NSFW Lesbosexy Sunday Is Reliable With The Ladies

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Welcome to NSFW Sunday! You should try something new in bed today.

+ “[M]etaphor is how humans tend to talk about fucking,” writes Chelsea G. Summers at Hazlitt:

“More often than not, we turn to slang, metaphor’s kissing cousin. We don’t have sexual intercourse—we ‘get busy,’ ‘hit it,’ ‘do the nasty,’ ‘get some,’ ‘ core,’ and perform countless other acts that we refer to by adorable, horrifying, and illuminating turns of phrase. You don’t have to do much linguistic Sherlocking to decode the figurative language lurking behind ‘horizontal mambo’ or ‘booty call,’ but while people have always talked about sex euphemistically, the terms we use are rarely static. Let me put it this way: if you told your bae your wick was lit and you wanted to play at rumpscuttle and clapperdepouch, she would be in the dark. You tell her you’re turned on and want a nooner, and she can make an informed decision. The names we can call sex are infinite, and they tend to say more about us and our culture than convey anything in particular about the limited ways bodies can fit together. “

+ Kink was classified as a mental illness in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders until as recently as 2013. At the Atlantic, Merissa Nathan Gerson has the story of how things changed:

“The new definitions marked a distinction between behavior—for example, playing rough—and actual pathology. Consenting adults were no longer deemed mentally ill for choosing sexual behavior outside the mainstream.

The change was the result of a massive effort from the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF), an advocacy group founded in 1997 “to advance the rights of and advocate for consenting adults in the BDSM-Leather-Fetish, Swing, and Polyamory Communities.” At the time, these types of sexual behavior, by virtue of their inclusion in the DSM, were considered markers of mental illness—and, as a result, were heavily stigmatized, often with legal repercussions.”

Miki Hamino by Hana Haley for Alexandre Anissa

Miki Hamino by Hana Haley for Alexandre Anissa

+ Laws that regulate sex workers often ignore sex workers themselves.

+ At Oh Joy Sex Toy, Erika Moen reviewed the Eva, a hands-free vibrator she describes as “a lapel pin for your labia.”

+ Love Non Orgasmically: She’s Not Coming But We’re Still Here:

I want to hold on to something of this. This time in our lives. To being open-hearted little queers learning each others bodies. I don’t ever want to become complacent in our knowledge of each other – I want it to always feel like the first time we touched, like we’re still trying our very best. Still exploring every mole. That even when things are difficult, they can still be amazing and fulfilling. That I don’t always need to run from what is hard in life. That we can still tell each other what we want. And it never becomes about the finish line.

by-viktor-hanacek-via-picjumbo.com

viktor hanacek via picjumbo

+ The Eiffle 69 is this year’s sex position hot shit, come on grab your friends.

+ American sex ed is the worst.

+ There is no such thing as normal genitals or a normal sex life.

+ Creatrix Tiara on The Future Sex Studio at RMIT in Melbourne, Australia, where Industrial Designer and Ph.D. Judith Glover works with students to create innovative sex toys.

+ Could physical therapy improve your sex life? If you currently have sexual pain, menstrual pain or problems with bowel/bladder control then actually maybe yes:

“[B]asically if it is happening below the belt, the pelvic floor may be involved.” Even though your initial instinct might be to see your OB/GYN or a urologist, many MDs don’t have enough training to deal with the complexities of the pelvic floor. This is particularly true when it comes to sexual pain and performance issues. I’ve worked with a number of clients who were told by their doctors to ‘try to relax,’ ‘have a glass of wine’ or ‘take an Advil.’ Since pelvic physical therapists focus specifically on these muscles, many of them have much more training, experience, and sensitivity.”

+ Another article by Creatrix Tiara, this one on Medium, applying the Willingness to Pay concept to one’s willingness to pay for porn, and how society’s de-valuing of sex workers is what drives the WTP to “zero.”

To raise our WTP for anything, we need to recognize and appreciate the value of the product or service in consideration. To raise our WTP for porn, we need to recognize sex work, as well as creative work, Internet work, and the work of marginalized people, as work with value.

+ From the Autostraddle Lesbian Sex Archives: these vintage vibrators will make you glad to live in the present:

“Had a symptom no one could classify? Just sort of bitchy today? Hysteria! As Rachel Maines writes in The Technology of Orgasm, “This purported disease and its sister ailments displayed a symptomatology consistent with the normal functioning of female sexuality, for which relief, not surprisingly, was obtained through orgasm.” Maines argues that Western physicians from the first century up until the 1920s often included massaging female patients to orgasm in standard medical practice, as a result of a culture that damned female masturbation and centred sexuality around men. Vibrators were a great way for physicians to be more efficient.”

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Ryan Yates

Ryan Yates was the NSFW Editor (2013–2018) and Literary Editor for Autostraddle.com, with bylines in Nylon, Refinery29, The Toast, Bitch, The Daily Beast, Jezebel, and elsewhere. They live in Los Angeles and also on twitter and instagram.

Ryan has written 1142 articles for us.

9 Comments

  1. “The 69ing people are very busy being both penetrated and orally pleasured, but they can also high-five if they want” This is the inclusive language we need.

  2. There are multiple rules of safety telling me why I should not want to tie a person up in live holiday lights, but gosh do I want to ignore them.

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