Kristen Stewart Is Seeking Gay Ghost Hunters and I’m Thrilled To Announce My New Career as a Gay Ghost Hunter

Stylist CJ Romero sent shockwaves through the aspiring gay ghost hunter community today when he posted a video of our very own gay icon Kristen Stewart announcing a formal casting call for her hotly anticipated paranormal queer reality TV show. It appears as though Kristen Stewart teaming up with the very esteemed Scout Productions (of Queer Eye and Legendary fame) and aforementioned CJ Romero to produce the currently untitled Gay Ghost Show.

“Hello, so I am scarily excited to announce that I’m teaming up with Scout, the producers of Queer Eye, Legendary, The Hype, on the most gayest most funnest most titillating queer ghost hunting show ever,” Kristen says in the video, adding an exciting physical gesture while she says the word “titillating.” She continues: “Casting begins! We need to find the most incredible LGBTQ+ ghost hunters, paranormal specialists, mediums, psychics, investigators who will lead the pack on this super gay ghost hunting adventure.”

She invites all those interested to apply at Ghost.CastingCrane.com. The graphic declares “a MAJOR STREAMER is now seeking the queerest and most fabulous experts in the paranormal space for a brand new outrageous ghost hunting extravaganza!”

At the casting website for Kristen Stewart’s Gay Ghost Show, you are invited to share your social media handles, some personal history, and indicate your area of expertise: Ghost Hunting, Historian, Paranormal Investigation, Medium, Psychic, Paranormal Tour Guide, Supernatural Psychometry and the ever-elusive “Other (Please explain below).”

Other questions include “What is the SCARIEST place you have ever investigated” and “What would you offer to a team of paranormal experts?” So sharpen your pencils, LGBTQIA+ paranormal community, your big chance to summon the ghost of Mercedes De Acosta or your childhood dog is here!!!!!!


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Riese

Riese is the 39-year-old Co-Founder and CEO of Autostraddle.com as well as an award-winning writer, blogger, fictionist, copywriter, video-maker and aspiring cyber-performance artist who grew up in Michigan, lost her mind in New York and then headed West. Her work has appeared in nine books including "The Bigger the Better The Tighter The Sweater: 21 Funny Women on Beauty, Body Image & Other Hazards Of Being Female," magazines including Marie Claire and Curve, and all over the web including Nylon, Queerty, Nerve, Bitch, Emily Books and Jezebel. She had a very popular personal blog once upon a time, and then she recapped The L Word, and then she had the idea to make this place, and now here we all are! In 2016, she was nominated for a GLAAD Award for Outstanding Digital Journalism. Follow her on twitter and instagram.

Riese has written 2962 articles for us.

5 Comments

  1. I’m definitely going to be applying for this. The special skill I have is “crying if I think there might maybe be ghosts somewhere” so I definitely think I’ll get it.

    • What I’m hearing is that you are emotionally attuned to the paranormal and serve as a sort of Geiger counter for psychic disturbances while also adding a level of emotional pathos that will let the audience easily identify with you as you experience the very gay dilemma of desire mingled with terror

  2. I am legit tempted to apply–“Do I have any experience in ghost-hunting or the supernatural? No. But I *am* gay, and I’m also an astrobiologist who literally helped write the book on exotic biochemistries/life as we don’t know it, so in the very unlikely event it turns out what you’re investigating is not, in fact, a ghost but some sort of bizarre plasma-based lifeform, I’m your girl”

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