΒ you are a person with agency who has free will and who ultimately has to take responsibility for your life and your choices. Astrology provides you with information, but it in no way governs who you end up with.Β Ultimately, you make your own choices and live your own life and can make a relationship work with good communication. Boom. To find out your Mercury sign along with the rest of your chart, you can use a number of free online resources; I personally recommend astro.com!
So, Mercury! What even is Mercury? you ask. Mythology buffs will recall that Mercury, or Hermes, is the messenger of the gods, which gives you an idea of what this planet rules: ideas, communication, thoughts, self-expression, the written word; how we move through the world when it comes to expressing ourselves with language on a day-to-day basis.
Communication, of course, is the bedrock of any relationship β romantic, sexual, platonic. And yet! Mercury often gets totally overlooked when it comes to synastry, or the astrology of relationships. There are ample resources about the moon (emotions, habits, instincts), Venus (how you woo/like to be wooed), and Mars (fucking and conflict), and obviously those things are super important. But communication (both verbal and non-verbal)! Itβs the nuts and bolts of how relationships are built. When psychological researcher and relationship expert John Gottman talks about βemotional bidsβ as a foundational component of successful relationships, heβs talking about communication. So buckle in, folks; letβs talk about how we process.
Aries Mercury
I am that I am. No one embodies that more than folks with Aries energy, and Mercury in Aries is no exception. What you think and what you say is who you are, is a direct reflection of your character, your identity, your core beliefs. Your thinking is dynamic, sharp, innovative. Youβre the fire-starter of the fire Mercurys: you ignite inspiration wherever you go.
How you process: Talk first, think later. You move quickly. Youβre decisive. You just know, in your gut, how to approach a situation. Trust you gut. You learn through risk, through adventure, and youβre looking for partners who can roll with you.
The communication you crave: Direct honesty. Youβre a no-bullshit straight shooter and you wish that others would be, too. Sometimes this gets interpreted as being challenging or competitive – warrior-like, if you will – but you just say what you mean and mean what you say. You donβt dance around matters of the heart.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Aries, Leo, Sagittarius
Learn something from: Gemini, Libra
Be challenged by: Cancer, Capricorn
TaurusΒ Mercury
You take pride in your word; once given, itβs a promise. Youβre slow to commit to an idea or belief, but once youβre there, itβs hard to change your mind. Stubborn, some call you. Youβre methodical, measured. You take your time. Youβre not charmed by quick wits; you lean back in a leather-bound chair, quiet, thoughtful. You play the long game.
How you process: You do best with concepts that you can put into practice, that you can see and touch and taste, that you can really work through with your hands. You want to work it out for yourself in an environment where you can savor the texture of a word, an idea. (Which is to say, dates should always involve good food.)
The communication you crave: Folks who offer a pragmatic solution theyβve taken the time to think over and tailor to your tastes. Who donβt rush you for a response. Who put some beauty, a touch of Venus, into their efforts.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Capricorn, Taurus, Virgo
Learn something from: Cancer, Scorpio
Be challenged by: Aquarius, Leo
GeminiΒ Mercury
Mercury is at home in Gemini, where it can fly through the air with the greatest of ease. Mercury in Gemini natives are the fast-talking, quick thinking, clever conversationalists who are motivated by curiosity above all else. You appreciate ideas and debate for their own sake, understanding that many things can be true at the same time. You donβt necessarily personally identify with every idea you may hold in a particular moment, like some other signs do. You do best when you find other folks who can meet you on this level β and who can keep up.
How you process: By. Talking. It. Out. You need to talk out your feelings to know what you’re feeling.
The communication you crave: Witty conversationalists whose minds work as quickly as yours. Folks who can fly with you, dancing from topic to topic. Who donβt just get your need for intellectual variety and stimulation, but who share it, and who delight in your ingenuity.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Aquarius, Gemini, Libra
Learn something from: Aries, Sagittarius
Be challenged by: Pisces, Virgo
CancerΒ Mercury
Mercury in Cancer folk, more than any other sign, notice the non-verbals: what is not said aloud. You see below the surface, immediately picking up on the disconnect between peopleβs body language and what theyβre trying to talk themselves into. You ask your people how theyβre doing, how theyβre really doing. Youβre the group mom, the group dad, the caretaker.
How you process: Quietly. Privately. In the shower; in the bathtub. In the safety of your own home or chosen environment, with food, with comfort. You need space and time, but you also need folks who will care for you as you care for them, who show up for you when you call.
The communication you crave: Words and non-verbals that feed your soul. Words as nutrition for the heart. Youβre slow to reveal yourself, but you still take in everything thatβs coming at you. Folks who speak and touch and move with awareness and sensitivity: these are the people with whom you feel most at home.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces
Learn something from: Capricorn, Taurus
Be challenged by: Aries, Libra
LeoΒ Mercury
Youβre the consummate storyteller. Mercury in Leo has a flair for the dramatic; you know not only how to command the room, but also how to direct it β how to shine the light on anyone with something interesting to share. You donβt get enough credit for being one of the best (and loudest) cheerleaders of those you love. Fiercely loyal, you have no problem advocating on othersβ behalf, especially those in your circle who arenβt as comfortable with a microphone as you are.
How you process: Itβs clichΓ© to say with an audience, but: with an audience. You want to be with your trusted folks, who can bear witness to whatβs going on β and who can validate it.
The communication you crave: Directness, delivered with empathy. Youβre an entertainer at your core, but you most value those rare people who can see through your layers and challenge you while still holding space for your vulnerability. These are the people who make your heart sing.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Aries, Leo, Sagittarius
Learn something from: Libra, Aquarius
Be challenged by: Taurus, Scorpio
VirgoΒ Mercury
Mercury is at home in Virgo, where it uses its deft intellect to organize, to master the technicalities of ideas. Your goal is always to simplify, to get to the point. No beating around the bush, no fanciful fluff. You are at your best when bringing projects to life that have a tangible result, where you have the opportunity to be exact and precise in your thinking and execution. Of course, communicating about emotions is not always so precise.
How you process: Compartmentalization. Pro/con lists. Calendars. Writing it all down. Methodically working through. Taking a walk in nature.
The communication you crave: Practical language. This isnβt to say non-emotional language; you just value concrete words and definitions you can wrap your mind around. Also? You want to share a task, to take a walk together, to accomplish something while doing the work of communication.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Capricorn, Taurus, Virgo
Learn something from: Scorpio, Pisces
Be challenged by: Gemini, Sagittarius
LibraΒ Mercury
Mercury in Libra is the diplomat, the keeper of the peace. You can appreciate and embody multiple viewpoints even in the span of one conversation and delight in debate for its own sake. You value fairness and have an even-keeled way of presenting things, even when discussing a topic you care deeply about. However, your mild(er) manners arenβt necessarily indicative of the passion you can tap into.
How you process: Through conversation with others. Talking it out always helps you determine what you think β however, more than any other sign of the zodiac, you value finding the right words, saying it precisely the right way. You want to take othersβ views into account, and you want to communicate your point and minimize friction, but it is vital to remember that you are the leading person of your own life.
The communication you crave: Conversation that promotes harmony and appreciation between those involved. Elegance. Lyric. Beauty.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Aquarius, Gemini, Libra
Learn something from: Aries, Leo
Be challenged by: Cancer, Capricorn
ScorpioΒ Mercury
You donβt have to try to see peopleβs ulterior motives: you just do. Scorpio energy is kin with the underworld, the abject, the mysterious, and in Mercuryβs realm, is adept at ferreting out secrets. This can sometimes bring a touch of paranoia (sometimes, folks really do mean well, but you never quite know what to do with the earnest and good hearted, even when you are one of them). Your humor can be dark, sarcastic, biting. At the end of the day, you just want people to stop putting on airs and be real. Youβre like a surgeon: your language can cut so as to heal.
How you process: You need the space to get away from the constant flood, to allow yourself the time to integrate information. Set up a morning routine that helps to ground you, that offers you a sacred space to return to each day that is just for you, and you alone.
The communication you crave: Deep, intimate connections that easily vacillate between soul-heavy, shared interests, and sharp humor.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces
Learn something from: Capricorn, Taurus
Be challenged by: Aquarius, Leo
SagittariusΒ Mercury
Mercury in Sagittarius is most at home in your library, in your lab. Even when traveling, or on retreat, you are not truly at rest: your mind is soaking up everything around you. You collect words like others collect hobbies and things; you are ever in search of new and better ways to express yourself to those around you. Of all the fire signs, you speak with the most conviction, that what you believe now, in the present moment, is the absolute and unswayed Truth β which, with time, you come to understand is not always the case.
How you process: Through learning β about yourself, about others. Jay-Z, a Mercury in Sagittarius native, said βI’m hungry for knowledge. The whole thing is to learn every day.β
The communication you crave: Like all fire Mercurys, you crave directness, but whereas Mercury in Aries wants directness with blunt honesty and Mercury in Leo wants directness with empathy, you want directness with context: to understand how someone elseβs life experience brought them to where they are. How did they arrive at their Truth? What informs their language and expression? And you, in turn, want to be able to explain yourself to others, want someone who wants to understand your Truth.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Aries, Leo, Sagittarius
Learn something from: Aquarius, Gemini
Be challenged by: Virgo, Pisces
CapricornΒ Mercury
Above all, Mercury in Capricorn natives are deliberate. Efficient, productive, and capable, you understand how to make the most of your ideas: how to translate thought into result, word into action. You consider someoneβs word to be honor binding, and you have little use for frivolity and flirtation that isnβt going anywhere. When you flirt, you flirt with intention. Youβre methodical and no-frills in your approach β and you understand how to get what you want.
How you process: Working on a project. Like Mercury in Virgos, you like your pro/con lists, but you would rather have a shorter list and get shit crossed off. You want to do something about your emotions.
The communication you crave: A cool-headed, concise, precise conversation that clearly communicates needs, wants, and actionable next steps. Clear definitions and action points are paramount. You donβt do mind games.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Capricorn, Taurus, Virgo
Learn something from: Cancer, Scorpio
Be challenged by: Aries, Libra
AquariusΒ Mercury
Mercury in Aquarius folks are less concerned with being charming conversationalists and more concerned with contributing new and worthy ideas to their friend group and society at large β and, on occasion, calling peopleβs bluff. You enjoy challenging encounters that stir the pot: you arenβt as confrontational as the fire signs, but you enjoy digging into the way people think. Where are folksβ unconscious biases? You want to know. Youβre an astute observer of peopleβs thought processes, and the fact that youβre usually a few steps ahead of the conversation helps you steer the course.
How you process: First: solitude. Research, journaling. Getting your ducks in a row. Talking it out comes after youβve organized your thoughts.
The communication you crave: In all things, you are committed to progress: to intellectual progress, to social movement, to personal evolution. You want relationships that are grounded in purpose and to be with people who see beneath Aquarian detachment to the vulnerable heart at your core.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Aquarius, Gemini, Libra
Learn something from: Leo, Sagittarius
Be challenged by: Taurus, Scorpio
PiscesΒ Mercury
Youβre an associative thinker who delights in dreams, the subconscious, and the intangible. More than any other Mercury sign, you take in all the information in your environment: non-verbal cues, the music thatβs playing, the energy of the people around you. You know that words are only part of the picture. Mind, you can be a warm and thoughtful conversationalist, and youβre also a good listener, but sometimes have to quietly withdraw from the world altogether, which people donβt always understand. Introspection and contemplation are keywords for your communication style.
How you process: Baths, showers, and springwater soaks can help clear your mind, but how you synthesize this information is a challenge. Sleep, and let your subconscious do the connective work. Read poetry, listen to beautiful music.
The communication you crave: Heart-led, empathetic demonstrations of love. Tender energy matters more than precise language.
Compatibility
On your wavelength: Cancer, Pisces, Scorpio
Learn something from: Taurus, Virgo
Be challenged by: Gemini, Sagittarius
Here’s How to Do It Yourself!
There are many places you can go, but to do your own chart, go toΒ astro.com. To get the most accurate chart, you need your exact time of birth in addition to your date and place of birth; however, you can still do a chart without a time of birth.
If youβre an app person, I would recommendΒ Time Passages, which provides an incredibly detailed breakdown breakdown of your chart with daily horoscopes as well as your transits and progressions (this will make sense to the more advanced astrology folk among you). It also gives you the opportunity to save other peopleβs charts
If youβre interested in starting to research and learn more so that you can interpret your chart for yourself, start withΒ The Only Astrology Book Youβll Ever NeedΒ (which is not, in fact, the only book youβll ever need, but is a great starting point). Thereβs also a wealth of excellent free content by queer practitioners on the internet, likeΒ Chani Nicholasβ horoscopes and courses as well as the queer-centric astrology content at Beth MaidenβsΒ Little Red Tarot. Go forth and learn!
I like this series but it’s hardly something that you can ask on a first date :D
Oh, I definitely do people’s charts right in front of them on first dates. :)
How often do the people you date know their time of birth without having to look it up? I’ve no idea what time I was born, & didn’t think this ignorance was unusual!
“How you process: Compartmentalization. Pro/con lists. Calendars. Writing it all down. Methodically working through. Taking a walk in nature.”
Just lay out all my coping mechanisms for everyone, why don’t you
This is so interesting
Maybe a dumb question but is the compatibility with other Mercury signs or with Sun signs?
For other Mercury signs!
every now and then an astrology thing actually lines up with how i actually am as a person. the MERCURY IN LIBRA thing MAKES SENSE, thank you
YAY I love when things make sense and are helpful xx
Gemini are often described as mercurial… even so, having that exact combination in my chart, and the breakdown, lines up way too well?
Wow, I’m mecury in scorpio and literally every single word of it feels true. My morning routine is basically my favorite part of the day!! and space is amazing!
ooooo i am actually getting so into this! (mercury in pisces here, how did you know about my emotional-processing swim-sessions)
you are brilliant and i love this series ? off to download time passages so i can stop asking you ridiculous questions xoxo
I’m getting more into astrology right now so this series is really wonderful for me! also the graphics are so good!!