It’s that tie-straightening and sunglass removal feeling.

“I just don’t see why a woman would want to aspire to masculinity when she doesn’t like men.”

“So what do you do in bed, then?” they always ask, but what they mean is “I think I already know what you do in bed because you’re a butch who likes femmes, so I’ve made assumptions on your behalf.”

On growing up with (or without) guns.

On our first day, the Professor stepped onto the floor of the auditorium and said, “Raise your hand if you had sex last night!”

“Coming out never ends, and for some of you it hasn’t even begun.”

“I called it sexual assault at first. Sexual assault seemed less damning, less permanent.”

Once upon a time I married a man, had kids, and realized I was a lesbian. Here’s what happened and what I wish somebody had told me at the time.