How to Overcome Being a Pisces

So, you’re a Pisces. You make poetic gestures like it’s as easy as breathing. None of your sentences make sense. You open your mouth and the thought you thought you had comes out as “And that’s why your cat will always have one over on you” to the puzzlement of those within listening capacity.

You’re a Pisces and you’re the Boomhauer of the zodiac.

You’re a Pisces that’s still hung up on your ex who wasn’t really your ex. It was this chick who looked a lot like what you pictured when you read a young adult novel about a really cool girl that you forgot the name of. You and this girl exchanged words once, during which she touched your hand and eyes said something only you and her understood. You found her pencil once, or at least you think it was hers, and touch it when you’re in your dark bedroom ruminating.

Overcoming being a Pisces is hard work, but practical for the modern age. How can you ever manage to balance a checkbook when you get distracted because you’ve always thought that 3s and 5s look very similar and you estimate a $50 expense as $13?

The first thing you have to do when overcoming being a Pisces is to stop fixating on other people’s problems. Do you feel an inexplicable urge to text someone you only know in passing that you, mind reader you, know all of their follies and deepest desires? This desire to read other people will be the demise of you, not only because it’s a time waster, but because it lets everyone else know what’s going on in your head all the time. Your perspective gives away your location. Give away your own coordinates wisely and efficiently, not thoughtlessly.

The first thing you have to do is start getting your 3s and 5s straight. The second thing you have to do is throw away that pencil, because it never belonged to that girl in the first place and was actually the property of that gross and mean guy who bullied you. Get out of your head.

There’s a such thing as not eating enough nutrition and having an inflamed brain. There’s a reason that two hours of sleep, or twelve hours of sleep, makes you feel weird. There’s a reason that not seeing any sunlight or stretching your muscles makes you super lethargic, depressed, and anxious. Not everything is in your head – the rest of it is in your body.

Take good care of yourself

Eat your vitamins by eating colorful foods. Spend some time in the sun each and every day. Go to bed at a reasonable hour and don’t oversleep. Get your routine down pat, because routine is the vessel that keeps your Piscean waters safe.

When you’re a Pisces, you think that everyone is talking about you the moment you leave the room. It’s easy to read criticism into every encounter. To combat this, simply imagine all the good things that they may be saying about you. If you’re going to be paranoid, at least let the voices in your head be your inner cheerleaders.

Practice some positive self delusion

Every time you leave the room, imagine that everyone is talking about that really cool joke you made and your fantastic style choices. Imagine that they’re talking about how to support you on your next journey or appreciating the time that you went out of your way to do something for someone else.

The best thing to do as a Pisces is to get out of the house. Most of the time, as a Pisces, you don’t know where you are. This can lead to a strange feeling of bewilderment when you realize, suddenly, that you are miles away from your home after driving towards it for so long because you went in the wrong direction, or that you are actually in your bedroom when you were totally jumping on your bed and imagining yourself in a nightclub.

As a Pisces, you are exactly where you imagine yourself to be. I’m wondering, why change that at all? I’m also wondering, why do so many Pisces choose to imagine themselves to be in the depth of hell when it’s so easy for them live every day in heaven? Why imagine the worst when you can make the best come true simply through a feat of imagination?

Embrace it

Being a Pisces means taking a long and winding detour through the stuff of life. Why would you want to lose that? Step one of overcoming being a Pisces is to embrace being a Pisces. Enjoy yourself, Pisces. Enjoy that overactive imagination that you spent years building but make sure that you make your stories as wondrous as you deserve them to be.

Alice Sparkly Kat is a queer astrologer of color with four years of experience in individual consultation, lectures, workshops, and writing. They use astrology to speculate on the ways culture inhabits biology. To them, astrology is a process of imagining the cultural alien through the metaphor of outer space. Their website is alicesparklykat.com and instagram is @alicesparklykat

Alice has written 4 articles for us.

16 Comments

  1. wow thank you, needed this. sometimes I feel like being a Pisces is feeling constantly misunderstood, but it is also a blessing to feel & imagine so vividly.

    “The first thing you have to do when overcoming being a Pisces is to stop fixating on other people’s problems.” this happens all the goddam time… I wish I could be more centered on my own vibe, instead of absorbing everyone’s energy

    • As a Pisces sun AND Pisces moon, I have always been baffled by descriptions of myself through astrology (although feeling eternally misunderstood is definitely piscean). I hate poetic gestures, I never mix up my 3’s and 5’s, I still have that pencil but I’ve completely forgotten where it came from (it is instead a good luck charm because I lose everything except this damn pencil), and I don’t typically fixate on other people’s problems once they are no longer physically in my space.

      All that aside, so many things did actually resonate with me from this article. If I do not have/follow routines, I am floating through space and time in existential dread. My routines are all very nutrition and body-centered. Everytime I leave the room I imagine people are talking about my great style and conversation skills. And “the Boomhauer of the zodiac” made me lol because just the other day I decided I am a Lucky sun, Boomhauer moon, and Hank Hill rising.

  2. As a Pisces sun AND Pisces moon, I have always been baffled by descriptions of myself through astrology (although feeling eternally misunderstood is definitely piscean). I hate poetic gestures, I never mix up my 3’s and 5’s, I still have that pencil but I’ve completely forgotten where it came from (it is instead a good luck charm because I lose everything except this damn pencil), and I don’t typically fixate on other people’s problems once they are no longer physically in my space.

    All that aside, so many things did actually resonate with me from this article. If I do not have/follow routines, I am floating through space and time in existential dread. My routines are all very nutrition and body-centered. Everytime I leave the room I imagine people are talking about my great style and conversation skills. And “the Boomhauer of the zodiac” made me lol because just the other day I decided I am a Lucky sun, Boomhauer moon, and Hank Hill rising.

  3. This is breathtaking. I feel affirmed, called out and inspired all at once. I’m usually pretty wary of advice pieces because they feel like just another to-do list that I will never get to and all the advice ultimately feels kinda empty because while it would be wonderful to journal every day, or wake up with the sun, or practice gratitude, there are a million reasons why those things that are supposed to help us are in practice extremely hard to do. And knowing I should do them is totally different then actually being able to do them, you know? But your gentle reminders/nudges feel like actual things I can remember and practice; they’re what I didn’t know I needed to hear, so thank you.

  4. I’m a Pisces. I’m also a coherent writer and a logical computer programmer (I have a journalism degree and a Computer Information Systems diploma). I wouldn’t consider myself overly sensitive. I’m not at all forgetful or flighty. When I stop crushing on someone, it’s like a switch is flipped. When I’m in a strange city, I look confident enough that people ask me for directions. You got me on the mild narcissism, though — I clicked this despite never identifying with Pisces descriptions, after all.

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