Welcome back to No Filter, your important political content for a Wednesday afternoon. Each week we wander the forests of Instagram, shaking the tree of queer celebrity social media and catching whatever wonderful, weird content falls out. This analogy is terrible! Here are some pictures of beautiful people living lives that are far more interesting than mine:
Let’s start out strong by celebrating this beautiful union of Danielle Brooks and Missy Elliott.
Behold, Lauren Jauregui amongst the foliage.
Annie Clark is out here lookin’ like an impossibly hip weirdo spy who choppered her way into her pilates class.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BeZIBZdjllq/?taken-by=emmaportner
I always watch these videos of Emma Portner dancing and think, “Oh, this looks simple enough; I could do that if I wanted to,” and then instead of even attempting it, I eat more snacks in my desk chair. I’m gonna come clean with you, there’s no way in hell I could actually do this.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BehPr1inM87/?taken-by=kehlani
There were a lot of Kehlani posts to choose from this week but I went with this one where she has the sweetest message and looks the absolute most like she is definitely your girlfriend.
I can’t wait to finally meet Jen Richards at A-Camp so I can ask her in person to post on Instagram more often.
Brittani Nichols is wintering in New York City and finding it to be terribly on brand.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BeesO2JlxIt/?taken-by=ddlovato
Demi Lovato could definitely kick my ass if she wanted to, and I am very much at peace with this information.
Stephanie Beatriz got a new dog and named him after cheese. He already has his own Instagram page.
Here’s your pal Mallory Ortberg giving a baby the ol’ what-for.
Gaby Dunn has apparently joined My Chemical Romance.
Join us next week, when we will hopefully be rich in photos of Stephanie Beatriz’s new dog.
Demi Lovato I am also a BJJ Blue Belt, fight me!
Brown belt, here! Hey-ho, let’s roll!
Oh damn, you’re gonna twist me like a pretzel
Maybe a little, but I’m a kindly old grappler for the most part. It’s nice to know that someone else around here trains!
Demi Lovato: brining queer grapplers together.
The question isn’t whether you could dance like that, but why you would want to.
I mean I’m sure Emma Portner is incredibly talented, but every time I see modern dance there’s a part of my brain that is saying “oh bless your heart” the entire time.
Ok fine, it’s my whole brain.
I used to feel this way about “Moves Like Jagger”. Like, why would I want to dance like that?
Then I realized that that’s not the kind of moves that Adam Levine is talking about and everything made more sense
OMG. I never got that until now. I really don’t see Mick Jagger as a sex symbol.
rofl
My entire thought process while watching that was “this is the whitest thing ever”
Sometimes I forget that I too am not an instagram celesbian because I also post weird selfies and pictures of dogs.
Since my daughter’s musical taste is currently limited to Paramore and angry/emo bands from the 00s, I am obligated to tell you that Gaby Dunn quoted Panic! At the Disco and not MCR. Sorry for being that person…
i know she did but i am 100% committed to making fun of gaby dunn at all costs and i don’t know any other panic at the disco jokes.