“omg wtf there are so many good looking butches in that one city in maine
is there a colony?”

NOT TWEE NORDIC LESBIANS

“When I send my Macbook out to sea, do you think I should say “Go with God, Crispy” like Maggie Smith does in “Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit,” or “Boom, Mr. Longbottom!” like Maggie Smith does in “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2″?”

“I would give anything to see Rachel start a discussion with a writer that begins with ‘Can I be frank'”

“i’m stepping down from autostraddle
bye
you’ll miss calling me out when i give my body to the sea so”

“Do you think Putin is upset that we did not include “Vladimir” in this list? It is a pretty lesbian name.”

“Drink with nerds and feel good about people calling you mom.”

Our number one feeling is always Alex Vega.

“Today in the bisexual celebrities beat, I have fucking died”

“I hope you gave birth to a swan, invented a new way to eat pineapples, started recycling or used a cucumber as a dildo after your dog ate your dildo. I hope only good things for you.”

“it’s amazing how much more grownup writing a column on the internet makes you seem.”

“I will probably be Connie Britton Editor from now on. Also heading up our Star Witness Akita division.”

“I made dinner and our entire website fell apart”

“I DID get hit on by a man at a lesbian bar on Saturday night. It made me feel very free and also like a pastry.”

“In other, lighter news I want to share with everyone that there is a segment of a hot dog on the section of our roof that we can see from the bedroom window.”

“It was like throwing a tennis ball at a wall and expecting it to bounce back but against all odds it gets stuck in the bricks.”

It would be like Rachel’s “Helping you Help Yourself,” but with more of a Stef vibe and maybe just a series of gifs or images with captions that get right to the heart of the matter. Like “DON’T GO TO WORK LATE, ASSHOLE.”

“I asked Riese if she thought I would ever have sex again if I started wearing kaftans from World Market and she said no.”

“Four dollars and a Chipotle gift card to the person who can tell us the name of the vegan Ireland Baldwin met!”

“I’m just imagining Alex on a rock wall and Rachel snuggling a cat or something.”