It’s Shane’s fortieth birthday and Generation Q’s gift to you is a few pictures of Dana, a really REALLY hot sex scene and a cameo by Robin Roemer!

If you forget the whole child-rape-flashback thing, the Papa Porter dying thing, the Helena-wasting-time-Tina-could-be-with-Bette thing, the paper-dolls/Baruch Atah LaLa Hoolehay Heeyhoooo thing, the Marc pantsing himself thing (when he really should just write “fuck me” on his chest) and the Jenny/Random Elder thing, Loud and Proud is one of the series’ best episodes. Let me rephrase this: if “The L Word” was “The Dana & Alice Show,” Loud and Proud would be one of THAT show’s best episodes.

Just fyi, no one wants to look like they’re moving furniture when they’re fucking. In other news, Adele is creepily turning into Jenny and Phyllis’s daughter is a babe.

When in doubt, dance. Dance, I say! Dance! Dance all over the stage, change your clothes, tear up the floor, waltz and tango and skip and mambo your smokin’ hot bod down to the village square, hook up with the Pied Piper of WeHo and dance your way out of regularly scheduled programming into the idea well of death.

Why are there twice as many lesbian squabbles as lesbian sexy moments in this show? Oh yeah, it’s because this is the way that we liveeeeeeeee. This is the one where Ilene reminds us all that men are disgusting, loathsome creatures by making henry cut his toenails.

It’s almost Valentine’s Day and Riese is sending out all her love. Luckily there’s lots to love in this episode with everyone looking very Shane today, the lesbian phone tree, Tasha being generally adorable, and of course: Angela Robinson.

Talk about NOT ending with a bang. Really IFC, it’s one thing to weigh down your show’s sixth season with an endless parade of unnecessary melodramatic plot devices — a murder, a pregnant man, a stolen film, a botched adoption from homophobic out-of-towners, two out-of-the-blue love triangles — and quite another thing to, when the season ends, not even “use” these devices to infuse the series finale with aforementioned melodrama.

Better is riding a tractor, Jenny is riding a raft, and Paige is riding Shane in the ’50s. Shining moments include scenes with the Lynch [who can do no wrong] and Dana Fairbanks [may she rest in peace].

Xena the warrior princess shows up for another round of adoration from her number one fans: the lesbians. Also, shocker: Jenny DIED.

Oh look! A special visit from The Ditty Bops! In this installment of our favorite saga, Alice says “what the frickin’ frack?!,” Max stlll has an unfortunately soulpatch, and Alice and Shane make us remember why vandalism can be fun.

In a countdown of the best scenes of season four, we start with Jenny calling Stacey Merkin a vagina wig and take a break with the basketball game at number six. Scenes one through five are coming atcha soon.

Good news: on a scale of one to ten, this episode was “not bad!” There was a surprising amount of sex from miss i-never-give-the-girls-what-they-want chaiken, it was directed by Jamie Babbit, Foxy Brown came to the jailhouse, and Inconceivable showed up from ‘The Princess Bride.’

The last 20 minutes were some of the best I’ve seen on this show. It was fun and quality and featured all those verbs they sing about in that opening song we all cream over. Um, fighting, winning, fucking, whatevs. Up until that? Blah blah podcasts blah love cindy blah. You get the picture.

Cut. Print. Adele is getting creep-city but we don’t care. There are court cases to be won and lesbian Turkish oil wrestling to be done.

Episode 606 of The L Word, titled “Lactose Intolerant,” is the worst thing I’ve seen on television since Episode 604 of The L Word. Howevs; whereas 604 was calmly terrible — bumbling softly along its housework-heavy path of mediocrity — 606 was outrageously, actively, aggressively terrible.

Someone just let Angelica honk the horn. already because shit is going DOWN in the season finale. Phyllis, Jodi, and Adele want it their way and Shane’s fucking [it all up] again but at least Helena and her money are here to save The Planet. Because where would be be without The Planet?

See the joy and the laughter! At “LMFAO”’s end, Tasha’s proud of Alice, Bette & Tina are in love 4evs, Kit & Helena have successfully turned Hit Club into “Casablanca meets Studio Fifty-Fouh” (that’s my best transliteration of Kit’s pronunciation of “4″), Shane & Jenny are in the giggly charged-up first moments of what they still believe is Real Love and everyone is dancing and/or laughing! AND SCENE!!

If Paige and Shane have already done the time then they might as well do the crime you know what I mean ladies?

Things that suck: when you and your girlfriend accidentally wear the same outfit, when everyone has PMS, trying to break up with a girlfriend who refuses to be broken up with, getting blackmailed, meeting a cute girl when you already have a perfectly nice girlfriend, etc. It’s all right here, girls.

Despite the fact that angus is a lying low-down nanny-fucking motherfucker, GIRLS ACTUALLY HAVE SEX THIS EPISODE. Even Kit and Papi. Ew, we know.