“everyone act medium”

“what if autostraddle just became a mariah carey fansite”

“no one gives you a free personal pan pizza when you do something you really, really don’t want to do! we live in a crumbling society”

“i don’t care about this at all except i would like to request hot pictures of the lesbians involved for a feature”

“We were just kissing ON THE MOUTH and you wanna know if we are SISTERS?!”

“ANYWAY YEAH come get a scorpion!”