Derek comes back and is worse than a leech trapped in your face.

Leanne’s Amish roots come to light as she hammers out the tenants of Normaism, a rabbi arrives to test Jewish Black Cindy and the others about their newfound Jewish faith, and Suzanne’s legion of admirers grows.

THIS IS MY LAST GLEE RECAP EVER!!!! GET IN HERE.

Everybody’s going to jail!

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, and now it’s over.

Emily meets her girlfriend’s husband, and Hanna dances like she’s possessed by the Holy Ghost.

The kids all leave the house for one night, so Stef and Lena get down to the serious business of drinking wine and scissoring.

Only one more week before the Big A reveal!

Emily comes unspooled in the most flawless way possible, and with empanadas.

Jane Lynch gets her sendoff and it is cuckoo bananapants.

This show is just Sue’s Sylvester’s Faustian fever dream now.

Where Brittney Griner and Glory Johnson become our favorite lesbian couple and we all get married. You’re going to need some tissues for this one. Or a blow horn.

The pAtriArchy is A, just as we suspected.

Brittany and Santana say “I do.” (And Kurt and Blaine do too.)

Brittany and Santana are going to the chapel, y’all. They’re gonna get married!

Stef and Lena agree to let Callie go, and Rosie’s got a brand new house.

Supernatural kills Charlie, Gotham tropes Barbara, Arrow marries Nyssa off to a man. But on the upside, Samira Wiley crushed it on Law & Order: SVU and Raven was amazing on Black-ish.

Jude and Connor come out, and Monty finally stops keeping her lips to herself.

It’s the season finale of Orange is the New Black, and so much shit is about to go down. Ride with me.

Everyone visits Ali in jail to apologize for getting her arrested for a murder she didn’t commit. And Emily effin’ dances.