NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday Is Guilty As Charged

Welcome to NSFW Sunday!

+ Regardless of age, gender, relationship status or anything else, Valentine’s Day is the worst for everyone. Say you wanted to wear lingerie for someone, though, here’s how to do it:

“I really hate it when an article about lingerie focuses only on how your partner would feel looking at you in said bra or panties. Firstly, not everyone actually finds lingerie attractive, so don’t just assume that if you’re doing it for them, your partner will respond as well as you’d hope. Secondly if you’re lingerie only for your partner’s approval or because they are really pushing for it, how much will you really be getting out of it? So ask yourself: How does lingerie make me feel? Will it make it me feel beautiful and powerful or will I just feel uncomfortable?”

Related: why compulsory femininity is the worst, and the history of the nylon slip.

+ Sexperts Em & Lo have a Valentine’s Day Issue up on their site chock-full of sexy delights. It’s heteronormative, obvs, but there are still things like extensive rundowns of the best rom-coms ever, Valentine’s Day Cards that don’t suck and 10 Ways to Be More Romantic.

+ Good Vibes recently acquired a booklet from the Arnold Massage Vibrator Company circa 1914. According to its contents, the “list of ailments which can be successfully treated by Vibratory Massage” includes:

  • Aches and pains
  • Angular Features
  • Asthma
  • Backache
  • Baldness
  • Beauty
  • Biliousness
  • Bladder Troubles
  • Bowel Troubles
  • Colds
  • Consumption
  • Coughs
  • Cramps
  • Cramps — Writers’
  • Crick in the Back
  • Dandruff
  • Deafness
  • Double Chin
  • Eye Troubles
  • Gout
  • Headache
  • Heart Trouble
  • Liver Troubles
  • Pneumonia
  • Sleeplessness
  • Tonsilitis

+ The greatest science fiction porn movies from 1992 to 2001 include Zena: Mistress of the Universe, which features an alien lesbian dominatrix who comes to earth “from across the galaxy in search of the earth’s most beautiful women”; Girl Explores Girl: The Alien Encounter, which allegedly touches on issues of coming out and self-acceptance; and classic(ly hilarious) titles such as Cyberella: Forbidden Passions, A Clockwork Orgy and Alien Sex Files.

+ Though “breaking: women now watch porn!” trend pieces are infuriating on several levels, they might indicate a shift in the public view of female sexuality:

“While it’s all very well to announce that more women are watching porn, what’s more interesting is the hope that the historically conservative view of female sexuality is becoming more expansive and less judgmental. So much so that one day those articles won’t even need to be written.”

+ People in monogamous relationships are as satisfied as people in consensually non-monogamous relationships, according to a recent study in the Personality and Social Psychology Review. The study dealt with gay men, but here’s what it found:

“Men reported that their open relationships accommodated their intimacy needs as well as their desires for sexual diversity. Moreover, the men in these partnerships often felt more intimate with their partner when they agreed to be non-monogamous. Just as monogamy can provide a sense of support and protection, consensual non-monogamy can provide the emotional support of a primary partnership while also allowing exploration of other sexual relationships.”

+ According to the 2012 Sexual Health Rankings survey, Vermont ranks #1 in sexual health according to 26 indicators, which include same-sex marriage status, status of laws that address orientation or gender identity-related hate crimes, insurance coverage of abortion, the number of seats in state legislatures held by women, and a lot of other factors:

“In our federal system of government, individual states have powers to control conditions that affect sexual health. Differences in state laws, health systems, and social and economic conditions can produce variation in the overall sexual health of state populations. National policies and programs aimed at improving sexual health should account for variation across states. Comparing states by ranking them highlights each state’s strengths and challenges, and suggests opportunities for action.”

Meanwhile, Connecticut ranked second, New York ranked 14th, California ranked 26th and Mississippi came in last.

whitney-sara

+ On February 20th, queer porn star Jiz Lee, feminist and author Carol Queen and other sex positive folks will be reading at Pegasus Books in Berkeley, California (2349 Shattuck Ave.) for “Lyrics & Dirges: 50 Shades of Rainbow.”

+ This week on Autostraddle.com, Ali gives good advice on how to select and employ your first strap-on. If you have a sexy question, you shoud email ali [at] autostraddle dot com.

+ Looking for sexy Valentine’s Day Gifts? We have Ten Lesbosexy Valentine’s Day Things For Weirdos,  the Sexiest Holiday Gift Guide Ever, a Strap-On & NSFW Shopping Guide and the Last-Minute NSFW Valentine’s Day Shopping Guide. Look out for another Valentine’s Day situation from us shortly!

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Ryan Yates

Ryan Yates was the NSFW Editor (2013–2018) and Literary Editor for Autostraddle.com, with bylines in Nylon, Refinery29, The Toast, Bitch, The Daily Beast, Jezebel, and elsewhere. They live in Los Angeles and also on twitter and instagram.

Ryan has written 1142 articles for us.

14 Comments

  1. If using a vibrator can make you more beautiful, I should be expecting a call from a modelling agent soon, amirite?

  2. … wait, having ‘Angular Features is an ailment?

    really though if using a vibrator could change your face i think that would probs be the kiss of death for the plastic surgery industry.

  3. Aha!

    Valentine’s day won’t suck for me because I am in a relationship, but not married!

    (the loophole in that SF weekly article)

  4. I’m loving the quote about underwear. I wanted to do a Friday Sex Talk on it but only you know what you feel comfortable in. It’s not your partners slash fuck buddy’s choice on what you wear. And you know what makes you feel sexy too. I’m looking forward to the valentines for weirdos post :) I will be spending this years valentines having a party with my friends Ben And Jerry I think..

  5. I’ve got a bit of a cold coming on and that could lead to tonsilitis, but thanks to AS I now know that I can cure that with vibratory massage!

    Hooray for knowledge!

Comments are closed.