A symbolical analysis of the Taylor Swift canon (w/infographic). Is there art without sex? Love without raincoats? Feminism without girls? Beauty without dirt? Copycats without claws?

Portia De Rossi goes on The View, graces the universe with her radiant beauty & intelligence on topics like being closeted, her career, and equal rights. Elisabeth Hasselbeck is dumb. Kids are more tolerant of diversity, some important dude thinks women will be in the NBA one day, and the best protest signs of 2009.

It’s the very last day! And Blackenhorn continues to dig his own grave; defending polygamy and generally being a petulant h8er: “I feel like there must be some secret clause in legal proceedings that when someone says something this f*cking stupid, they automatically forfeit the case for their team. Like losing the Snitch. The polygamous Snitch.”

Autostraddle stops talking about Tila and talks to her instead: “Hopefully, after people read this interview, it will change their minds about me. But if not, it doesn’t matter. I’m still happy. I’m still going to fight for our right to get married. I’m going to buy my Teletubbies pajamas, and throw pickles at paparazzi!”

Good Morning America! Adam Lambert will not be performing his hot hot sex for you today because he is too controversial. #shameonyouabc! Here’s why this mistake isn’t embarrassing for Adam, but totally shameful for ABC.

Lindsay Lohan will be home for Thanksgiving … and then she’ll be doing a Terry Richardson PURPLE Mag photoshoot with alleged sex scenes. Also; Candy Slice’s Lady Gaga/Beyonce parody, Fame Monster on VH1, Glee on hiatus, Adam Lambert on Letterman, CBS apologizes for Early Show kissing double standard, and we wonder why Chris Brown is booked for GMA and Adam was kicked off.

If you need an excuse to read comic books, looking at the sexy ladies of the X-Men clad in their skintight asskicking outfits is a great place to start. Meet the hottest member of the X-Men, one of the coolest and sometimes the most batshit-crazy: Jean Grey! Also known as the Phoenix. Also known as Famke Janssen. Also just plain smokin’ hot. There are a lot of sexy X-Ladies, but she’s my numero uno, and here’s why.

Adam Lambert is axed from two more ABC shows, and hello double standard! We’ve got some ’04 Pink Billboard Music Awards footage that’ll blow yr mind. Lady Gaga was nominated for 5 Grammy Awards (and Dave Matthews had an album apparently?), Idina Menzel wants to be Lea’s Mom on Glee (CASTING HEAVEN), Adam Lambert wants his super gay & campy song to be in Twilight: Eclipse, and John Mayer plays lesbian matchmaker for Lilo & SamRon.

The American Family Association is being such a stage mom to Jesus and was boycotting the Gap for not using the word “Christmas” — we’ll tell you why that boycott is now on hold. Also, it’s boom time for unpaid interns, is Glee anti-Christian?, Sarah Palin gets PUNK’D, JCrew is weird and Australian senator compares homosexuality to incest. Again. Sigh.

Caught up in the last-minute holiday gift panic? We’re here to tell you about some of the more gift-able music CDs and DVDs on the shelves right now, and the sort of stockings they’re made for. From Madonna and Michael Bublé to Little Boots and Sara Quin’s Macbeths, there’s something for every lady in your life.

Game over, Lady Gaga wins, last night’s American Music Awards revealed with her performances of Speechless and Bad Romance. Also: Adam Lambert confirms that this is the Year of the Gays. Also; event photos including Adam Lambert, Alicia Keys, Selena Gomez, Kelly Clarkson and more.

It’s been a crazy week — T.J.L.I.F. (Thank Jane Lynch It’s Friday!) What better way to relax than to cozy up to some Autostraddler comments?

Autostraddle Gaga-Expert Stef and our designer/Gaga-Lover Alex break down “The Fame Monster” track-by-track, including full songs for your listening enjoyment!

Lesbian Cowgirls, Muffy the Vampire Slayer, Orgasm Day, Working in a Porn Store, Her Weirdest Time, Waxing and p.s. Overweight & Underweight Ladies Take More Sexual Risks. Also let’s join the Australian Sex Party! Hot photos though.

Dockers wants men to rediscover manliness and “wear the pants.” We would prefer a pantsless revolution. We got a mini-roundtable together to discuss advertising’s attempt to revive khakis, manhood, and the Dockers brand all at once.

Guess what, another decade is over! Here’s a retrospective on the best of times and worst of times in the 00’s for the queers.

This week on Glee people draw mustaches on photos, Will finally realizes his own wife isn’t now — nor has ever been — pregnant, and Carlytron finally manages to enjoy this show again.

Autstraddle Senior Design Director Alex explains why Adam Lambert’s album cover can only mean one thing: We Love the 80s. Also, Lady Gaga’ track-by-track, Lilith Fair 2010, and new documentary “Starsuckers” and a lesbian character on White Collar.

Out lesbian actresses Jill Bennett & Cathy DeBuono speak out for the first time on leaving AfterEllen, mainstream fame in Hollywood, the story behind popular rumors, avoiding the lesbian urge to merge and being big fish in the small “celesbian” pond.

Carlytron compiles an EPIC 2009 television wrap-up wherein she gives absurd awards to your favorite shows and characters.