We’re firmly in this weird chapter of the pandemic where… well, the pandemic continues never ending… but somehow there’s also still the Met Ball? Which, if we’re honest, with ourselves, is kinda weird, right? I mean a “vaxed, everyone must where masks indoors” Met Ball, but nonetheless a Met Ball, indeed.
Thanks to the Coronavirus there hasn’t been a Met Ball in the last two Mays, but as long as Vogue Magazine lives and breathes, September will mean fashion, and so here we are the second Monday in September (not the infamous “first Monday in May”) with flamboyant dresses and suits to critique with the signature flourish and snark that is our right as gays.
lesbian fashion spectrum pic.twitter.com/i2T7j9Vquo
— paola (@paolalien) September 12, 2021
If you need a quick refresher on the Met Gala (formally known as the The Costume Institute Gala), it’s a fundraiser, co-sponsored by Anna Wintour and Vogue, supporting the Metropolitan Museum of Art and Costume Institute in New York City. It’s also the soft launch of the Metropolitan Museum’s annual fashion exhibit — basically, an unabashed love letter to the craft and art of fashion, with a red carpet more iconic than the gala itself, etc etc etc. This is the plot of every queer woman’s favorite movie to scream that Cate Blanchett and Sandra Bullock should just make out already, so I won’t belabor the point. The theme this year was “In America: A Lexicon of Fashion.” I’ve gathered all the queer and trans people I could find, so you have something to waste time scrolling through instead of whatever work it is you are trying to avoid (no judgement here!*). Let’s fucking go.
* By no judgement, I mean that I had every intention to get you this round up in time for your morning coffee, but instead I ate 1/2 a pack of Oreos and cried over the 17th time I’ve seen this episode of Grey’s Anatomy. Happy Met from me and my period!
Zoe Kravitz, in Yves Saint Laurent, and Tessa Thompson, in Iris van Herpen
😳 😳 😳
😳 😳 😳
Said it best:
long live unfriendly Black hotties https://t.co/S1nCzTLxc7
— zoë (@zoe_alliyah) September 14, 2021
Elliot Page, in Balenciaga
I’ve been informed that “oversized 90s suit” is indeed actually back in style and this fit was in fact intentional, so congratulations Elliot for being on trend! (Love those kicks wholeheartedly)
I never knew I wanted Jules from Euphoria starring in Marvel’s X-Men remake, but daaaaamn.
Yes Daddy, I do.
Cara Delevingne, in Dior
“If someone doesn’t know what this means, you’re gonna have to look it up” — Cara
OK! A FEW THINGS ABOUT THIS: 1. Cara and Dior did not come up with this phrase, and we have a few Autostraddle writers who are very curious if they paid the woman of color sex worker who did. 2. After four years in queer media, today was the first day I spelled Cara Delevingne right on the first try, which means I either get to level up to my final boss form or run away off the side of a cliff because my life has no meaning, and I can’t tell which. 3. This entire outfit/quote combo feels like if “trying too hard on your school project” was a person. I’m sorry.
It’s also important to me, personally, that you know that Zoe Kravitz really made the rounds last night.
Keke Palmer, in Sergio Hudson
It’s giving Classic Americana. It’s giving 70s Diva. It’s giving Diana Ross. And I liiiiiiiiive.
Has “step on my neck” gone out of style? Is “choke me” too straight forward for a first date? Can someone let me know in the comments?
Lily Rose Depp
She spent a lot of time very adorably hugging this person that I do not know…
And then also there was KStew, because of course, KStew.
Nikkie de Jager/Nikkitutorials
The dress is an intentional homage to Mother Marsha P. Johnson (peep the close up on the skirt below, with Marsha’s signature “Pay It No Mind”) and while I appreciate that fashion is political, and the purpose of uplifting our mother as an American icon given the theme of the night, but still.. something about this ain’t sitting quite white.
If you know what I mean.
Kim Petras, in Collina Strada
I have no commentary on Kim Petras. I did not know who Kim Petras was until I googled her last night. But a win for the horse girls, I suppose.
The Farrah Fawcett/Cruella DeVille hair.
The Liberace suit.
A lot of the commentary of last night’s (admittedly, often lackluster) red carpet was, “it’s prom.” And with zero disrespect I must say, never have those two small words been more felt in my soul than when looking at this picture of Lili Reinhart.
Barbie Ferreira, in Jonathan Simkhai
Speaking of prom, the Euphoria bbs had such fun last night! Barbie, you simply are gorgeous!
Until last night, Brazilian model Valentina Sampaio’s claim to fame was being the first trans model in Sports Illustrated. But I think we can all safely agree that after last night her claim to fame will be those wings. For my money, the best photo of the night.
I know I’m here on some party and bullshit, no thoughts just vibes and jokes, but you should read Indya’s caption on the Met Gala. It’s serious and well worth your time.
Megan Fox, in Dundas
Sorry, love a bi-con (hold one second for Gillian Anderson, she’s coming). But I can’t with these clip on bangs. I cannot.
What I love most about Gillian Anderson is that her entire vibe is as such that as a living bisexual legend, she does not ever have to do more on a red carpet than “just enough.”
Ilana Glazer, in Aliétte
Oh trust me, you’re gonna want to see this one from the back.
Mj Rodriguez, in Thom Browne
I sincerely appreciate Mj channeling the power of manifestation and coming dressed in the exact same silhouette as a literal award, less than five days ahead of her historic Emmy run. Congrats.
Cynthia Erivo continues to dance in that grey area between “out” and out out, so much so that it felt felt weighty whether or not to include her on today’s list — I asked no less than three different editors about it! — but ultimately the decision wasn’t ours, it was Cynthia’s. Those nails demanded our attention. And our attention they shall have.
Janet Mock, in Valentino
A classic in every way.
… And finally…