NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday Would Go Down On You In A Theatre

feature image via queeringfeministreality.tumblr.com


Welcome to NSFW Sunday!

The Canadian women's rugby team, you're welcome.

The Canadian women’s rugby team, you’re welcome.

+ In Psychology Today, speculation about whether lesbians are less or more into casual sex compared to straight women:

“The percentage of women whose most recent sexual experience was with a casual acquaintance or a close but nonexclusive partner was almost identical for hetero and non-hetero women: 14% vs. 15%. (Granted, non-hetero in this study combined bisexual, lesbian, and questioning women, but it’s the only data of this kind we have.)

All in all, although sexual orientation matters for some aspects of female sexual psychology, casual sex is not one of them. Lesbians desire, approve of, and engage in hookups just as much (or as little) as heterosexual women do. Not more, not less.”

Dali Suicide via n0cturnal

Dali Suicide via n0cturnal

+ The history of the dental dam involves a lot of unpopularity and principle over practice:

“According to some, dental dams do serve a clear purpose, albeit one more symbolic than practical: they give queer women something of their own in a world that tends to dismiss their sexual health. All too often, says ACON coordinator Constable, services aren’t adequately informed to deal with lesbian sexual health, “or lesbians in general.” They might not use it, but the dental dam remains a product they can point to and feel acknowledged. As Constable puts it, “it’s about wanting to be reassured that we are worth something.””

+ There is legitimately going to be a book about pooping and relationships and dating and such:

“Call me naïve, but I guess I just really thought everyone involved in a date at the very beginning would poo first or wait it out. Or do the other thing: Say you have to go to the bathroom and then go find one. I realize you can’t always do that AT FIRST. I’m not saying it would never be embarrassing. Just that it’s probably so rare that you’re unlikely to deal with this a lot. Later on when you’re hanging out and you’re deeper into levels of intimacy, it’d be fine, right, or you could navigate that? It’s just four weeks of dodging the deed ’til you’re in the clear.

Wrong. The authors claim very facetiously that after five years of research, they determined that 97.8 percent of ALL breakups are because of mistimed poop. (Is this a straw poop man?)”

+ Five percent of people surveyed go on Facebook during sex. Relatedly, five percent of people surveyed are doing it wrong.

+ How to kiss, in 1939.

+ How to submit (in a BDSM context): a beginner’s guide.

+ Some additional ways to leave your lover.

+ Erica Greco shared her coming out story at Oh Joy Sex Toy.

face-turned-away

+ More and more people are sharing their porn lives on the internets.

+ People between ages 15 and 44 are having less sex than people in that age range in previous decades, and some argue technology is to blame.

Rio Karina by Vivian Gold in Beautifully Undressed via the Lingerie Addict

Rio Karina by Vivian Gold in Beautifully Undressed via the Lingerie Addict

+ Make-up and break-up sex can be fun because of arousal transfer and the element of risk:

“The high arousal state associated with the fight is transferred to a high arousal state during the make-up sex. The fantastic sex that ensues is to some extent due to the change in mood and the (at least temporary) relief at reconciliation with the partner, but it is also the result of arousal transfer from the fight to the sex. Make-up sex takes place after an unpleasant, heated fight with the partner that has created a gulf between the two and threatened the very existence of the relationship; make-up sex then re-establishes their bond in a very tangible manner.”

+ Words that translate to “pre-fun,” “grief bacon” and what you call someone who has had sex with someone you’ve already had sex with don’t exist in English but should.

+ While words that mean or refer to “having attractive buttocks,” dildos or doggy-style sex do exist in English and should be used more.

+ And Urban Dictionary offers such heart-warming terminology as “booty grazing,” “ninja sex” and “masternap.”

+ How do you have good sex? You actually talk about it:

“Dating apps like OkCupid show you your sexual match percentage with a potential date and you can search for people based on personality traits like “kinkiness”, “aggressiveness” and “sex experience” to see if they’re your style. But if you meet your partner IRL, the conversation needs to be more organic. A study by Assistant Professor Elizabeth Babin at Cleveland State University in Ohio found that “apprehension in talking about sex can spoil one’s sexual enjoyment, with that anxiety linked both to less communication in bed and less satisfaction overall. Unsurprisingly, less sexual communication apprehension and higher sexual self-esteem were both associated with more communication” about sex.”


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Ryan Yates

Ryan Yates was the NSFW Editor (2013–2018) and Literary Editor for Autostraddle.com, with bylines in Nylon, Refinery29, The Toast, Bitch, The Daily Beast, Jezebel, and elsewhere. They live in Los Angeles and also on twitter and instagram.

Ryan has written 1142 articles for us.

29 Comments

  1. Not gonna lie, I’m just here for the pictures. I’m not seeing anyone right now and I’m way too clingy for casual sex so…yay pretty ladies

  2. I can’t believe I spent like 20 minutes heading about people’s pooping behaviour.

  3. Why is someone on a phone and/or tablet during sex? Shouldn’t bedroom activities be sacred or something?

    • They’re obviously doing sex completely wrong. Tbh with the number of girls who’ve told me “you know, you’re the first person I ever actually got off with” i’m not that surprised.

  4. That Swedish word about “people who have had sex with someone you have previously had sex with” has actually changed a bit – the one they’ve marked means literally “belly brother-in-law”. Now we usually just say “buksyskon”, which means “belly sibling”. Much simpler ;) And surprisingly useful…

  5. I spend a lot of time looking at the local rugby team, but I might have to move on to bigger and better and more Canadian things.

  6. …97.8 percent of ALL breakups are because of mistimed poop.

    whAT IS HApepNTINGH????!!!!????????? WHAT?? WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT????????????? Helop me

      • ASDFGHJKL;LKTRFDCFBHKTFRGHJK,MNHFDXCVBNM IUDFGURGFWWGHHSGDFV

        (i just. don’t. understand. i mean, when you gotta go, you gotta go??????????????????????)

        • I don’t see how that has ANYTHING to do with relationships… Geez. O.o that theory is ridiculous. Lol

  7. According to some, dental dams do serve a clear purpose, albeit one more symbolic than practical: they give queer women something of their own in a world that tends to dismiss their sexual health. All too often, says ACON coordinator Constable, services aren’t adequately informed to deal with lesbian sexual health, “or lesbians in general.” They might not use it, but the dental dam remains a product they can point to and feel acknowledged. As Constable puts it, “it’s about wanting to be reassured that we are worth something.”

    What about fisting gloves? Are they too practical to have symbolic import? Like with Goldilocks . . .

  8. As a former rugby player I would say i’d be happy to put the kit back on and be tackled by or scrum down with those ladies…any time.

    • What a sport! I can’t even tell where the rugby jargon ends and the overtly sexual material begins.

      • I can tell that there’s a safer sex joke just waiting to be made here, but, because of my high school’s abstinence-only rugby education, I’m totally unequipped to make it.

        • Even if you do put the kit back on, I’m guessing you’ll want to leave the mouth guard out.

          Kit or no kit, though, you should still wear a scrum cap for protection: countless, doubtless, are the women who’ve gotten cauliflower ear from giving one of them head bareheaded!

  9. I don’t know about whether straight women or queer women have more causal sex. But being in the unusual position of being genderqueer enough both straight and queer women are attracted enough to get down with me I will say the queer girls are better at it, they’re better at communication what they want (probably had more practice?) and there’s a lot more understanding of aftercare and how to part ways so you won’t get that awful post fling mood crash – it’s not always the case but I feel a lot of a lot more comfortable being a bit subby, which is something I need to really enjoy it. The difference is dramatic enough that these days I almost always turn down the straight ones however hot they are.

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